Just a quick back story: Most of my fiance's friends and family members live in Massachusetts and mine all live in or just outside of New Jersey. I consider myself very blessed to be having two showers thrown for me; one by my mother's best friend and the second by my future mother-in-law.
It was decided by the hosts that guests would be invited/divided up according to the location closest to them. Also, my future mother-in-law was gracious enough to host the Mass. party at her home which cannot host a ton of guests. This party was also intended to include her very large family.
The problem: Once friends and family became aware that there would be two parties they assumed that translated into two options. Now I have people not asking but telling me which party they will be attending, even though it is the further distance for them (ie: my aunt stated that she would be going to the shower in Mass. with her two daughters).
This really becomes difficult given the size of the two homes and makes the party's numbers significantly unbalanced. Is out of line to send the invites according to what is most convenient for the hosts and inform the few demanders that it simply is not what we planned? How can we follow through with our original plan without making people feel as though they are unwelcome at their desired location?