controlled receiving line?

Bett2012

Hi everyone,

We will definitely be doing table visits during the reception, but FI is set on doing a receiving line (with just the two of us) as well "for the people who come who aren't actually invited" (in our church it is quite common for people from the congregation to come to the ceremony only even if they're not invited, and we've had a few university friends say they will come even though they know they won't be invited).

Is there a way to control the length of the receiving line without being rude? If not, we will just suck it up and have fewer pictures taken.

Thanks in advance for your suggestions!

LittleMissCutiePie

Not really. With a receiving line, you run the risk of not having as much picture time, and it's a risk you need to take. The only thing I will say is to just keep the line moving. People are generally good about not monopolizing your time when there's a line-up, but sometimes people use it as a opportunity to "catch up". Just keep it short and sweet with each guest.

StephBeanWed61502

What about doing "first look" pictures before the ceremony?  Then it won't matter how long the receiving line is.  FI and I are doing pictures before our ceremony, and the day-of schedule looks like it's going to flow a lot more smoothly because of it (plus we'll get to go to our own cocktail hour, yay!).

Bett2012

"It's likely that your invited guests will also go through the receiving line.  I can't think of any way to let them know that those who were invited will get a table visit and the uninvited must go through the receiving line."

Yes, this is exactly what I was thinking!

Would it be rude, if an invited guest tries to use it as "catch up" time, to say that we're going to catch up with more time during the reception?

Thanks for your fast replies!

Bett2012

We're kind of traditional in that sense.. we aren't living together before hand, or having first looks. But if we weren't so stuck on having our first look be during our ceremony, it would definitely help.

sister2groom

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_controlled-receiving-line?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:da3f7c38-a3ec-44f6-88f7-38d0dff050e6Post:798ed10d-56e9-4d9a-8e7c-42a2d48a1ea0">Re: controlled receiving line?</a>:
[QUOTE]" Would it be rude, if an invited guest tries to use it as "catch up" time, to say that we're going to catch up with more time during the reception?
<div>Posted by Bett2012[/QUOTE]

</div><div>I think someting along the lines of "Thanks for coming, great t see you, I look forward to catching up more at the reception" would get the point across.</div>

Simply Fated

Would it be rude, if an invited guest tries to use it as "catch up" time, to say that we're going to catch up with more time during the reception?
Not really, but I guess it would depend on your phrasing. Just like on days when it isn't your wedding, when you run into someone who wants to play catch-up with you, it would be rude to just brush them off, kwim?
A lot of people actually think that the purpose of receiving lines IS to catch-up, so you have to tread lightly. Keep in mind, these people are playing catch-up because they want to catch-up with you. It's flattering, so try to enjoy it instead of feeling rushed.

Instead of doing first look pictures before the ceremong, try other pictures, like with you and your bridesmaids and other family members.

Bett2012

Thanks for all your advice, ladies!

We will definitely be doing separate pictures before the 11am ceremony and then joined pictures after the ceremony. We have an hour between the ceremony and cocktail hour for guests to visit/travel (and for us to do a receiving line/pictures). 

We don't plan on being able to get to cocktail hour, but we don't want to push the cermony forward or the reception back, so I think we'll have the receiving line and if any of our invited guests start in on a larger conversation, we'll express our excitement to catch up with them soon at the reception to keep it moving.

Thanks so much

Bett2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_controlled-receiving-line?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:da3f7c38-a3ec-44f6-88f7-38d0dff050e6Post:38553ff8-193b-4195-9397-9f5c39dc4b7c">Re: controlled receiving line?</a>:
[QUOTE]Our receiving line after our ceremony only took 20 minutes, and probably 175-180 of our 220 guests went through it. We had very few guests who wanted to really chat, most just said we looked great, or the ceremony was beautiful or whatever, and moved out of the line. I wouldn't worry too much about having to move too many people along, but if you do have a few that are chatty, I think it is fine to say that you will see them at the reception, politely.
Posted by mrs.jesse[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>That's a relief - thanks for sharing. I have only a few past wedding experiences where I was a guest at the end of the receiving line and it seemed to last forever, though that might have just been my perspective.. so I was envisioning this never ending line of small-chat :P</div>

whitsy

 I was going to say something similar as mrs. jesse. We had 150 guests, and it honestly only took maybe 15 minutes. No one stopped to chat at all. It was all very short and sweet.

Belle0000

Did you consider dismissing people from each row? That's what we plan on doing. I've seen it done, and people seem to move along a little more quickly when the bride and groom are dismissing guests by row, rather than doing a receiving line.

Bett2012

No, I have never even heard of that. Not sure about whether or not it would be awkward for the whole room to be watching you greet people (though they'd get caught up in their own conversation and not even notice probably). I will look into it! Thanks.

Belle0000

We want to do something at the ceremony instead of doing table visits at the reception, and our church's lobby is a little small, so we decided we're going to dismiss people. 

And it's kinda nice that people can sit and wait until you get to their row, rather than stand in a line.  When we saw it done, the people waiting just sat and chatted with each other. 

GGwedding102

I have honestly not been to a wedding since I was like 8 and I don't know how things are supposed to be done. I wasn't even planning on having a recieving line at the church I was going to do an exit from the church and go take a few pictures then head to the reception. Do I need to stay at the church a have a recieving line right after the ceremony?

Bett2012

As long as you greet your guests at some point... receiving line at ceremony or reception, or table visits at reception, I think you're good... my FI just REALLY wants to greet all the guests, even ones not at the reception (weddings at the church are open to everyone to come, which is why there will be some people at the ceremony but not at the reception)

JanC703

Instead of having a receiving line, my daughter & husband "ushered" everyone out.   After they walked down the aisle, they came back & had a chance to meet & greet everyone at the ceremony.    Everyone enjoyed it!