Addressing Save the Dates

laurAndJer

Hi, I am starting to work on my Save the Dates and I have some questions about addressing them.

1. For people  in a relationship - First, I will be inviting them with their guest should I specify that on the Save the Date? I thought it would be nice to use the name of the significant other but I'm not sure what you're supposed to do. So if John Doe is my cousin should it go out to:

John Doe or John Doe & Guest or John Doe and Jane Smith?

2.  This goes with question 1 and will help me with invitations as well. A couple in a relationship that does not live together - can I send the Save the Date to John Doe's address but address it to John Doe and Jane Smith even though they do not live at the same address?

3. Someone I am inviting with guest because they will not know anyone - do I specify that they will be invited with guest on the Save the Date?

4. Everyone - Should I be formal in how people are addressed? i.e. Mr. John Doe, Mr. and Mrs. John Doe? Or should it be casual i.e. John and Jane Doe?

5. What is the difference between Ms. and Miss, if any?

Thank you very much in advance!

danieliza1127

1.  Yes if you know their significant other's name, you should definitely use it on the STD card. 

2.  If the couple is together but not married:

Mr. John Doe
Ms. Jane Smith
address

If they live together, use their address.  If they don't live together, pick an address and use it.

3. You can, or you can verbally let them know that they will be invited with a guest.  Be sure to include it on the actual invitation though, or try to find out their guest's name before invitations go out.

4. Optional, either way is fine for a save the date.

5. Miss is for anyone under 18 that is not married, I think. 

MattsPenguin

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_addressing-save-dates-7?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:dcb16f9c-038e-4dd6-845e-fd7d56830160Post:06c87d95-ea0d-4cd4-bded-7af3d9a22d78">Addressing Save the Dates</a>:
[QUOTE]Hi, I am starting to work on my Save the Dates and I have some questions about addressing them.
1. For people  in a relationship - First, I will be inviting them with their guest should I specify that on the Save the Date? I thought it would be nice to use the name of the significant other but I'm not sure what you're supposed to do. So if John Doe is my cousin should it go out to: John Doe or John Doe & Guest or John Doe and Jane Smith? <strong>Try to use their SO's name.</strong>
2.  This goes with question 1 and will help me with invitations as well. A couple in a relationship that does not live together - can I send the Save the Date to John Doe's address but address it to John Doe and Jane Smith even though they do not live at the same address? <strong>If you address it to both (this is what I am doing.  It just seems easier), be sure to put them on separate lines and with no with "and" between the names, which would indicate marriage.</strong>
3. Someone I am inviting with guest because they will not know anyone - do I specify that they will be invited with guest on the Save the Date? <strong>It may be nice to indicate that they will be invited with a guest, so that they know to make the proper arrangements.</strong>
4. Everyone - Should I be formal in how people are addressed? i.e. Mr. John Doe, Mr. and Mrs. John Doe? Or should it be casual i.e. John and Jane Doe? <strong>Here you could go either way.  Formal address should be used on the invitations, however STD's are typically less formal, and you could probably use a more casual salutation.</strong>
5. What is the difference between Ms. and Miss, if any? Thank you very much in advance! <strong>Ms. can be used for an unmarried woman over the age of 18.  Miss is typically used for young girls under 18.</strong>
Posted by laurAndJer[/QUOTE]

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

For couples, I addressed both on the STD. I also indicated if singles could bring an "and guest". I did this because I only sent STDs to OOT guests and several booked flights/hotel rooms right away - I wanted them to know if they could bring someone.

It's "most proper" to send individual STDs/invites to couples living separately, but I just sent them to the person I knew better. If you are friends with both and both would be invited regardless of relationship status, send one to each. If someone is only invited because they are the SO of a guest, I'd just send one.

STDs can be addressed casually. I addressed them the same way I addressed the invitations.

Ms. is for any woman, regardless of age or marital status. I addressed married women who use their husband's last names as Mrs. Everyone else was addressed as Ms. I don't mind being called Miss, but many adult women think it seems juvenile.

MattsPenguin

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_addressing-save-dates-7?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:dcb16f9c-038e-4dd6-845e-fd7d56830160Post:777fd8ce-d6d4-4927-85cf-1fadb6c9bf51">Re: Addressing Save the Dates</a>:
[QUOTE] Ms. is for any woman, regardless of age or marital status. I addressed married women who use their husband's last names as Mrs. Everyone else was addressed as Ms. I don't mind being called Miss, but many adult women think it seems juvenile.
Posted by msmerymac[/QUOTE]

Mery is more correct in her use of "Ms."