How Could She Not Know???

jayjoe

So i'm sitting here at work and for reasons i cannot explain, Lori Trespicio pops into my head. She was on the Real World Back to NY with Coral and Miz. Havent thought about her since, uh, the show ended? Anyway, i google her real quick and it turns out she got married a few weeks ago and her wedding channel page comes up. The usual: Macy's, Crate and Barrel, Travelers Joy..wait..what?

http://www.travelersjoy.com/loriandgregswedding

The usual "we have a small place, we need nothing but god we're looking forward to our honeymoon" stuff. Just thought anyone who remembers her would get a kick out of it. I've never actually seen a HM registry and i feel dirty now.

jayjoe

Wait..i jsut noticed that they are not only asking money for excursions but they are asking for people to pay for their hotel stays.

dumdumfroggie

Ugh.  Gross.

mari0225

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_could-she-not?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e5123fab-cc60-46e9-930d-b365f8947a7ePost:39366ff9-6087-421a-9a34-96b1c0eb31d9">Re: How Could She Not Know???</a>:
[QUOTE]Ugh.  Gross.
Posted by dumdumfroggie[/QUOTE]

Ditto!

KarleeKrause35

The whole thing is funny to me. It's like "We know you don't really want to do this, but... That's beside the point. Now donate."

jayjoe

No one i know personally has done this but from what ive heard from people here its all about the excursions. I had NO clue that it also included hotel stays! And she was like "here is where we are staying for this many nights" and then i scroll down and shes asking people to pay for those nights! LOL i dont know why i'm so blown away by this, i dont even know this girl.

ootmother2

::blink::  ::blink::

jayjoe?  That really you?

lbarr088

This is really weird to me.  I don't think I'd ever feel comfortable asking guests to donate specifically to my HM fund.  Sure, if I got money as a wedding gift and wanted to put it towards that, then sure but this... this is weird.

kantonik

I've heard of HM funds before, but never actually paying for individual excursions and nights for the trip. I don't think I'd feel comfortable with that one.

Simply Fated

For 4 nights in Kauai she still needs 28 gifts of $75 each.

That's over $2,100.

In Maui she still needs 66 gifts of $50 each.

That's over $3,250

In Lanai she still needs 77 gifts of $50.

That's 3,850.

Assuming she still needs all those "gifts" filled by the time she leaves for her honeymoon, let's hope she has $9,200 for this trip, otherwise all those other "gifts" people are giving are going to go to waste.


Pretty much everything she chose is super pricey, at least the ones we can see are. I mean, the total amounts for the gifts. She has them broken up into smaller denominations and, of course, there is the Ah May Zing general money contribution area at the bottom.
So if the guests pay for all that stuff and they don't pay for the hotel accomodations, then what? And what if someone pays for part of the gift and she can't pay for the rest of it? Does she put the money elsewhere and the guest is deceived? This just has me all kinds of annoyed.


ETA: I just saw that the dates on the site are from last November. So... did she just have to pay for her own hotel stay and the rest of the gift contributions that went uncompleted?

Grits8812

I hope she is having a wedding with at least a million people so she can go on that awfully expensive honeymoon.

Simply Fated

It will be a private, tropical, unique Thanksgiving for us this year!

I'll give her tropical, but how private does she really want it when she is telling everyone her exact itinerary. And, sorry, but Hawaii as a HM destination isn't "unique," even during Thanksgiving.

AmethystMSU

What's worse is how many of those "items" are fulfilled

lbarr088

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_could-she-not?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e5123fab-cc60-46e9-930d-b365f8947a7ePost:57d59b00-9293-433d-b58d-14c1a3159f61">How Could She Not Know???</a>:
[QUOTE]So i'm sitting here at work and for reasons i cannot explain, Lori Trespicio pops into my head. She was on the Real World Back to NY with <strong>Coral </strong>and Miz. 
Posted by jayjoe[/QUOTE]

<div>I love Coral... what ever happened to her?  (Not to change the subject, but really... she is bad ass.)</div>

jayjoe

Yes OOT, its me LOL I lurk here everyday, post rarely. The last 3 months have been crazy at work but its been slowing down. How are you??

Yes to everyone. I went to Hawaii for my HM and the word "unique" is not something i would use. My hotel was full of people on their HM's as well. For our HM we went to Oahu and stayed at the Hawaaian Hilton Village for 3 days and then the Four Seasons in Maui for another 9 days. My husband is a computer consultant and at the time he traveled 90% of the year and stayed at Hiltons. We used frequent flyer miles and didnt pay for air travel. We used his Hilton points and didnt pay for that hotel. The total for just paying for the 4 Season with a few days of room service and poolside service was nowhere near as much as she is asking (we are also lazy and did zero excursions, we were all about relaxing and some light sight-seeing). Even then, i could never imagine asking, or being asked, to pay for scuba diving or spa treatments. If i had the money for that, i'd be doing them for myself LOL

LoriRegan35

<div>Oh, hello all.  Lori Regan here, formally Lori Trespicio.  I was alerted to this posting, and I figured I'd take a moment to comment since everyone else had so much to say on the topic while clearly having absolutely no familiarity with this increasingly common practice in wedding registries.  Allow me to educate you...</div><div>
</div><div>As stated on my honeymoon registry, the actual reason we chose a honeymoon registry over the more traditional routes of asking for dishes and pots is that because we are two successful adults in our 30s who had already acquired on our own prior to even meeting all our plates and bowls that we could ever use for the foreseeable future.  We didn't feel it financially practical to toss all our perfectly functional belongings to ask friends and family to buy us new ones.  And seeing as our previous residence was under 800 square feet, we also thought it off to ask for anything we couldn't actually store.   </div><div>
</div><div>Our first idea was to simply not register at all.  This idea was met with a wave of discouragement and warnings from all our married friends.  As a gift is custom, no matter how obnoxious it feels to ask for it, not registering at all would open the door for creativity, which sometimes results in unwelcomed, unreturnable, unusable gifts.  Yes, any gift at all is a wonderful gesture, but let's be honest, the gift giver prefers to be told what to give you and doesn't want to spend too much time being creative, and the give recipient would generally prefer something she/he would like or could use. </div><div>
</div><div>Honeymoon registries aren't even registered FOR any of those specific events.  They serve more as suggestions.  It is a way of saying - thank you wanting to give us a gift at all, and rather than saying, "Hey, write me a check and make it out to cash!"  you create an account within the registry that is then returned to you with some fees removed (not at ALL at the expense of the guest's donation).  Then we made the effort to actually do all the things on our registry as a thank you to the guest for making that selection. </div><div>
</div><div>The honeymoon sites prefer that you personalize your registry though stock pics and descriptions are provided.  We did so with ours.  An approach of, "Give me money for my honeymoon," is not considered very savvy, and thus presenting actual "gifts" in the forms of excursions and hotel stays allows the gift giver to visualize a more tangible contribution, something more colorful and romantic than money that could just go to help paying off credit card debt, or picking up some more swiffer dusters at CVS.  </div><div>
</div><div>No, we didn't love the idea of putting the hotels on there, but we also didn't want people selecting that they wanted their contribution to go to bungie jumping if we had no intention to do so.  So, we just kept it as realistic as possible to our actual itinerary as we simply ran out of adventurous things we knew we'd want to do.  You need to have enough items so that if people so wanted to contribute to something other than writing a check, they would have that option without later feeling slighted or disappointed if they "purchased" a water skiing event, and we'd have to later explain, we used it for the spa, or dinner.  </div><div>
</div><div>Sure, people didn't have to give us anything at all, even though that is the etiquette.  But saying, "Help us stay at the Four Seasons in Maui," isn't nearly as crude as, "Whaddya got in your wallet?  Yeah, I'll take that."  </div><div>
</div><div>So, that is where we landed, and my friends seemed to enjoy learning about what we were going to do on our honeymoon.  The reason they cared is because...those are my friends.  It wasn't actually about impressing people who are googling Z-rated reality cast members from over a decade ago.  </div><div>
</div><div>I hope you've since taken a bath to wash off that emotional filth brought on by my ever so offensive though completely practical, well thought-out, and widely-accepted-among-those-in-the-know honeymoon registry.  </div><div>
</div><div>Good luck with all your weddings, and let all your guests, as well as all those not on the invite list who take the time to stalk you, find your registries leaving them feeling nothing short of clean.  </div><div>
</div><div>-Lori</div><div>
</div><div>
</div>In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_could-she-not?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e5123fab-cc60-46e9-930d-b365f8947a7ePost:57d59b00-9293-433d-b58d-14c1a3159f61">How Could She Not Know???</a>:
[QUOTE]So i'm sitting here at work and for reasons i cannot explain, Lori Trespicio pops into my head. She was on the Real World Back to NY with Coral and Miz. Havent thought about her since, uh, the show ended? Anyway, i google her real quick and it turns out she got married a few weeks ago and her wedding channel page comes up. The usual: Macy's, Crate and Barrel, Travelers Joy..wait..what? <a href="http://www.travelersjoy.com/loriandgregswedding" rel="nofollow">http://www.travelersjoy.com/loriandgregswedding</a> The usual "we have a small place, we need nothing but god we're looking forward to our honeymoon" stuff. Just thought anyone who remembers her would get a kick out of it. I've never actually seen a HM registry and i feel dirty now.
Posted by jayjoe[/QUOTE]

LoriRegan35

<div>Regarding your questions:  The honeymoon was paid in its entirety prior to the trip.  The gifts aren't direct contributions where we don't go to that hotel if we don't get the cash in time.  You couldn't cash in your account enough in advance to have the money transferred, and you couldn't reserve your hotels or the excursions without knowing you can pay for them in advance.  We would have had an identical honeymoon regardless of the honeymoon registry, it's just that instead of asking for a toaster we don't need, that same money would end up reducing the cost of the honeymoon in the long run.  If you were all actually interested in how this work, you could easily read ANY "How does this work" section of the FAQs of any honeymoon registry.  Though it would seem the discussion is focused more on mocking for the sake of mocking.  </div><div>
</div>In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_could-she-not?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e5123fab-cc60-46e9-930d-b365f8947a7ePost:654b40f8-4dfd-40f7-bc87-a24ae224542a">Re: How Could She Not Know???</a>:
[QUOTE]For 4 nights in Kauai she still needs 28 gifts of $75 each. That's over $2,100. In Maui she still needs 66 gifts of $50 each. That's over $3,250 In Lanai she still needs 77 gifts of $50. That's 3,850. Assuming she still needs all those "gifts" filled by the time she leaves for her honeymoon, let's hope she has $9,200 for this trip, otherwise all those other "gifts" people are giving are going to go to waste. Pretty much everything she chose is super pricey, at least the ones we can see are. I mean, the total amounts for the gifts. She has them broken up into smaller denominations and, of course, there is the Ah May Zing general money contribution area at the bottom. So if the guests pay for all that stuff and they don't pay for the hotel accomodations, then what? And what if someone pays for part of the gift and she can't pay for the rest of it? Does she put the money elsewhere and the guest is deceived? This just has me all kinds of annoyed. ETA: I just saw that the dates on the site are from last November. So... did she just have to pay for her own hotel stay and the rest of the gift contributions that went uncompleted?
Posted by Simply Fated[/QUOTE]

LoriRegan35

<div>Unique to <em>us</em> as we don't typically fly to Hawaii from Boston for Thanksgiving.  We weren't claiming that Hawaii was a unique honeymoon, genius.   </div><div>
</div><div>
</div>In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_could-she-not?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e5123fab-cc60-46e9-930d-b365f8947a7ePost:c80bd4e3-2fd0-4f91-86ea-65b4aaee3f27">Re: How Could She Not Know???</a>:
[QUOTE]It will be a private, tropical, unique Thanksgiving for us this year! I'll give her tropical, but how private does she really want it when she is telling everyone her exact itinerary. And, sorry, but Hawaii as a HM destination isn't "unique," even during Thanksgiving.
Posted by Simply Fated[/QUOTE]