Seating predicament

sevyn

To keep this as brief as possible...

My fiancé's mother separated from his father, remarried, and has another child with her new husband.  What's the most acceptable way to seat everyone, ideally without offending anyone?

We are figuring that it's still techincally correct to seat the mother and father together, but don't know what to do about my fiancé's half brother or stepfather.  We know his stepfather will understand if that's what we do, but don't know where to seat him.  Help please? 

Loopyseven

Seat the stepfather and half brother with the mother.  You don't break up social units by seating them separately.  The half brother should be sat with his parents at both the ceremony and the reception.

Ceremony - If people get along and can act like adults have them all sit in the first pew, one big family with father, mother, stepfather, half brother, other family as room allows.  If they can't sit in the same row without WWIII breaking out, put the mother and step father in a different pew than the father with appropriate family to fill up the row.  ie: father & some family in 1st or second row / mother, stepfather, half brother and other family in the 1st or 2nd row.

Reception - Same principles apply father, mother, stepfather, half brother, other family at one big table, or have father host a table with his side of the family and mother, stepfather, half brother host a different table with her family.  

Peledreamsofrain

It sounds like you are thinking about doing a head table.  Perhaps just doing a sweetheart table will alleviate all this social stickiness.  That way all the couples can sit with one another, and potential drama is avoided.

Loopyseven

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_seating-predicament?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e7b6fddc-9064-4fdb-a92d-f1f2bfce00d4Post:e9f525aa-b480-4a27-b5b5-dc245d7be23c">Re: Seating predicament</a>:
[QUOTE]It sounds like you are thinking about doing a head table.  Perhaps just doing a sweetheart table will alleviate all this social stickiness.  That way all the couples can sit with one another, and potential drama is avoided.
Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]

<div>Parents don't usually sit at a head table, so I don't think that's where she's going with this.</div>

Kate61487

ditto Loopy.  if they can all get along like adults, great, seat them together.  If not then make sure they are seated with their SOs and fill in accordingly. 

I'm not really sure what you are used to seeing that makes you think the mom and dad should sit together and the step father NOT.  I can't think of a situation where there's only two seats and you have to sit others elsewhere.  If you can give us more info about what you assumed should happen maybe we can offer even better suggestions?

Lisa50

Etiquette directs that you seat the married couple together, with their children (natural, step, adopted, whatever).  If your FI's mom and dad get along, then seat everyone in the same row (pew).  The best way to find out is to ask.

Disclaimer:  I am the divorced and re-married mom of an adult son.  My son's father and I do not get along; we're not friends.  Guess what?  When our son is at the center of a moment, we are there for him.  Period.  When he gets married, believe me, we'll both be there.  Both of us, sitting in the front pew.