Wedding Etiquette Forum

wedding update - long

highlights... The Bride and groom looked beautiful.

 The room was beautiful.  The room's walls were white with very tall ceilings.  They tables had very high vases with orange colored water and beautiful flowers.  They had white table clothes with orange lace overlays.  Champange glasses with alternating orange and gold colored napkins.  They also had gold chargers on tables.   Chairs were covered in white chair covers with orange sashes.

The bridal party looked beautiful.  The guys in white suits with orange ties and vests.  Girls in Champange with orange sashes.  Except for the MOH, she had a weird white dress that looked bride-ish and had ugly champange long gloves.

Co-workers and friends - they really showed  they care about the couple.  People here (including myself) will say family and friends should not do work.  Well tonight showed me that friends really helped make this couples day.  The bride is a cook.  All of her direct co-workers (all work under DH) helped cook and serve the food.  Other co-workers were bartenders, DJ and other things.  DH was proud he has a staff that truly loves and cares about each other.

Open bar was great.

Odd and WT?  moments:  Tables and chairs for 120 people, 200+ showed up for a buffet dinner (I do not normally mind for passed cocktail parties, but dinner with forks, knives, etc, I mind).  Not only that, there was no room to stand either.  A bunch of people stood outside (which was cooler in one aspect).   We scored a spot at the bar.  But even that was limited. 

There was not even any room for a dance floor, even though the DJ was great.

There was an announcement in 3 different languages telling the men that woman should not be standing and to be gentlemen and give their seat up.

There was announcement in English, Spanish and French that the gold chargers on the tables were not the buffet plates. Also the napkins were not to be used either.

They were not serving any champange or wine at the open bar, so I'm not sure what the glasses on the table were for.

2 minutes into the buffet being open, people loading up to-go containers.  This is an addition to getting a plate of food for themselves.   I was like WTF?  Why are people making to-go plates, when only the bridal party has gone through the buffet line.

2.5 hours after getting to the reception, the line was so long for the buffet, we never got to eat and ended up at Wendy's on our way home.

We were instructed to find a pen to put our names on the outside of the card envelope.  I have know idea why, but they looked at us liike we were crazy for not knowing.


Overall we had fun, but were confused also.







What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 

Re: wedding update - long

  • Glad you had fun!!
    A few things I could understand why, I'd be confused too.
    One thing is, that's the out come of not having "RSVP's" ..
    But sounds like alot of fun outside the crowd.
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  • I think the weirdest one is that you weren't supposed to use the napkins! WTF?!
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  • That sounds... um, eventful. lol  Glad you had a good time overall.  Way to go in dodging that ceremony bullet.
  • It's interesting to hear how wedding etiquette is different in different places.
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  • Listening to some of the other guests, everything but not having enought seats was 'normal' for an island wedding (including being 2 hours late for the start of the ceremony).

    Not having enough seats was a major complaint.
     






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • edited January 2010

    That is all very interesting! I too am perplexed by the napkins, though!

    When my brother was in Tanzania, he was invited in to a wedding (they didn't know anyone there- nor did they speak the language- but he and his friends had been nearby when the bridal party started walking down that way, and some members of the church grabbed them and asked them to come in). They were invited to the reception afterwards but didn't go, however both the ceremony and what they were told about the reception sounded really interesting. I would love to go to weddings for other cultures and see how others do it!

     

    We were talking to an Indian couple we know (who actually own/run the Indian shop near where we used to live- we went there so often we became friends, haha) and they were telling us about their wedding in India last year, just before ours. They had 800 guests (apparently this was quite small in comparison to most) and the celebrations spanned days. 

  • Maybe the napkis were like the nice towels my mom puts in the bathroom for holidays. They are technically hand towels, but you get in big trouble for actually using them. That is very weird..
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  • sounds like fun anyway! napkins and champagne glasses were the biggest WTF? for me.
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