Puke my guts out.

marissa_claire

FI's family was in town over the weekend.  His sis got engaged about a month ago, and some of you may recall the "does size matter post" but her ring is grotesque.  And she actually says things aloud I would be embarrassed to think, like "I'm so glad the band is really thin because it makes the diamond look soooo much bigger!"

Yeah, also she doesn't want to have kids at her wedding basically so she can invite a lot of OOT guests without them coming (most will obviously not just leave their kids at home) but she wants to hopefully get $$ from these people.  I was a little shocked to hear.... most people don't want kids because they don't like kids.  She doesn't want kids because she wants people to not even come.  How about you not invite them then???

crfische

I don' think it's fair to say that people who don't want kids at their wedding don't like kids.

I love kids. I just didn't want them at our wedding.

mkrupar

FSIL sounds like a peach. Take solice in the fact that you're nothing like her, and I'm sure other people notice as well.

ETA: I agree with Fische, some people do love kids, they just might not want them at that type of event. Personally, I love kids, and will have them at their wedding, but it's not for everyone.

marissa_claire

Yeah, but do most people not want kids to keep the parents home?  And hope to get a gift from said parents at the same time?  I hope that not's anyone's intent around here!

AdeleDazeem

I will never understand the argument: well, if the kids aren't invited, what in the world are the parents supposed to do?  Leave them at home?? 

There are these people... they are called friends, babysitters, grandparents, etc.  My parents left me with them often so they could go be adults.  It's a really novel concept.

But, yeah, your future SIL sounds like crap.

marissa_claire

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_puke-guts-out?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:e9de156d-f768-4c46-910d-99b0dfef30c9Post:e64dfb67-7df1-4e13-aaa1-f060a5c680e7">Re: Puke my guts out.</a>:
[QUOTE]I will never understand the argument: well, if the kids aren't invited, what in the world are the parents supposed to do?  Leave them at home??  There are these people... they are called friends, babysitters, grandparents, etc.  My parents left me with them often so they could go be adults.  It's a really novel concept. But, yeah, your future SIL sounds like crap.
Posted by Joy2611[/QUOTE]

Also, she's mostly talking about OOT guests with kids.  And yeah, OOT guests will almost certainly not come if they can't bring their kids.  Sorry if I phrased it poorly above, but just trying to get across her main motive being to invite people that won't come with the intent of getting presents. 

PsyDet 2155

That's really bizarre.  She sounds like a peach.

ARod22

How in the world will keeping people from coming invite them to send in money?  I can't follow this logic.

ETA: Nevermind.  I misread and feel stupid ;-P

I'm a preschool teacher, and I totally understand not wanting kids at a wedding no matter how much you love them.  I happen to have kids coming to my wedding, though..

crfische

Well, no, I don't think it's in good taste for that to be her motivation, and she sounds like a tool, but as long as she isn't stating on the invites HEY! DONT COME BUT SEND US YOUR MONEY! She's not technically doing anything wrong. Unless it's ONLY the OOT people she's inviting without kids?

AdeleDazeem

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_puke-guts-out?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e9de156d-f768-4c46-910d-99b0dfef30c9Post:9dcd4433-3742-482b-a723-396112248cf6">Re: Puke my guts out.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Puke my guts out. : Also, she's mostly talking about OOT guests with kids.  And yeah, OOT guests will almost certainly not come if they can't bring their kids.  Sorry if I phrased it poorly above, but just trying to get across her main motive being to invite people that won't come with the intent of getting presents. 
Posted by marissa_claire[/QUOTE]

Yeah.. again.  My parents traveled to EUROPE without my sister and I when I was about ten.  And again when I was about 12.  I really don't get parents who insist that their little darlings must be invited everywhere. 

Of course there are situations where parents simply have no other choice but to decline an invite because of childcare, but that's parenting.  And really - my parents went places without us and we stayed with other people.  It was ::gasp:: FUN!

andy71781

I don't really get what your title has to do with your post.

crfische

Andy, I think it's akin to "gag me with a spoon."

andy71781

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_puke-guts-out?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e9de156d-f768-4c46-910d-99b0dfef30c9Post:a7f500f1-9d99-4a51-962b-b640dba55e1f">Re: Puke my guts out.</a>:
[QUOTE]Andy, I think it's akin to "gag me with a spoon."
Posted by crfische[/QUOTE]
the kids will do that if their parents leave them alone because they are going to an OOT wedding? 

marissa_claire

I know it's not an end all.  I'm sure some parents will come without their kids.  I'm more just pointing out that she actually said that.  Wouldn't you side-eye one of your friends if they said "I'm inviting all these people without their kids so that they don't come but hopefully will still send $$"?  You totally would. 

And yes, I know she's not going to write on the invite "No kids allowed, but we're registered at...", so I know she's not going to be technically rude to people, it's more just obnoxious that she would even say these things out loud.  Of course this is the first of many things she's said aloud that I'd be ashamed to even think.

ARod22

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_puke-guts-out?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:e9de156d-f768-4c46-910d-99b0dfef30c9Post:9c869256-53e6-45cf-b8cd-2663078573bf">Re: Puke my guts out.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Puke my guts out. : the kids will do that if their parents leave them alone because they are going to an OOT wedding? 
Posted by andy71781[/QUOTE]

No, the OP meant "Ugh, can you believe this?"

andy71781

I get it I get it.  I just think its silly to vent about somebody ELSE's wedding that doesn't have any effect on yours. 

ARod22

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_puke-guts-out?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:e9de156d-f768-4c46-910d-99b0dfef30c9Post:64f2e49c-bd80-417a-a60b-4b07c6f155d9">Re: Puke my guts out.</a>:
[QUOTE]I get it I get it.  I just think its silly to vent about somebody ELSE's wedding that doesn't have any effect on yours. 
Posted by andy71781[/QUOTE]

Yes, true.  But this is what we're all about, isn't it? :)

crfische

The Hokey Pokey. THATS what it's all about.

fyrefairie

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_puke-guts-out?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:e9de156d-f768-4c46-910d-99b0dfef30c9Post:383e19fa-bb26-4a2e-8f6c-6cdc560422e7">Re: Puke my guts out.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Puke my guts out. : Yeah.. again.  My parents traveled to EUROPE without my sister and I when I was about ten.  And again when I was about 12.  I really don't get parents who insist that their little darlings must be invited everywhere.  Of course there are situations where parents simply have no other choice but to decline an invite because of childcare, but that's parenting.  And really - my parents went places without us and we stayed with other people.  It was ::gasp:: FUN!
Posted by Joy2611[/QUOTE]

ditto this.  I invited my OOT relatives' kids because they are my family and I love their children and would love to have them there...however none of them are bringing their kids because its more affordable for them to leave them with a friend then to play for 5 plane tickets, hotel etc.... but serisouly people do not need to bring their children everywhere...

JennaV26

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_puke-guts-out?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:e9de156d-f768-4c46-910d-99b0dfef30c9Post:6e1a8c91-84c2-443c-9d0e-9c03a598a1d9">Re: Puke my guts out.</a>:
[QUOTE]I know it's not an end all.  I'm sure some parents will come without their kids.  I'm more just pointing out that she actually said that.  Wouldn't you side-eye one of your friends if they said "I'm inviting all these people without their kids so that they don't come but hopefully will still send $$"?  You totally would.  posted by marissa_claire[/QUOTE]

My FIL actually tried to convince me and my parents to increase our guest list by suggesting he wanted to "invite people who wouldn't come but would send money." I'm zero surprised.

We didn't invite children to our wedding. It's not that I don't like kids, it's that I didn't trust some people to take their kids out of the chapel if they started screaming.