Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests?

LisaChris2011

I'd like to share my wedding website with coworkers, however they are not invited to my wedding.  Is that ok to do so, or only share with those I'm inviting and/or with those that ask?  Does sharing my website say "look at what you're not invited to?"  Thank you.

kcscejal

Why would you want to share your wedding website with people not invited to the wedding? The website is meant to provide important information to guests of the wedding.

LisaChris2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_proper-share-wedding-website-non-invited-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:ec057ae4-181a-4074-8abe-51830bc4d6c7Post:89d63aa7-fecf-492d-bc0f-783c2a812e3f">Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests?</a>:
[QUOTE]Why would you share it with them? 
Posted by kikibaby[/QUOTE]

Well for any reason brides share anything wedding-related to anyone: because we're excited, happy, proud, joyful, etc. 

FutureMrsTR

I don't think they care if they see it or not.  So no, don't share it, that would be rude.

squirrly

If they ASK, maybe.  But you need to be clear that they're not invited to the wedding since the audience of the site is your guests.

kcscejal

I only really talk about anything wedding related with people who are invited. Maybe I'm  just not excited enough.  Sometimes people who aren't invited will ask me how planning is going, but I don't go into specifics.

shortee426

I'm not freely handing out my url to people who aren't invited to the wedding.  However, if someone ASKS me I will tell them.  I politely tell them that it is mainly information for invited guests, but they are still welcome to browse it if they wish.

stellaella

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_proper-share-wedding-website-non-invited-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ec057ae4-181a-4074-8abe-51830bc4d6c7Post:89d63aa7-fecf-492d-bc0f-783c2a812e3f">Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests?</a>:
[QUOTE]Why would you share it with them? 
Posted by kikibaby[/QUOTE]

<div>+1</div>

LisaChris2011

In Response to Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests?:
[QUOTE]I only really talk about anything wedding related with people who are invited. Maybe I'm  just not excited enough.  Sometimes people who aren't invited will ask me how planning is going, but I don't go into specifics.
Posted by kcscejal[/QUOTE]

This has been what I've been doing too, and the coworkers I'd share the website with would be the same ones that ask all the time about how my planning is going. 

opalsky007

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_proper-share-wedding-website-non-invited-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ec057ae4-181a-4074-8abe-51830bc4d6c7Post:ddd5dacd-cd31-4755-8ca9-682cb64050f2">Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests? : Well for any reason brides share anything wedding-related to anyone: because we're excited, happy, proud, joyful, etc. 
Posted by LisaChris2011[/QUOTE]

It just doesn't seem like something appropriate to show off. If you're excited, you show off your engagement ring. You don't show someone where to book a hotel they won't be staying in, or how to RSVP to a dinner they won't be eating.

Trust me, this is not only impolite, but a bad idea. If you start showing that off, people may start thinking they're invited when they're not. If you don't think that's a big deal, read some of the recent posts about pushy coworkers demanding to know where their invites are.

aegrish

I would understand why you want to share it (even with not invited co workers), because it tell how you met, how you proposed, about your backgrounds etc, but it usually does also contain guest specific information tha may make them feel left out or worse make them think that they'll be invited.  A couple of co-workers at my place ASKED to see my wedding website and I let them even though theyre not invited, i felt bad saying 'oh it's for guests only'.  What i did tho was make a photo book of our e-pics that has how we met, how he proposed etc, printed in it to share with people that may not see the wedding website or aren't invited.

aegrish

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_proper-share-wedding-website-non-invited-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:ec057ae4-181a-4074-8abe-51830bc4d6c7Post:ddd5dacd-cd31-4755-8ca9-682cb64050f2">Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests? : Well for any reason brides share anything wedding-related to anyone: because we're excited, happy, proud, joyful, etc. 
Posted by LisaChris2011[/QUOTE]

Love!

kikibaby

I get that you're excited, but honestly... I doubt your co-workers are even that interested in your wedding, especially if they're not invited.  You could show them pics of the venue or your dress or whatever if they ask specifically.

annakb8

If they want to see it they can probably find it on their own. All the need to do is put your name in the search thingy on the knot's homepage.

hlq2011

Jeez, I'm not even sure most of my invited guests are that interested in my wedding web site.

aegrish

personally I love wedding websites! or well done ones at least.

kikibaby

And really, when I ask someone I'm not super-close to how their wedding planning is going... it's just idle chit-chat about something big in their lives.  It doesn't mean I'm like "OMG!  I want a slideshow of your lives together and to know all the details about your cake and flowers!"

The Mel and Todd Show

<p>In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_proper-share-wedding-website-non-invited-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:ec057ae4-181a-4074-8abe-51830bc4d6c7Post:efa3c537-bdb1-440c-b689-2714a5606b6d">Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests? : I think you took my words out of context (which happens frequently on this board). I never said I go around handing out the book, but when people ask to see our engagement photos its a nice to have to show them. especially older people who love that kind of thing.  trust me i'm the last person to go around flaunting my wedding planning or engagement.  and actually a lot of my guests have commented on how helpful the website is (since we're having a DW) and how much like the pictures, stories, etc. I'm sure not EVERY guest logged on or loved it, but there has been a really good response from it.
Posted by aegrish[/QUOTE]

Here's your context:

<em>What i did tho was make a photo book of our e-pics that has how we met, how he proposed etc, printed in it to share with people that may not see the wedding website or aren't invited.

</em>I'm not saying your guests haven't enjoyed your bio, and I agree that it can be helpful for a DW.  But I can't possibly be the only cynical co-worker in the world who would start muttering about the ten minutes you just took from my life with your pictures as soon as you were out of earshot.  Sometimes people are just trying to be nice.  Let's roleplay.  We work together, okay?

Me (to be kind) How's wedding planning?
You: It's great!  Getting so much done!  So excited!
Me (trying to end the conversation) That's great, I'm happy for you.  I'd love to see pictures sometime (empty gesture that most people would reply to with an empty promise)</p><p>You: It just so happens that I have an ENGAGMENT BOOK printed out for just such an occasion.  Here we are by a tree!  Here we are peeking around the tree!  Look at our passionate embrace!</p><p>Me: Hey, do you need a refill on that coffee?  </p>

laladypoet

doesn't my menu sound good? doesn't my venue look fun? it will be, but you'll never know. sorry.

laladypoet

*pulls out straightjacket*

oh. not that kind of role play?

kikibaby

Mel:  Saying what I want to say in funnier ways since 2010.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_proper-share-wedding-website-non-invited-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ec057ae4-181a-4074-8abe-51830bc4d6c7Post:9fa38212-80eb-489b-90fa-aeba35bab478">Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests?</a>:
[QUOTE]I get that you're excited, but honestly... I doubt your co-workers are even that interested in your wedding, especially if they're not invited.  <strong>You could show them pics of the venue or your dress or whatever if they ask specifically.</strong>
Posted by kikibaby[/QUOTE]

This. My coworker's son is getting married and she wanted to see my dress and know what store I went to. Her FDIL went to that store and found a great dress, so I was excited. But I wouldnt' have AWed it out.

Another coworker asked about pictures and I sent her a link to the abbreviated version of our wedding pics. That's all.

LisaChris2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_proper-share-wedding-website-non-invited-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:ec057ae4-181a-4074-8abe-51830bc4d6c7Post:3ba59c68-de72-4e66-8568-50bc53a95f12">Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests? : Here's your context: What i did tho was make a photo book of our e-pics that has how we met, how he proposed etc, printed in it to share with people that may not see the wedding website or aren't invited. I'm not saying your guests haven't enjoyed your bio, and I agree that it can be helpful for a DW.  But I can't possibly be the only cynical co-worker in the world who would start muttering about the ten minutes you just took from my life with your pictures as soon as you were out of earshot.  Sometimes people are just trying to be nice.  Let's roleplay.  We work together, okay? Me (to be kind) How's wedding planning? You: It's great!  Getting so much done!  So excited! Me (trying to end the conversation) That's great, I'm happy for you.  I'd love to see pictures sometime (empty gesture that most people would reply to with an empty promise) You: It just so happens that I have an ENGAGMENT BOOK printed out for just such an occasion.  Here we are by a tree!  Here we are peeking around the tree!  Look at our passionate embrace! Me: Hey, do you need a refill on that coffee? 
Posted by The Mel and Todd Show[/QUOTE]

Ouch.  Gosh.

laladypoet

mel, I think you spilled coffee on her. apologize.

The Mel and Todd Show

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_proper-share-wedding-website-non-invited-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:ec057ae4-181a-4074-8abe-51830bc4d6c7Post:e06ac80b-5166-4016-8d92-6262f61039df">Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests? : Ouch.  Gosh.
Posted by LisaChris2011[/QUOTE]

None of my responses were directed to you, OP.  No ouch.  No gosh.  You're fine. 

The Mel and Todd Show

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_proper-share-wedding-website-non-invited-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:ec057ae4-181a-4074-8abe-51830bc4d6c7Post:0ded74c3-41a0-4b88-98f5-50ac0e1639cc">Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests?</a>:
[QUOTE]mel, I think you spilled coffee on her. apologize.
Posted by laladypoet[/QUOTE]

I wasn't AIMING for her. 

laladypoet

then why was it "spilled" out of a squirt gun?

The Mel and Todd Show

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_proper-share-wedding-website-non-invited-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:ec057ae4-181a-4074-8abe-51830bc4d6c7Post:a1cd6d58-ff2c-44e8-a17d-8f4c544ddc10">Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests?</a>:
[QUOTE]then why was it "spilled" out of a squirt gun?
Posted by laladypoet[/QUOTE]

That's how I drink my coffee.  Don't judge me. 

kikibaby

I have a feeling that The Mel and Lala Show is one I would pay to watch.

The Mel and Todd Show

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_proper-share-wedding-website-non-invited-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:ec057ae4-181a-4074-8abe-51830bc4d6c7Post:e81b671e-acf7-4520-8fb6-1e86fc2d23e7">Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests?</a>:
[QUOTE]I have a feeling that The Mel and Lala Show is one I would pay to watch.
Posted by kikibaby[/QUOTE]

I PMd you my paypal.  Pay up. 

laladypoet

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_proper-share-wedding-website-non-invited-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ec057ae4-181a-4074-8abe-51830bc4d6c7Post:897fa745-de9c-4cfd-b8db-087236738881">Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Proper to share wedding website with non-invited guests? : That's how I drink my coffee.  Don't judge me. 
Posted by The Mel and Todd Show[/QUOTE]
fair enough. but the bear suit is a little much. unless it's what you're planning to wear to your wedding. if that's the case, tell me allllll about it.