WR: Dress Code issues with Black Tie Preferred

lpstl

Cew FTW!

Bec, can I be one of your evil flying monkeys?

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wr-dress-code-issues-black-tie-preferred?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:edbbc14a-b4d3-4bd7-9c3f-f617c0110c93Post:e59bdfa0-5b2f-4b2f-920c-85e2e0b0f869">Re: WR: Dress Code issues with Black Tie Preferred</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: WR: Dress Code issues with Black Tie Preferred : I call the green witch! And I'll see you at dinner! (yep, that was me, inviting myself to your wedding/cocktail battle to the death/dinner because I'll win.
Posted by BecW2be[/QUOTE]

I was going to invite you anyway, but you're crazy if you think you get to pick which character. I already have you down as this guy:


<a href="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/1/12/315e9ad3-2bd8-4759-8cd6-738b69426509.large.jpg" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', '315e9ad3-2bd8-4759-8cd6-738b69426509', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));" class="PhotoLink"><img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/1/12/315e9ad3-2bd8-4759-8cd6-738b69426509.medium.jpg" alt="" /></a>

suzie173

I know this venue and it does require at least black tie optional. If you change the website info like you said, I'm sure the guests will be okay with it. Family and friends love and know you well and something as small as a web post wouldn't judge or change their opinion of you if they truly know your heart and what you intended. As a guest of close to 50 weddings, I always ask the bride what she hopes to see at her big day and try to dress accordingly as a way of honoring her. My MOH's husband is jealous that he is not in the wedding party, so he regularly brings up the wedding and mocks the men in the WP because they will be donning kilts, and tries to get under my skin by repeating his intent to wear his usual cargo shorts and t-shirt. Initially I joked it up but as time wears on I've had to tell him to consider respect for the couple before he gets dressed that day. He shot back that HIS comfort was his only concern that day (June isn't that hot in Atlantic Canada!).My MOH eventually had to put him "in his place" and told him that the BRIDE"S comfort should take priority and get over himself. He hasn't brought it up since. (Good thing, since my fiancee also has had enough and was on the verge of commenting that he wouldn't be so warm if he wasn't over 400 lbs.! Dodged a bullet there!).

NuggetBrain

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wr-dress-code-issues-black-tie-preferred?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:edbbc14a-b4d3-4bd7-9c3f-f617c0110c93Post:d186d81d-2f0a-4fc1-bff2-bc79a2ffba31">Re: WR: Dress Code issues with Black Tie Preferred</a>:
[QUOTE]I know this venue and it does require at least black tie optional. If you change the website info like you said, I'm sure the guests will be okay with it. Family and friends love and know you well and something as small as a web post wouldn't judge or change their opinion of you if they truly know your heart and what you intended. As a guest of close to 50 weddings, I always ask the bride what she hopes to see at her big day and try to dress accordingly as a way of honoring her. My MOH's husband is jealous that he is not in the wedding party, so he regularly brings up the wedding and mocks the men in the WP because they will be donning kilts, and tries to get under my skin by repeating his intent to wear his usual cargo shorts and t-shirt. Initially I joked it up but as time wears on I've had to tell him to consider respect for the couple before he gets dressed that day. He shot back that HIS comfort was his only concern that day (June isn't that hot in Atlantic Canada!).My MOH eventually had to put him "in his place" and told him that the BRIDE"S comfort should take priority and get over himself. He hasn't brought it up since. (Good thing, since my fiancee also has had enough and was on the verge of commenting that he wouldn't be so warm if he wasn't over 400 lbs.! Dodged a bullet there!).
Posted by suzie173[/QUOTE]

You sound like a prissy twat, and your fiance sounds like a condensending d*ckhead. And he's probably thrilled he's not in the wedding because, honestly, who wants to stand up for a couple where the bride could give a rip about anybody's comfort but her own and the groom wants to inform you of just how fat he thinks you are.  Just saying.

Sburrou

I find nothing wrong with your explanation. A suggestion never hurt anyone.

MayDay513

Sburrou said:

I find nothing wrong with your explanation. A suggestion never hurt anyone.

Please check the date of the thread before responding. This thread is almost 4 years OLD!

Viczaesar

For the love of holey knickers, STOP WITH THE ZOMBIE THREADS!

RebeccaB88

@KnotPorscha, this is why tech needs to get their asses on this zombie thread thing. 4 years old, and brought up to do nothing but stir up trouble among members. What do we have to do to light a fire under tech?

@Sburrou - so how long did it take you to scroll back into the boards and dig up this relic?  Did you even bother to pay attention to the date on it? 

WinstonsGirl

I'm tempted to bring up the first ever post from TK if I can find it.  But I don't actually care enough to go to the trouble

MayDay513

I have noticed a lot of these posts are being brought back by newbies. I think that is happening is they are searching for topics and these old threads are coming up and they will respond not realizing the threads aren't active.

NYCMercedes

Found one FIVE years old for @winstonsgirl. http://forums.theknot.com/discussion/286109/starting-my-period-on-my-wedding-day#latest

WinstonsGirl

@NYCMercedes - You're awesome.  

JoanE2012

huynhette said:

I have noticed a lot of these posts are being brought back by newbies. I think that is happening is they are searching for topics and these old threads are coming up and they will respond not realizing the threads aren't active.

This.  It's always happened.  We just never saw the replies because the old format of TK sorted by thread creation date.  The new format put in place a couple month ago sorts by last reply.

OliveOilsMom

I think since the search function actually works now, since in the old format searching sucked, that is why the zombie threads are reappering. 

ETA: I would love to see a newbie be given this advice today!  There is no way the newbs we have today would have even come back to respond in this thread!

ceceibson

First, I would have never selected a venue that had a ridiculous dress code.  If, in fact, OP's does. Which I doubt.  Second, if I got an invitation with that dress code nonsense, was referred to a website with it or otherwise got wind of it, I would decline the invitation.  I damn near 50 years old. I don't need to be told how to dress.  And, third, if I arrived at the OP's venue and was denied entry due to my dress, I would send the OP a bill for my time, travel and wardrobe.

This cannot possibly be real. Actually, I'm pretty sure it is. Which makes me very, very sad.

klbrengle

ca_surfergirl said:

Hi Everyone,

 

I have sent out an email with our wedding website to all of our guests.  My FL got a call from his mother last night saying that she does not think everyone, (E.g. some of his family) will follow it and they would show up wearing whatever they wanted to wear.  This is how in is outline with the reception information page, because there was concern the guest not knowing what Black Tied Preferred meant.

 

 

Gentlemen

A traditional tuxedo is the preferred choice of attire for the event.

If you decide not to wear a tuxedo, you may wear a dark suit with a dress shirt and conservative tie.

Ladies

A long, formal gown should be worn if the gentleman accompanying you is wearing a tuxedo.

If the gentleman accompanying you is wearing a dark suit instead of a tuxedo you may consider wearing either a short evening gown or a dinner suit.  

 

 

I wanted “Black Tie” but in the interest of some of our guest went the route of “Black Tie Preferred” so that people would not have to decline the invite because they did not have a Tuxedo or a long formal gown.  I mean we are providing a four course meal with an open bar, the least people could do is wear a suit or a cocktail dress.  If that is not a good point to draw a line with a dress code, I do not know what is.  A wedding we went to this summer (similar group to who will be there from his side) did not have a dress code.  Some people were wearing jeans and tees shirts, while my FI and I were dressed in a suite and cocktail dress. 

 

Proper etiquette indicates if you can afford to follow the dress code you are supposed decline the invite, not complain about it and try to get it changed.  They have five months to find something to wear.  If they do not have a suit/dress why not get one from a thrift store? I can’t believe one or two people are trying to get us to change the wedding , when all of the guest from my side do not have any problems with it.  It just makes me so mad.  

 

 

Is anyone else running into problems with the dress code? How did you solved it?

Rude. Ignorant.

I have run out of complete sentences for this crap.

klbrengle

lyndausvi said:

Black Tie Preferred is okay in my book.

Your description is rude, condescending makes you look like any ass.  You seriously told women how to dress based on their date's suit or tux.  Really?  

For your sake, just take down the description and just leave it Black Tie preferred.

To answer your questionn.  I didn't give a shiit what my guests wore.  Oh and I had four course meal with an open top shelf bar also.

Not singling you out here, but all these Black Tie Lite pretensions are ridiculous. It's black tie or not. If it is, then say so. If it isn't, then indicate the formality by the style of the invitation and your choice of venue. Case closed.

OP your post is still... Rude. Ignorant.

klbrengle

Damn didn't catch the age.