Wedding Etiquette Forum

BRIDAL SHOWER - 2ND WEDDING

It's my second marriage but my fiance's first.  I don't expect anyone to do anything for me because I already had a very nice very big bridal shower given by my mother for my first wedding back in 2009.  I don't want him or his family to feel they can't have something for us, should I just let it be and if they plan one so be it? I feel a little funny doing a bridal registery.  His parents don't have alot of money and I'm not sure if my mother would be eager to throw another shower.....I would be happy with no bridal shower and then if anyone wanted to contribute to our honeymoon that would be great!! But then again you can't really ask people to do that either, LOL!

Thank you!

Re: BRIDAL SHOWER - 2ND WEDDING

  • You can just decline the shower if you want.
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  • If you don't want a shower, decline. If you are ok with it, accept.

    The registry is still good to have for the wedding. Most people I know give money for weddings but it's good to have the option if you know certain people would want to buy  gift.

    There's nothing odd about registering for a second wedding but if you are really uncomfortable, don't.
  • edited January 2012
    Yes, you let it be. Anyone can throw a shower for you- except you or your FI. If someone offers, you can accept. I don't see why his family would think they can't have a shower for you both- it's not like they know how big your first shower was and not that it would matter anyway. If someone offers a shower, and you accept, I'd create a registry so you receive stuff that you and your FI need/want.
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  • If someone thinks you shouldn't get a shower because it's your second wedding, they don't have to attend.

    If you're uncomfortable having a shower, decline any offers.  If you want one and someone offers, that's great!  If you want a shower to make his family happy, but don't want to appear greedy to the guests who gave you gifts the first time, maybe you can modify the guest list and not invite anyone who attended the first shower (I think family can be an exception).
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  • Great, thank you everyone!
  • You could accept a shower from your FI's side, if one is offered.  Just limit the guest list to mostly his family and maybe your mom, any sisters/SILs. 

    But if you are feeling very uncomfortable, then politely decline.
  • If someone offers to throw you a shower, and you really don't want one, then you can decline it.

    I just hope that you don't feel as though you *can't* have a shower because you were married previously.  Because you certainly can have one if you want. :-)

  • I will be a first time bride but FI's second marriage.  You might consider having a shower to replace/update items.

    I'm looking mostly for bed/bath linens and perhaps a few other items.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_bridal-shower-2nd-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:f561490c-6c6a-457a-8c55-9495c00a2f22Post:cb5347bb-9b7e-4807-a6d0-7029842e909b">Re: BRIDAL SHOWER - 2ND WEDDING</a>:
    [QUOTE]I will be a first time bride but FI's second marriage.  You might consider having a shower to replace/update items. I'm looking mostly for bed/bath linens and perhaps a few other items.
    Posted by PhoneCardLady[/QUOTE]



    This might be your best idea for a registry if you are uncomfortable. New sheets and towels are always nice
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