Wedding time approriate for tux?

ekutlus

hi there! I just saw a post on another board that made me wonder... what time (actual time) is appropriate for groom and party to wear tuxes? My ceremony is at:   and Fi and his guys are wearing tuxes so I'm just wondering if we made a faux pas.

sarah0725

I think you may have missed typing your ceremony time into your OP, but basically I feel like you should just go with what works best for you. Rules for men's formalwear are much more relaxed than they used to be, and few people outside the Knot's high-scrutiny pressure cooker probably know exactly what they are, anyway. What your FH and his dudes wear is not going to hurt any of your guests, so they should do what they want.

And I'm saying this as somebody who gave in to a FI who is set on wearing a tailcoat to a 10am wedding inside an elephant-shaped building on the beach. Emily Post would eat her hat, but he's pretty set on what he wants, and who cares? He's going to look great.

DeadUtopia

And I come from the opposite spectrum of pp, my groom wants nothing to do with a tux for our evening wedding, (for himself or his grooms men.) They're going with suits which is still acceptable since our wedding isn't super formal, but it just goes to show that the etiquette on men's wear doesn't dictate near as much as it does for ladies.

GeauxTigers17

I won't get into the fact that tuxedos are technically semiformal...(does anyone wear tails anymore?) :P I'm kidding. 

Tuxedos are appropriate beginning at 6pm, as 6pm is the beginning of "evening."

DeadUtopia

I was going to mention morning suits and all that jazz, but it's just confusing lol

ekutlus

lol, thx everyone. Mine starts at 4:30 (since it didn't post in OP) and I'm glad to hear that it really doesn't matter. Unnnfortunately I have a dress with a train...oops. Thanks all! Take care

GeauxTigers17

Sarah - is he wearing a morning suit, or the evening black with white piqué? The former is appropriate for a morning wedding! OK, usually only formal ones, but still....

smokeybailey

My FI is wearing a tux to our 5 pm wedding and my BIL wore a tux to his 1 pm wedding.  No one clutched their pearls or fainted. 

I say, let him wear what he wants.

ekutlus

I do have one guest that I think will be mentioning that my guy and his guys shouldn't be wearing tuxes, that my dress has a train, and that I'm not walking down the aisle to the Wedding March...but I won't have to listen, haha

GeauxTigers17

OK first, there's absolutely nothing wrong, or even non-traditional, with not using the bridal chorus from Lohengrin - many churches don't even allow it. And I wouldn't worry about what people say. Most people don't notice these things!

mustanggoonie

I've been to weddings where the guys have worn tuxes at all times of day.  Do what you want!

almost-a-bride

My guys wore tuxes for my wedding and it started at 5:30 pm.

sarah0725

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wedding-time-approriate-tux?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:fb035c15-7088-4009-9426-88e03b6fb5faPost:a8cfb9fd-9ef8-46e0-86ad-5488502b1944">Re: Wedding time approriate for tux?</a>:
[QUOTE]Sarah - is he wearing a morning suit, or the evening black with white piqué? The former is appropriate for a morning wedding! OK, usually only formal ones, but still....
Posted by GeauxTigers17[/QUOTE]

He's wearing a black tailcoat, but with a red waistcoat, black tie, and top hat. So think more "Victorian gentleman walking about" and less Fred Astaire.

annakb8

Like GeauxTigers said, 6pm is the beginning of evening. And even if your ceremony starts before 6 and goes into the evening you should technically base the dress of of the time the event starts. So technically, if your ceremony is before 6 the men should not wear tuxedos.

That said, barely anyone knows these rules and even fewer people follow them. If your FI really wants to wear a tuxedo at 4 in the afternoon more power to him. If you are truly having a black tie affair however, I wouldn't expect any guests to show up in tuxedos before 6pm. But if you didn't expect everyone to dress in black tie no big deal.

[Deleted User]

My H and all the GM wore tuxes to our 1pm wedding.

GeauxTigers17

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wedding-time-approriate-tux?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:fb035c15-7088-4009-9426-88e03b6fb5faPost:e5353853-ebd0-4bfb-9779-813366adac8f">Re: Wedding time approriate for tux?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Wedding time approriate for tux? : He's wearing a black tailcoat, but with a red waistcoat, black tie, and top hat. So think more "Victorian gentleman walking about" and less Fred Astaire.
Posted by sarah0725[/QUOTE]

I think that sounds really fun! My FI is wearing full dress tails with the white piqué coat because he just wanted to. I'm wearing a ball gown so he wanted to wear tails. His Best Man is all excited about it and asked me if he could wear a top hat and cane to the reception and I told him to be my guest, haha. 

Calypso1977

i feel that clothing should be determined based on the venue rather than the time.

if you are having a fancy country club wedding at noon, a tux is approrpriate.  if you are having a wedding at an elks club or a park at 6pm, a tux is too fancy IMO.

sarah0725

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wedding-time-approriate-tux?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:fb035c15-7088-4009-9426-88e03b6fb5faPost:7670e579-512b-4bb5-ba14-7c77e7af0187">Re: Wedding time approriate for tux?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Wedding time approriate for tux? : I think that sounds really fun! My FI is wearing full dress tails with the white piqué coat because he just wanted to. I'm wearing a ball gown so he wanted to wear tails. His Best Man is all excited about it and asked me if he could wear a top hat and cane to the reception and I told him to be my guest, haha. 
Posted by GeauxTigers17[/QUOTE]

He wanted a walking stick and a monocle, but I told him that I don't want to marry Mr. Peanut, so I think he's going to stop at the top hat. I think people will overall like it, though.

artbyallie

As a PP mentioned, venue comes into play, too. I think OP must have seen my comment on another thread. I do think my aunt's and my FSIL's groomsmen should not have worn tuxes, but they both also had really casual weddings otherwise. As in, 2pm cake and punch for my aunt and 3pm outdoor BBQ for FSIL. The tuxes just looked really out of place to me.

But a lot of people do choose tuxes for non-evening weddings, as mentioned.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wedding-time-approriate-tux?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:fb035c15-7088-4009-9426-88e03b6fb5faPost:d7fa6602-33e2-4ccf-b24d-8ed730f496e9">Re: Wedding time approriate for tux?</a>:
[QUOTE]My guys wore tuxes for my wedding and it started at 5:30 pm.
Posted by almost-a-bride[/QUOTE]


Same here. I mean, we had an evening dinner reception, it was sort of evening-ish. Also, my BMs wore cocktail dresses, but I think they looked formal enough to match the tuxes. My H wanted a traditional tux with a bow tie.

Beachy730

Our guys wore tuxes for our 3:00 ceremony, and our reception started at 6.  Like Calypso said, I think it has more to do with your venue than the time.  I have always seen tuxes worn at weddings, regardless of them being during the day.

Beachy730

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wedding-time-approriate-tux?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:fb035c15-7088-4009-9426-88e03b6fb5faPost:9bc6dd0d-98a3-495e-9522-7019e502c3cd">Re: Wedding time approriate for tux?</a>:
[QUOTE]Just because you did it, doesn't make it correct.  Tuxedos are called "dinner jackets' everywhere in the world except the USA.  They are for dinnertime semi-formal functions.  6:00 PM is the official time that evening starts, but if your celebration is a tiny bit earlier, and continues into the late evening, then tuxedos would be acceptable.  The correct formal wear for daytime would be a cutaway coat (with tails!) and striped trousers. This is what is correct.  If you choose to break these rules, then that is your choice, but it is not correct.  You didn't see any tuxedos at the Royal Wedding until after 6:00, did you?
Posted by CMGr[/QUOTE]

<div>You're right, because the Royal Wedding is sooooo similar to the average American wedding.  </div><div>
</div><div>I'm a firm believer in just because you did it doesn't mean it's right.  But I'm also a firm believer that you shouldn't make your WP pay for 2 outfits.  We had a formal reception, so they wore tuxes.  This is a rule that so few people know that I think it's a perfectly acceptable one to break.</div><div>
</div><div>And the difference between this rule and other etiquette rules is that you aren't going to hurt anyone's feelings or offend anyone by wearing a tux during the day.  </div>

cassandrae913

We are doing tuxes for our 2.30 ceremony and later reception. I really struggled with this since I know it is too early. However, it is not the royal wedding and we are not making people change. Since the event is a formal sit down dinner that goes until 11 pm at night in a formal venue, I decided that tuxes overall would be better, even though the ceremony is before 6 pm.
I also did not want a 3 hour break, so we are starting cocktails earlier as well. I have been stressed out about it the whole time, but I figure the SF Opera and Symphony Opening Night Galas are black tie and start at 4.30-5, we can do black tie that early as the do

klm03013

We are having a 10:30 am ceremony. FI has his heart set on tuxes. I figure, let him do what he wants. Nobody is going to care.