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and guest?

So we've been getting RSVPs back with "Mr. Smith & guest" attending. When it gets closer to the date are we supposed to call them and find out the name of the person they plan on bringing to put on the place card or just 'and guest' them the day of?

Re: and guest?

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    edited December 2011
    you can do either -- I think it's nicer if the person you invited had the foresight to give the name so that it doesn't appear they are just bringing soemone they picked up off the street. Everyone I invited that was brining a guest I knew who their guest was ahead of time and had already met them and knew the name so it wasn't an issue for me. I guess you can do either depending on how formal you want to be
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    kle0113kle0113 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    You don't have to but I would call them to find out the name its just more personal and imo looks better.
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    edited December 2011
    I think if you know the name of the person, you write it. If you don't, you don't write it. The wedding I went to back in August, my mom was invited with a total party of 3: her, my sister and my brother. She was livid that she didn't get a guest and my sister wanted to bring her bf as well, they've been dating almost 2 years. Anyway, mom responded 3 and guest with the intentions of letting my sister bring her boy and if he didn't come, she was going to bring a friend. Groom called my mom and drama ensued not only to the fact that no one was invited with a guest but also because she couldn't give a name. Sorry for the whole story! lolI'll be avoiding that whole mess all together. If they write and guest, that's what'll be on the seating card.
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    edited December 2011
    I put the name of the guest on the card.  Then 3 days before the wedding I found out my cousin decided to bring someone else.  Not really a big deal, but I felt it would be weird for girl #1's name to be on the card.  Since I had them made professionally made, it was a PITA for me to try to hand make one to look as nice.
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    edited December 2011
    Do the best you can. Like OTHER "Jaime" :p , I wrote "and guest' if it was written on the response card; if it was easy to call, say, my cousin & ask if she wanted me assume she was still seeing her boyfriend ANDY, I called.In that instance, ANDY was out of the picture & "GUS" was in :-/ ... I could have stuck with "and guest" in that case. Again, only do what you have time for!!
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    alliecarrie41alliecarrie41 member
    First Anniversary First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    if your guests don't know who their guests are, 1. that's lame and 2. you are under no obligation to bother finding out their name imo.
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    ChloeMarieChloeMarie member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If they dont think enough of them to refer to them by name, then neither should you. I know that sounds bitchy but Im sure you have a zillion other things to do then start making calls and find out "guests" birth name. ;)
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    mbcdefgmbcdefg member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    If you know it's a steady girlfriend/boyfriend, I would definitely call now and get their names. I've been "And Guest-ed" with FI, even after we were dating 4, 5, 6 years, and it hurt a bit. If they're bringing a random date, I would try to find out. But if they can't give you a name before crunch time or they keep blowing you off, then I wouldn't stress yourself out by trying to track the names down.
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