OK, need major help, renewing vows?

scmakar

My husband is a marine so we got married through the courts but never had an actual ceremony with friends and family, nor reception. I am trying to plan all this but what gets to me is that I need a venue with a refundable deposit, incase of deployment, because our wedding date, what we are aiming for, is Feb 18, 2012. Also who would renew our vows, we had a officient do it for us at city hall, but I am really lost as to how to make this seem like an actual wedding. We are currently in CA because of his duty station is over here. I plan to go back to NJ in the beginning of January to actually start making plans but that will only be for a week. I'm so stuck. Any and all opinions and advice would help (:

cher1980

hey! what is your email?  ill send you some info that can help!

cher1980

or send me a private message w/ your email in case you dont want to post it

mbcdefg

If you are renewing your vows, you don't need to pay for an ordained officiant, so perhaps you could have a friend do it if you know someone good at public speaking. Or, if you're religious, ask your clergyperson to give your marriage a blessing (if you're Catholic maybe you could do a convalidation ceremony).

K&J64

I would be upfront with the venues about why you need a refundable deposit. Make some phone calls of places you see online that you like and see if any are receptive to the idea. Generally speaking you initial deposit is non-refundable but  all payments there after are refundable. The initial deposit to reserve the date is usually around $2,000. Venues make this non-refundable so that if you cancel last minute they're not totally out of money for that date should they be unable to book someone else. Perhaps since you're husband is a marine you'll find someone who's willing to customize a contract for you and make an exception.

Do as much of your leg work online and making phone calls prior to your visit to NJ that way you can have appointments booked to meet with people that week and finalize location etc. Since you're already married you can have whomever you want "officiate" your vow renewal, or no one at all. You could simply have a good friend or relative make a welcome speech and then the two of you can speak. There are no rules, so do whatever feels right : )

Danes983

If you cant get it refunded maybe ask that in your contract they put something like
Incase of military deployment prior to the event, signors will be able to use their deposit toward a new date of the same event. In other words, you wont get the deposit back but you can use it towards the same event when he gets back.