This may fit better on the Etiquette board, but this is the only board I feel comfortable posting on, so here goes...
So our friend offered to host a shower/engagement party for us. The guest list we sent was about 25 people (about half showed). It was small enough to host at her house and it was catered with chicken, mashed potatotes, etc.
Since she did one for us, we thought it would be nice to do something for her, as well. She and her fiance' are getting married the end of June. We thought we could host something at our house if it was similar size to what we had.
Her MOH had already started planning something so we are working with her on it.
Issue is that invite list is already 40 people - so our house is out as we cannot hold that many people here. We then suggested having it at a restaurant where we can rent a room out and have it as a pay your own meal thing.
Issue: friend doesn't like the idea of people paying for their own food, and the MOH tells us that more people are being added to the list. We just cannot afford to pay for 40+ people a dinner at a restaurant or rent out a different place and have it catered.
Not sure what to do... I understand not wanting people to pay for their own food, but we cannot afford to pay for everyone + rent a venue. We cannot fit that many people at our house, either. At what point do we tell her that we just cannot do it now? Or what other suggestions does anyone have in this situation?