Seriously bummed out :(

jcg98

I went to a venue yesterday that I absolutely LOVED.  But it's way out of our price range and I wasn't expecting that.  The woman we met with said that she might be able to present us with options if we let her know our budget.  But I'm not hopeful because the package she quoted had about the same amount of food and amenities that at least two other venues had for almost $8000 less.  Did anyone else have the experience of finding a place you really loved but couldn't afford, and how did you get past that?  Rationally, I know that it really doesn't matter where we get married, because we're getting married!  But I'm still really disappointed.

TuffysMommie

What were some of the elements that you liked about the place? Was it the taste of the food? The look of the ballroom? The location (pretty park, close to beach, etc) 

If you are able to narrow down what specifics you like about that particular location, you can then compare it to similar locations that have similar attributes. 

It might help to post the locations that you did visit - the ones that were "ok" and the one that you love but can't afford. Then, the girls here may be able to suggest locations that are the same look and feel but (hopefully) a lower price.

Good luck!

felicia220

I am so sorry.  But this is where TK can be very helpful.  If you decide to go look at anymore venues post on here first and see if anyone has gotten married there and if they could tell you, about what it costs.  This way you don't go see it and fall in love with something you can't have.  

I am bummed for you, but there are plenty of venues out there to fall in love with that I am sure will be in your price range.  Good luck to you.  

mbcdefg

I haven't been to a ton of weddings (and many of them weren't even in the North Jersey area), but for me they pretty much all blend together. As long as there's good food, free drinks and enough seating, plus good company and decent entertainment, I really doubt your guests are going to care where the wedding is. They'll enjoy it no matter what.

Plus, they will never know what other places you were considering. It's not like they'll be sitting at The Tides and saying, for example, "This is O.K., but if only they'd spent the money on The Venetian instead." 
The only people who are really going to have an idea of whether there are "nicer" venues out there are people who have gotten married in the past, maybe, five years, or people who are currently searching for a reception venue. Or people who attend a ton of weddings every year. I think your average person really isn't going to notice what your venue has and doesn't have when compared to other venues.

And unless all of your guests are from the NYC metro area and attend weddings very often, they won't know the difference anyway ... I had a relatively simple wedding by New Jersey standards, but I had friends in attendance from other parts of the country who were floored by how "fancy" everything was ("A dessert buffet?!?!?! More than five hors d'oeuvres?!?!?! Wine on the tables?!?!?!?! OMG!!!!")

felicia220

mbcdefg- good points!

mchristian05

I would suggest to go with what your budget is.  As long as you have heard good reviews about the place that you ultimately go with...i'm sure you will be super happy in the end.

Lolyalyssa

Can you tell us the places?  The one you want and the one you might go with?

I agree with what the girls have been saying but its hard to give advice in a vaccum.

Totally agree that any NJ wedding will blow away OOT.

mrsdevilguy

While I know everyone says the economy is on the upswing it may not hurt to see if the place you love will work with you. Tell them x is your budget is there anything they can do.  It never hurts to ask - the worst someone can say is no.

bheartsb

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_seriously-bummed-out?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:90Discussion:66cc47ad-2ca3-4c14-93c0-0930fae6674dPost:825175f3-32c6-4df3-89bc-2ba59ad01af9">Re: Seriously bummed out :(</a>:
[QUOTE]I haven't been to a ton of weddings (and many of them weren't even in the North Jersey area), but for me they pretty much all blend together. As long as there's good food, free drinks and enough seating, plus good company and decent entertainment, I really doubt your guests are going to care where the wedding is. They'll enjoy it no matter what. Plus, they will never know what other places you were considering. It's not like they'll be sitting at The Tides and saying, for example, "This is O.K., but if only they'd spent the money on The Venetian instead."  The only people who are really going to have an idea of whether there are "nicer" venues out there are people who have gotten married in the past, maybe, five years, or people who are currently searching for a reception venue. Or people who attend a ton of weddings every year. I think your average person really isn't going to notice what your venue has and doesn't have when compared to other venues. And unless all of your guests are from the NYC metro area and attend weddings very often, they won't know the difference anyway ... I had a relatively simple wedding by New Jersey standards, but I had friends in attendance from other parts of the country who were floored by how "fancy" everything was ("A dessert buffet?!?!?! More than five hors d'oeuvres?!?!?! Wine on the tables?!?!?!?! OMG!!!!")
Posted by mbcdefg[/QUOTE]

HAHA...I love it!  So, true...people from anywhere but here think that we host rather extravagant 'Galas'.  My future in-laws are from Ohio, and when they came for our engagment party (hosted by my parents at a place I call a 'hole in the wall') they were FLOORED by the whole thing.  And I've been to enagagement parties that were basically a mini-wedding.  However, my MIL comented that, this was what a wedding in Findlay would be like.  Our E-party was nice, but far from anything extravagant.  She was floored that there was an open bar, so much food to chose from, AND a cake-that was nothing more than a basic sheet cake, with a nice decoration on it.  But she just thought it was the best, and wondered how we were gonna top it...lol

peaches85

mbcdefg - I heart you!!  Everything you just said puts things into perspective BIG TIME for me!  Occasionally I second guess our venue choice and wish we had mroe money to spend on a nicer place, but you just made perfect sense.  I'm going to "Watch" this thread so that anytime I start doubting our choices or I start feeling bad about our budget, I can get a nice slap in the face of reality and logic!  Thanks!!  :-)

misschristinec

mbcdefg  you are the most practical bride!  Voice of Reason award goes to you!

Back to jcg -

I desperately wanted to get marrried at the Palace @ Somerset Park... but I wouldn't budge on having a Saturday night wedding.  - AND even though I am getting married in JANUARY it's still ridiculously expensive $198 pp (inclusive of tax and grat). 

It's sooo not worth the stress-- the money stress i'm talking about.  We visited a bunch of other venues - and i found one I REALLY liked a lot.. and had a nice pricetag and they were (and have been) sooo amazing to work with! I still know it wasn't my #1 choice.. but that's OK!, because I'm marrying my #1 choice man- and that's all that matters!

jcg98

Thanks everyone for the moral support and practical advice!  I absolutely needed a reality check. 

The place we can't afford that I really liked is Meadow Wood Manor in Randolph.  I just really loved the inside of the building, the entrance hall with double staircase, the separate cocktail hour room with lots of tables and built-in wood-paneled bar, and the beautiful, elegant ballroom, with a smaller room adjacent for the bar and the dessert buffets.  The menu blew me away also.  But at $156 pp (inclusive) for a Friday night in November, minimum 150 ppl, it's just too much.

Our top two contenders are Ravello's and Primavera Regency.  Both offer a similarly lavish menu for a MUCH better price ($110 pp inclusive, 100 ppl min for Ravello's; $116 pp inclusive, 110 ppl min for Primavera).  I'm torn between them because there are things that set each apart for me:

Ravello's: gardens w/fountain, grand staircase, seafood station included, the ridiculous dessert buffet, choice of 2 bakeries for the cake. 

Primavera: closer to church/less likelihood of rush hour traffic being a problem, baby grand piano, 2 bars which open 30 mins early and stay open all night (and have 6 beers on tap! including my fave Blue Moon), and the option of a food tasting before committing.

(sigh)

lynzandgreg

The food at Meadow Wood is EH. And the reception area there is not enough space for everyone to sit. If you get married there the ceremony area is really small if you have a lot of people. One of my best friends got married there and I wouldn't say it was the most amazing venue I have ever been too. Thankfully her entertainment was amazing so that helped a lot. But yea, honestly your not really missing out on much.
Oh and If i remember correctly the majority of the bathrooms are downstairs so if you have older family memebers that cant walk up and down the stairs that maybe a problem.