To invite, or not to invite, this is my question

Danes983

I have 2 people left on our B list (4 invites).  I havent sent the invites out yet but am getting the addresses and things together.  Here is the senario ladies wdyt?

Two of my sorority sisters that I haven't seen in a while.  We used to be close in college and I even lived with one of them, she is my big sister.  The other is someone who when I worked in mid-town we would have lunch together all the time, but then we both got laid off and kind of helped each other through the process.  I have not seen either of these woman in about a year.  We didnt have a falling out, but we are just so busy. We talk on facebook occasionally. They both know I am engaged and getting married soon and one of them I will actually see at the end of this month. I feel bad not inviting them.  I think they would be hurt.  I just dont know what to do.

Also, we are inviting 210 with a 175 min on NYE if that is any help in the decision making.

Heather822

I would invite.
I am not a big supporter of the whole 'B List' concept to begin with. I think it has the potential to be disastrous, and could result in a lot of hurt feelings.
Secondly, a 175 minimum of NYE might be tough to obtain... Seems like right now you only left room for 35 people (roughly just 17 couples) to say now. That's not much less than the standard 10% that usually say no ~ to a NON Holiday wedding. I think your rate 'No' rate will probably turn out to be higher, so the more people you invite the better.

Good luck!

jrgoogrl

I agree. I would invite them. Like you said, you didn't have a falling out, life just happens sometimes and you don't get to see/talk to people you were once close with.

rutgersgirl82

I'd say invite them. Plus if they don't want to come they won't. They can decide. Doesn't sound like you'd mind having them there so I'd say go for it. 

kwilkinson14

I would agree and invite them to the wedding. In their minds they may be expecting an invite and this will prevent any awkward conversations and hurt feelings. Four people isn't a huge number to add to the guest list. Besides the fact that it being NYE may prevent some people from attending the wedding. Good luck!

ffbride_0813

I would invite them.

demarcosjd

I would invite them. I regret not inviting one of my sorority sisters. Same thing we hadn't seen each other in awhile and now one of my other sorority sisters is getting married and I've seen her a lot now. We were also 4 ppl under our minimum so it wouldn't have been a big deal if we invited her.

clarereedy

I completely agree with the previous posts.  New Year's Eve could lead to a higher rate of people declining.  You only have room for 35 no responses.  Worse case, you invite them and they can't come.  Best case, they come and you get to see two friends you haven't seen in a long time.  If it were fifteen or twenty people on your B-list, I might have a different response, but for four, just send the invite.  You'd hate for someone to feel slighted or to hurt their feelings since they were very good friends to you at one point. 

Lola Minnie

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_invite-not-invite-this-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:90Discussion:74af6e41-ecc2-4095-9437-20193c22303aPost:b0341240-d6d5-41ff-869a-2f79ff9f830d">Re: To invite, or not to invite, this is my question</a>:
[QUOTE]I would invite. I am not a big supporter of the whole 'B List' concept to begin with. I think it has the potential to be disastrous, and could result in a lot of hurt feelings. Secondly, a 175 minimum of NYE might be tough to obtain... Seems like right now you only left room for 35 people (roughly just 17 couples) to say now. That's not much less than the standard 10% that usually say no ~ to a NON Holiday wedding. I think your rate 'No' rate will probably turn out to be higher, so the more people you invite the better. Good luck!
Posted by Heather822[/QUOTE]

Agree. I don't like B list either.  Either invite everyone you want or trim down your list.

And also agree with Heather about NYE statement

akmackay

Invite! Agree with everyone that you will have more No's than normal since it's NYE and it's only 4 more people- I would definitely invite

TuffysMommie

I support the "invite them" thought.  If they think "Why did she invite me?" then they will just decline. It can't hurt.  Are either of them married? Would you want to be invited to either of their weddings? Would you be hurt if you weren't invited? 

If you have the space and want to include them, then you might as well do it.

cvl105

what's another 4 people?! I say invite them.

kasabby

I guess I don't even have to say it after all the PP's but I say Invite them!

Danes983

Thanks Ladies.  It is NYE, but I think I am going to have the opposite problem.  We already have 40 hotel rooms booked and  the invites have not even gone out yet.

njpabzy

agree with PP - invite!

diamondx423

agree with pp about inviting. if one of my littles didn't invite me to her wedding i'd be really mad about it.

teacup0618

I would invite them too!

Reilly626

Invite them, I kicked around the A B list, but didnt do it, sent out 160, and 120 are coming (where we wanted to be in the end).  Good luck!

jchristel

Not that you need another post saying "invite them" but... I had a lot of people not rsvp with their +1, had I known this was going to happen, we would have invited more people.  We'll make our minimum, but we were expecting 200 and we'll only have around 180, there are definitely people I would have invited if I had known that.

Danes983

Jcristel-
This seems to be reoccurring, I just dont know what to do about the plus ones. Everyone says they wont bring, but its NYE and I think everyone wants to bring someone, thats why we are so worried about the 4 people.  I swear guest list is the worst part.