mother-daughter dance

asweet21

I saw on another board a bride is planning to do a mother-daughter dance, as well as a father-daughter dance, because she is very close with her mother.  I saw this and thought this would be a good idea because I am very close with my mother.  Both my father and mother will be walking me down the aisle (as of right now), so I figured why not dance with my mother too.  I am not close with my father at all, but I feel I have to dance with him and have him walk me down the aisle for status quo purposes, even though I really don’t want to.  I feel I have to make it look good in order to keep him happy at my wedding because if anyone questions or makes a comment as to why we didn’t he will get mad and make my wedding miserable for me.  A dance with my mother would be much more meaningful to both of us, but it is not the norm.  I was wondering what everyone else thought of this?  Is it too unusual?  Have you seen it done before?

mbcdefg

I've seen it done before, everyone at that wedding thought it was sweet, and I very much doubt that anyone will be sitting at your wedding and thinking it's stupid.

The only thing about special dances at a wedding that bothers me is when they're very long, and/or there are a lot of them. "First I'll dance with my dad for a special five-minute song. Then my mom for another five minutes. Then my two older brothers. Then my uncle who helped raise me. Then my grandpa and step-grandpa. Etc. etc. etc."

tstrayer27

I've seen it done where the bride had a father-daughter dance and also a mother-daughter dance. I think it's becoming more common and I personally see nothing wrong with it. My father is no longer alive so I would dance with my mother (which is obv a little different from you). I really would prefer to cut those dances our of ours however as I don't want all that attention on me and would rather just enjoy spending time with everyone.

GolfChick78

It's certainly not the norm.  I've never seen it done, but it sounds like a sweet idea.  There's no reason not to do it, especially if it will give you one of the more significant moments of your wedding day.

asweet21

Thanks everyone for your thoughts.  I wish I could get rid of the mother-son/father-daughter dances, but my FMIL is looking forward to her dance with my fiance and I don't want to take that away from her.  This mother-daughter dance is definitely a possibility now.  It will make the night more special for me, since my father-daughter dance is really just for show.  No one will really care about my that dance except my father and whoever is at his table because everyone else knows I don't want to do it. 

shoebie

never seen it done before 

goaliegirl

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_mother-daughter-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:90Discussion:bbcc3a57-05f1-42cb-8e60-17b3432c7bd4Post:f2a9d50d-45df-42a3-a9c3-1fe7bd7c329b">Re: mother-daughter dance</a>:
[QUOTE]I've seen it done before, everyone at that wedding thought it was sweet, and I very much doubt that anyone will be sitting at your wedding and thinking it's stupid. The only thing about special dances at a wedding that bothers me is when they're very long, and/or there are a lot of them. "First I'll dance with my dad for a special five-minute song. Then my mom for another five minutes. Then my two older brothers. Then my uncle who helped raise me. Then my grandpa and step-grandpa. Etc. etc. etc."
Posted by mbcdefg[/QUOTE]

I agree with MB.....I have seen it done before a few times.   But like she said, sometimes all the special dances get a little long and drawn out and your guests start talking and stop paying attention.   Maybe you can pick shorter songs or just play a portion of each song to keep it a little shorter but still have the opportunity to dance with both.

kristen8040

I don't think it's a bad idea, but I'd just one song and split it between the two of them.

rutgersgirl82

I did it and it meant the world to me!!!! (and my mom). My mom and I are extremely close, and I now treasure the pictures and memories I have of dancing with her at our wedding. I did the father/daughter dance, but it def did not mean as much to me, I'm nowhere near as close with my dad. It was more for show. 

My mom and I danced to the song "Somebody's Hero" By Jamie O'Neal, the lyrics, the beat, everything was perfect, we danced around and it was an upbeat song with absolutely beautiful lyrics such meaningful words, esp to us! 

I also did a short dance with my Dad (not the full song) and cut the song with my mom I think about 2 1/2 minutes in after the verse about the Daughters wedding 

This is the video on youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1_uMQTw7v2g

I say do what is important to you! I would not have wanted to miss out on dancing with my mom!!!

asweet21

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_mother-daughter-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:90Discussion:bbcc3a57-05f1-42cb-8e60-17b3432c7bd4Post:6f2fc140-7de2-400e-ab57-9da80ee778de">Re: mother-daughter dance</a>:
[QUOTE]I did it and it meant the world to me!!!! (and my mom). My mom and I are extremely close, and I now treasure the pictures and memories I have of dancing with her at our wedding. I did the father/daughter dance, but it def did not mean as much to me, I'm nowhere near as close with my dad. It was more for show.  My mom and I danced to the song "Somebody's Hero" By Jamie O'Neal, the lyrics, the beat, everything was perfect, we danced around and it was an upbeat song with absolutely beautiful lyrics such meaningful words, esp to us!  I also did a short dance with my Dad (not the full song) and cut the song with my mom I think about 2 1/2 minutes in after the verse about the Daughters wedding  This is the video on youtube  <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1_uMQTw7v2g" rel='nofollow'>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1_uMQTw7v2g</a> I say do what is important to you! I would not have wanted to miss out on dancing with my mom!!!
Posted by rutgersgirl82[/QUOTE]

Awe! Thanks! That really helps me! I will look at the video later when I am home (I'm at work now).  Weddings really do not highlight the mother of the bride at all and I really want my mom to feel special, she deserves it! 

PrettyGirl815

I saw it done once- it was very special. I do believe the circumstances may have been different from yours.  If you don't want to have too many dances at once, you could separate the mother daughter dance and save it towards the cake-cutting or another special time at the reception.

Please remember that this is your wedding--so do not worry what guests will think it's weird (and i don't think any will, to tell you the truth). Do what you want. You get one day to celebrate with your family and FI. Follow your heart and go for it!

lucyslove

I did this at my wedding since my dad is not a dancer and my mom loves it!!  It was a surprise and she loved it, it is one of my favorite moments from the reception.  We danced to Isn't She Lovely by Stevie Wonder.  

JuJuBee541

I am also planning a mother-daughter dance.... unfortunately, my father will not be at my wedding, and my mother and I are extremely close.  However, it will be a surprise to her! I have seen it done before and I was pretty sure there wasn't a dry eye in the house! I just wanted to do some sort of tribute to my mom at the reception... I don't think anyone would find it stupid to wanna thank and honor my mom for a few minutes during the reception!

asweet21

Thank you all so very much for your advice.  I am going to do it and just make sure the other songs are short or not play them all the way through.  I know I have to realize this is mine and my fiance's wedding and I don't need to please anyone else but myself.  It is so hard though when everyone gives me there opinion, no matter if I ask or not.  My sister is the worst, she is my MOH, but if I say something about my wedding and she doesn't like it she makes me feel like it is the worst idea ever, even if I liked it (but that is another posting... haha).  Thanks again for your advice and thoughts!!

srragin77

I have never seen it done, but I plan to have a mother-daughter dance, and it will also be a surprise to her.  My father passed away, and my brother will be walking me down the aisle.  So, I will play a brief tribute to my father and then it will lead into a dance with my mother.

My advice to you....do what makes you happy!