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invitation wording - one set of parents helping to pay

Hi Girls,

We've been having trouble deciding how to word our invitations.  We're paying for the majority of our wedding but my parents are paying for close to half.  If we use the following, then it looks like my parents are paying for the whole thing.

Mr. and Mrs.
request the honor of your presence of the marriage of their daughter
me
to
FI
son of ...

I don't want to use, "together with their parents", because the future in-laws are not helping with the wedding, they're hosting our rehearsal dinner so those invites will indicate that.

Is it tacky to do

Mr. and Mrs.
together with their daughter and future son-in-law
me
and
FI
son of...

And do we even need to put his parent's name on the invite with the "son of"

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you!!

Re: invitation wording - one set of parents helping to pay

  • Options
    edited December 2011
    Is it tacky to do

    Mr. and Mrs.
    together with their daughter and future son-in-law
    me
    and
    FI
    son of...

    I think that's weird.  I would just put your parents as the hosts if you don't want to put together with their parents...

    Or maybe something like Together with the Bride's parents, Jane and John invite you etc
    ~Chelsea~
    image
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    BabyFruit Ticker
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    edited December 2011
    Ugh, I had a huge rant about this a few weeks back..

    I think its terrible when people feel the need to show who's paying on the invites. It's NO ONE's business. I would say just do the first one and don't worry about it. I mean, do you really need everyone to KNOW you're paying?
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    jchristeljchristel member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think it all depends on your relationship, but from what you said, 

    Mr. and Mrs.
    request the honor of your presence 
    at the marriage of their daughter
    me 
    to 
    FI
    son of ...

    seems to be the best option.  Is it bad if your parents get all of the "credit" for hosting?  
    Photobucket
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    edited December 2011
    I would just use the first one. The second option sounds really awkward.

    image
    Tara & Jose 10.17.10
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    Danes983Danes983 member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I would just do the old school traditional way.

    Jane and John Smith
    request the honor of your presence for the wedding of
    Bride Smith
    to Groom Blah

    Thats it. None of the grooms names.
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    mbcdefgmbcdefg member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    The invites don't indicate who is paying. They indiciate who is HOSTING, which means the people who are making the arrangements and taking care of the guests. Your wedding invitation should not be used as a, "Hey, here's who paid for your dinner!" commentary.

    We put "Together with their parents" even though we're paying for the bulk of it, mainly to keep the invite less wordy. My parents contributed a portion, and his dad isn't in a position where he can help out financially. Had we decided to list our parents' names, we would've included his dad's name even though he didn't pay for anything.

    I would suggest that your FI talk to his folks and see what they want. IMO it'd be really unnecessary to leave them off the invite simply to show that your parents are paying and they are not. But they may be O.K. with not being on the invite because "traditionally" the invite is issued from the bride's parents.

    Are you doing a separate reception card? if so, maybe a compromise would be:

    Wedding Invite:
    Lburke Anne Bride
    daughter of Mr. and Mrs. John Bride
    and
    FI Henry Groom
    son of Mr. and Mrs. Harold Groom
    request the pleaseure of your company
    as they exchange marriage vows
    etc.

    Reception card:
    Mr. and Mrs. John Bride
    cordinally invite you to a reception
    honoring the new
    Mr. and Mrs. FI and LBurke Groom
    time, location

    Rehearsal dinner card:
    Mr. and Mrs. Harold Groom
    cordially invite you to a rehearsal dinner
    on the eve of the marriage of
    Lburke Bride and FI Groom
    date, time, place
    image
  • Options
    edited December 2011
    We issued the invitation from my parents, did not list "son of" and did not bother to indicate in any way that we and my parents were all contributing to the wedding, but it's all a matter of personal taste.
    Photobucket
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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    felicia220felicia220 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My parents are hosting the whole wedding and my FMIL is hosting the rehearsal dinner.  I decided to put 

    Mr. and Mrs. (MOM and DAD) & Mrs. (FMIL) Requests your presence at the marriage of their children
    Me
    to
    FI

    We decided that we didn't care who people thought were paying for it, we wanted to acknowledge both sets of parents.  With that being said, I understand why you want people to know you are paying for the wedding as well.  And I think that  
    Mr. and Mrs.
    together with their daughter and future son-in-law
    me 
    and 
    FI
    son of...

    Works well for your situation, and in no way is tacky.  But I do think you need to put his parents names on the invite, it would be weird if they weren't on it and may make them feel bad.  Its the right thing to do.  
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    felicia220felicia220 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    And FYI traditional, whomever is hosting the Wedding is paying the bill.  
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    uppereastgirluppereastgirl member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://northjersey.weddings.com/Sites/weddings/Pages/main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_invitation-wording-one-set-of-parents-helping-pay?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:90Discussion:ff58964a-52d5-49de-8d0c-cb8893f5448aPost:2ae55d68-fa21-4eed-9be5-5db883d07ed4">Re: invitation wording - one set of parents helping to pay</a>:
    [QUOTE]And FYI traditional, whomever is hosting the Wedding is paying the bill.  
    Posted by felicia220[/QUOTE]

    <div>Nope!  Traditionally the bride's parents are hosts (of course, traditionally they're also the ones who foot the bill).  </div><div><span style="color:#000000;font-family:Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:normal;-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing:2px;-webkit-border-vertical-spacing:2px;" class="Apple-style-span"><a href="http://tinyurl.com/2ajfu7" rel="nofollow">http://tinyurl.com/2ajfu7</a></span></div><div><font face="Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="3" class="Apple-style-span" color="#000000"><span style="font-size:13px;line-height:normal;-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing:2px;-webkit-border-vertical-spacing:2px;" class="Apple-style-span"><span style="font-family:Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;" class="Apple-style-span"><a href="http://tinyurl.com/yhx5v6p" rel="nofollow">http://tinyurl.com/yhx5v6p</a> (see last paragraph)</span></span></font></div><div><font face="Verdana, Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="3" class="Apple-style-span" color="#000000"><span style="font-size:13px;line-height:normal;-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing:2px;-webkit-border-vertical-spacing:2px;" class="Apple-style-span"><strong>
    </strong></span></font></div><div>
    </div><div>We did Mr. & Mrs. Myparents request the honour blah blah blah Victoria & John son of Mr. & Mrs. Hisparents.  "Son of" does not at all imply hosting/paying etc. -- it is just a shout out that you can take or leave.  </div><div>
    </div><div>I agree with JustJen -- the whole world doesn't need to know the particulars of the financials of the wedding.  It is more complicated where both sets of parents are chipping in, but where only your parents and you guys are paying, I'd just leave it as the tradition goes.</div>
    image
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    leah2bleah2b member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We are not listing parents but we are fully paying for (and thus hostiing) our wedding on our own and we are a little bit older than average, so its seems appropriate for us.

    Not sure what the best route is in your situation.
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    felicia220felicia220 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Hosting and Paying for the wedding are the same thing.

    It's an eternal question: How will the wedding invitations be worded? As most newly engaged couples know, this can be a touchy subject because what's read between the lines is who's hosting (that is, paying for) the wedding. 

    Straight off the Knot website
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    edited December 2011
    Personally, and this isn't even a paying thing - it is a HOSTING AND PAYING thing... FI's parents are very uninvolved, not just financially...
    So our invites are:
    Mr. and Mrs.   ----
    request the honor of your presence 
    at the marriage of their daughter
    me 
    to 
    FI
  • Options
    uppereastgirluppereastgirl member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.weddings.com/Sites/Weddings/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_invitation-wording-one-set-of-parents-helping-pay?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:90Discussion:ff58964a-52d5-49de-8d0c-cb8893f5448aPost:5b6a913e-d5fa-4cae-bbbf-b4794ed984e1">Re: invitation wording - one set of parents helping to pay</a>:
    [QUOTE]Hosting and Paying for the wedding are the same thing. It's an eternal question: How will the wedding invitations be worded? As most  newly engaged  couples know, this can be a touchy subject because what's read between the lines is who's hosting (that is, paying for) the wedding.  Straight off the Knot website <a href="http://wedding.theknot.com/wedding-planning/wedding-invitations/articles/standard-wedding-invitation-wording-examples.aspx" rel="nofollow">http://wedding.theknot.com/wedding-planning/wedding-invitations/articles/standard-wedding-invitation-wording-examples.aspx</a>
    Posted by felicia220[/QUOTE]

    <div>The Knot does not always take a traditional approach to etiquette... they are much more modern/do what you like.  Also straight off the Knot:</div><div>
    </div><div><span style="color:#1f1f1f;font-size:12px;line-height:17px;" class="Apple-style-span"><h3 style="margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:3px;margin-left:0px;padding-top:2px;padding-right:3px;padding-bottom:0px;padding-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-weight:bold;font-style:inherit;font-size:12px;font-family:inherit;vertical-align:bottom;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;display:inline;color:#777bb1;line-height:12px;border-width:0px;" class="qaquestion qaleadletter">.</h3><div class="qaquestion" style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-weight:bold;font-style:inherit;font-size:12px;font-family:inherit;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;color:#777bb1;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;"><p style="margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:16px;margin-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-weight:inherit;font-style:inherit;font-size:12px;font-family:inherit;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;line-height:17px;border-width:0px;padding:0px;">The groom's parents are contributing a considerable amount of money toward our wedding (though nowhere near half). Is it proper to include his parents on the wedding invitations, i.e., "Mr. and Mrs. John Doe and Mr. and Mrs. Tom Smith would like you to share in the marriage of their children..."?</p></div><p style="padding-top:2px;padding-right:3px;padding-bottom:0px;padding-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-weight:inherit;font-style:inherit;font-size:12px;font-family:inherit;vertical-align:bottom;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;display:inline;line-height:12px;border-width:0px;margin:0px;" class="qaleadletter">A.</p><p style="margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:16px;margin-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-weight:inherit;font-style:inherit;font-size:12px;font-family:inherit;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;line-height:17px;border-width:0px;padding:0px;"> </p><p style="margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:16px;margin-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-weight:inherit;font-style:inherit;font-size:12px;font-family:inherit;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;line-height:17px;border-width:0px;padding:0px;">Here's the funny thing about people's names on the invitations -- everyone <em style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">thinks</em> it signifies who's paying for the wedding, and a lot of the time, the parents listed <em style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">are</em>paying -- but the larger meaning is that they are <em style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">hosting</em> the reception. "Hosting" is a word with flexible meaning. Parents can be official hosts -- they planned the party, they invited the guests, they paid -- or honorary hosts. Maybe the couple paid for their own wedding, but still want to honor the bride's parents <em style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">and</em> the groom's parents on the invitation. Technically, all four parents can be listed on an invitation without putting a penny toward the wedding. (This usually isn't the case, of course.)</p><div style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-weight:inherit;font-style:inherit;font-size:12px;font-family:inherit;vertical-align:baseline;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;"><a href="http://wedding.theknot.com/wedding-questions/wedding-invitation-questions/qa/grooms-parents-host.aspx" rel="nofollow">http://wedding.theknot.com/wedding-questions/wedding-invitation-questions/qa/grooms-parents-host.aspx</a></div></span></div><div>
    </div><div><span style="color:#1f1f1f;font-size:12px;line-height:17px;" class="Apple-style-span"><h3 style="margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:3px;margin-left:0px;padding-top:2px;padding-right:3px;padding-bottom:0px;padding-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:bottom;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;display:inline;color:#777bb1;line-height:12px;font-weight:bold;border-width:0px;" class="qaquestion qaleadletter">Q.</h3><div class="qaquestion" style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;color:#777bb1;font-weight:bold;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;"><p style="margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:16px;margin-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;line-height:17px;border-width:0px;padding:0px;">Is it true that the people whose names are on the invitations are the ones who paid for the wedding?</p></div><p style="padding-top:2px;padding-right:3px;padding-bottom:0px;padding-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:bottom;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;display:inline;line-height:12px;border-width:0px;margin:0px;" class="qaleadletter">A.</p><p style="margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:16px;margin-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;line-height:17px;border-width:0px;padding:0px;"> </p><p style="margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:16px;margin-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;line-height:17px;border-width:0px;padding:0px;">That's usually, but not necessarily, true. The people who send out the invitation -- that means the people who are "requesting the honor of your presence" -- are generally viewed as the wedding hosts. Usually, the couple's parents are the hosts, although sometimes the couple themselves or another relative fills the role. However, a couple might be paying for the entire wedding themselves but still choose to have their invitation issued by their parents as a way of honoring them. Since parents often do pay for the wedding, especially if the couple is under 30, the people whose names are on the invitations are usually the ones who paid for it. But this should not be assumed.</p><p style="margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:16px;margin-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;line-height:17px;border-width:0px;padding:0px;"><span style="color:#4c402a;font-size:11px;line-height:14px;" class="Apple-style-span"><a href="http://wedding.theknot.com/wedding-questions/wedding-invitation-questions/qa/invitation-wording-based-on-who-is-paying.aspx" rel="nofollow">http://wedding.theknot.com/wedding-questions/wedding-invitation-questions/qa/invitation-wording-based-on-who-is-paying.aspx</a></span></p><p style="margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:16px;margin-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;line-height:17px;border-width:0px;padding:0px;"> </p><h3 style="margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:3px;margin-left:0px;padding-top:2px;padding-right:3px;padding-bottom:0px;padding-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:bottom;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;display:inline;color:#777bb1;line-height:12px;font-weight:bold;border-width:0px;" class="qaquestion qaleadletter">Q.</h3><div class="qaquestion" style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;color:#777bb1;font-weight:bold;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;"><p style="margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:16px;margin-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;line-height:17px;border-width:0px;padding:0px;">The groom's parents are contributing a considerable amount of money toward our wedding (though nowhere near half). Is it proper to include his parents on the wedding invitations, i.e., "Mr. and Mrs. John Doe and Mr. and Mrs. Tom Smith would like you to share in the marriage of their children..."?</p></div><p style="padding-top:2px;padding-right:3px;padding-bottom:0px;padding-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:bottom;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;display:inline;line-height:12px;border-width:0px;margin:0px;" class="qaleadletter">A.</p><p style="margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:16px;margin-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;line-height:17px;border-width:0px;padding:0px;"> </p><p style="margin-top:0px;margin-right:0px;margin-bottom:16px;margin-left:0px;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;line-height:17px;border-width:0px;padding:0px;">Here's the funny thing about people's names on the invitations -- everyone <em style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">thinks</em> it signifies who's paying for the wedding, and a lot of the time, the parents listed <em style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">are</em>paying -- but the larger meaning is that they are <em style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">hosting</em> the reception. "Hosting" is a word with flexible meaning. Parents can be official hosts -- they planned the party, they invited the guests, they paid -- or honorary hosts. Maybe the couple paid for their own wedding, but still want to honor the bride's parents <em style="border-style:initial;border-color:initial;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;font-size:12px;vertical-align:baseline;background-image:initial;background-repeat:initial;background-attachment:initial;-webkit-background-clip:initial;-webkit-background-origin:initial;background-color:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">and</em> the groom's parents on the invitation. Technically, all four parents can be listed on an invitation without putting a penny toward the wedding. (This usually isn't the case, of course.)</p><div><a href="http://wedding.theknot.com/wedding-questions/wedding-invitation-questions/qa/grooms-parents-host.aspx" rel="nofollow">http://wedding.theknot.com/wedding-questions/wedding-invitation-questions/qa/grooms-parents-host.aspx</a></div><p> </p></span></div>
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    felicia220felicia220 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I found a ton of things online, saying the same thing (That hosting and paying were the same and the traditional way) That is where the hosting came from.  

    I was simply saying that TRADITIONALLY, that is how is worded and why, The older generations will see it that way.  If the OP wants people to know that she was paying as well then she could include her name.  If you look at my original post, you will see that I said that I didn't care who people thought were paying for it.  But I am making that point that people will come to the conclusion that my parents and FMIL are paying together because of how I worded it.  Because, again, that is TRADITIONAL how it is done.
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    melissa82melissa82 member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I have never looked at an invitation for information on who is paying for a wedding.

    And I think it's pretty crappy to purposely word your invitation with the intentions of informing guests exactly who did and did not pay and how much credit they should be receiving. Why?
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    edited December 2011
    We are in the same exact postion.....my parents are giving us a large portion, and FI and I are paying the rest.  FMIL is not able to contribute to the wedding financially, however, will be hosting the rehearsal dinner.

    In order to include everyone and not single anyone out, we are going to go with something along the lines below.  Haven't perfected this yet..so the wording is a bit awkward...and may make a few changes.

    If you are not going to go that route, I would still include the FMIL's name on the invite...like "son of XXX"

    Because you have shared in
    our lives
    by your friendship and love we,
    BRIDE
    and
    GROOM
    together with our parents,
    BRIDE'S PARENTS
    and
    GROOM'S MOTHER
    invite you to share
    the beginning of our new life
    together
    when we exchange marriage
    vows
    ....etc.
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