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Any Bypass Brides?

I am going in for bypass in 2 weeks (after a long long road and tons of waiting) and am so nervous.  Are there any bypass brides here?  If so, howhas it impacted your wedding planning or actual wedding?  I have a feeling I will be so insecure trying on gowns.  I guess I am just looking for some words of encouragement Embarassed

Re: Any Bypass Brides?

  • qtrfanqtrfan
    Eighth Anniversary 10 Comments Combo Breaker
    member
    edited March 2013
    My daughter did.  She had her surgery in February and married in November, having lost 1/2 her body weight from 300 to about 150 in that period of time.  She purchased her gown in early summer at a size 18 and it fit perfectly.  By late October when she had her final fitting, she was drowning in the gown.  The seamstress did a beautiful job.  However, by the wedding  day, she had lost more weight and the gown was a little too loose - but it looked OK.

    One warning I might add is to be sure you and your FI are on the same page with this surgery.  Her marriage failed in less than 6 months after they had been together 5 years prior to the wedding.  There are a lot of dynamics involved with obesity and relationships.   Considering her ex moved on to another obese woman after the divorce, we learned that he is attracted to big women.  Plus my daughter gained her voice and confidence as she lost the weight and she was less likely to take his crap.  He was not happy with a woman who would actually stand up for herself.

    I am 2 years out from surgery having lost 100 lbs, so I know what you are going through. It is so worth it. I assume you have had counseling prior to your surgery, so it might be worth your time to discuss your future marriage. It would be good to include your FI if that is possible.  This weight loss just doesn't change your body - it changes your entire image physically and mentally how you think about yourself.  You want to be sure that both you and your guy are prepared because it is so much more than weight loss.
    kspencer1284
  • I have thought of doing this as well.  but it will more likely have to wait till after the wedding for me. though i do have to say the previous poster is right. 
    MAKE SURE future hubby is on board!  if not dont do it.  i had an ex that was all about bigger gals and even tried to convinvce me to get up over 300 to 400 lbs. wanted nothign to do wiht me being skinny and i flat out refused to purposedly gain weight and i was eventually dropped like a sack of hot taters  for a gal way bigger then me wiht a heavier looking face.  better make for sure he isnt phsically attracted to you cause of your size. 
  • I am getting married on October 12th of this year and I am having a gastric sleeve procedure in one month. I am petrified. I am a very large woman, almost 400 pounds, and already have issues with sagging arms. After I have the surgery I know it will be worse. I am so afraid that my arms will look disgusting at my wedding (I have major self esteem issues with my arms, though. You may not have the same issues). I already ordered my wedding dress and was advised by my doctor and my surgical team that I order it several sizes smaller, so instead of a 26 I ordered it in a 20. I wish you all the luck if you decide to do it! I had decided before that I was going to wait for after the wedding, however I realized my health was #1 priority and I shouldn't be focusing on the little things.....besides, if it comes down to it I figure I can always ask my photographer to photoshop my arms :)

    Best of luck to you, if you don't mind you should keep us updated! I will if you will!
  • P.S. I agree with what these ladies are saying about men being attracted to women of size. I was with someone who talked me out of having surgery before because he was afraid it would change our relationship because he wanted a big girl. He left me and went to someone else who was big. My fiancee loves me for me, no matter what size I am. I have known him since I was 8. He is an amazing source of strength for me and I was with him when he went through the same procedure I am going to have. He said he just wants me healthy. It is definitely a decision that needs to be made together, however I do not agree with the statement that if he does not agree that you shouldn't do it.....the surgery isn't one for vanity, it is for your health and your longevity. If he doesn't want you to have the surgery for his own wants and needs, then there is something more going on that needs to be addressed. Don't put your health on the back burner to make someone else happy.
  • First off CONGRATULATIONS! On your engagement and your upcoming, life changing surgery! Good for you on making that choice!

    When you try on dresses be honest with your consultant. They've probably been around for awhile and will have tons of suggestions.

    I know you mentioned nothing about you future hubby being on board but...

    If your hubby is not on board then you dump him!

    Don't not not have a surgery that could eventually be life saving because of a man!

    Ive been losing weight and Eric would never leave me because I got thinner in fact my weight loss has encouraged him!

    Cant' wait to see pics of the dress you choose.

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