April 2012 Weddings

FMIL Drama!


My FI and I made a guest list. 91 people. That was perfect.

Then, we find out his mother made a "wish list" of 56. Fifty SIX! *pulls hair.*

I very politely told her at Christmas (last time we saw each other) that I wanted a somewhat intimate affair, absolutely no more than 100 and ideally no more than 75 actually in attendance (this may not happen, I know). This was for budgeting reasons and because I have never wanted a big to do. How are we supposed to fit in my family, my friends, and Scott's friends in that cap if she wants to ask 56 people?!?! 

Now granted, about 30 of those people will be invited, because they are close family and friends of Scott's. No questions asked. They were included in our 91. I am even willing to go up to 35 or 40, but no more than 40 for her. So this means I am giving her more than half of her wish list. 

Who is paying, some might ask? My grandmother is paying for 80-90% of everything. She gave us a lump sum, most of which is going to the HM and into savings. The amount she gave is far too much to spend on the kind of wedding I would like, in my opinion. 

However, FMIL feels that, because we are getting married in her, small town church , we should invite most of the church members. From what I can gather, no one really does this. My dad did not invite a soul from our church when he married my stepmom. Space was an issue there, but this time it's mainly budget reasons, and simply because I don't want a lot of people there!!! She just has this "our turf, our rules" mentality, while my family has the "who controls the purse controls the power" mentality! 

Scott said that she agreed to her list being cut down, but I know she won't be happy about it and will give us grief. I am by no means going to let her have all 56, but I just hope I can help her realize that inviting that many people would be unfair to my side of the family. I don't want to bring up the money issue (they are helping out, for the rehearsal dinner and a few other things, but no where near as much as my family) and sound bratty, but if she keeps ignoring my wishes, I might have to. 

(Btw, I know I have mentioned some of this in a previous post, but I needed to vent. Sorry. =D)
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