Reception & Kids

Future*Mrs.L*2010

Hi Ladies, 

So FI's sister and brother-in-law are both in the wedding party and have a 3 year old who is a ring bearer in the wedding that they never leave.  They had originally said their son would have no problem sitting with his cousins and grandparents at the reception.  Recently, however, they have realized this will not work and see no reason why the kid can't sit at the head table with them.  It would be one thing if it were just the one kid in the wedding, but there are also 4 flower girls in addition to their ring bearer son.  Am I being completely irrational by telling them that I don't want kids sitting at the head table?  I don't want to step on any toes, but I also think that this is the one day that I am allowed to have things the way I want them to be (which is very unlike me on a normal day).  I know what I want to do about this situation, but just wanted to check with other bride-to-be's before I make any moves.  

TIA 

MiniMin20

Are the parents of the flower girls also sitting at the head table? If not, then I think it's fine to have just the ring bearer up there. Also, if the flower girls are older, then people will understand a three-year-old needs more supervision.

Yes, it is your day, and you want to have things a certain way, but this is family. It's not unreasonable that parents want to be near their three-year-old to make sure he doesn't act up or cause trouble. I mean, do you really want him tearing around the reception room or throwing a fit because his parents aren't next to him to discipline him?

If FI's sister and BIL would understand, you could have them sit at a different table than the head table, but they may feel slighted by that. But my recommendation is not to have a head table at all. Do a sweetheart table for you and your FI, then have a couple tables for bridal party and their families. That way no one feels like they're being slighted, the little one is kept under control and you don't have to have a kid sitting with you at dinner.

IMO, it's better to keep the peace with your new in-laws than have the perfect head table.

Also, I believe you're new to the Maine board. Introduce yourself and tell us a little more about your wedding!