Need some perspective please....

anniemac1581

My wedding is Friday and from the start we had a no children policy with the exception of flower girls..now there are 2 infants coming (1 of which is a wailer, like full on crying all day, colic maybe?).  I dont want to be annoyed by this but I am.  And due to whom the parents of the kids are I cant say they no, so Im stuck with it.  Ugh.  Someone help me get a grip please.....

kipperblue68

I would not be concerned about it, but that's just me.
Remember this is your big day, don't sweat the small stuff.
A crying baby is out of your control. 
Try not to control everything anyway.  Let it flow.
Congratulations!  I'm sure you will have an absolutely lovely wedding.

~Renée

rlavach

GET A GRIP! *slaps face*

Feel better?? Just kidding. Well, I can understand that you'd be upset if someone is bringing their kid without your consent and you feel like you can't say no. The only thing I can say is perhaps notify your event staff that there might be a crying baby there. If the baby goes nuts, then maybe a staff member can tap her on the shoulder and ask her to leave the room so others can hear? I know it sounds harsh, but it's better coming from a stranger than from a family member that she can hold a grudge to forever. I've seen this done at church a few times when kids just lose their minds. 

[Deleted User]

Meh...I feel like infants don't fall under the no children rule, and hopefully their parents would have the sense to take them out of the room if they are loud enough to be disruptive.  I wouldn't worry about it, its not a big enough deal to ruin your day.

em01092

If they are nursing infants, you really either have to allow them to come or not be surprised when the mom can't come. Sure some women can pump but not all women are able to do so, and/or they may not have any family or someone they trust close by to watch the child. Or if they are traveling to attend your wedding, they may not have anyone to watch the child or may not want anyone to watch the child for that long.

You could also hire a sitter to watch the children during the ceremony and/or reception, but the parents may not feel comfortable with someone they do not know watching their child.  

I would just try not to worry about it. You're going to have so much else on your mind. Even if the kid is wailing, you will be so caught up in your FI's eyes as you say your vows that you won't notice. Hopefully the parents will have enough sense to remove their wailing kid should the situation arise. 

Trixeetrix

I agree.  You shouldn't let this bother you.  I too ended up with an unplanned infant at my no children wedding.  It is what it is!  Not much I can do.  Once the ceremony is over people will be talking and nobody will notice a baby crying.
 
I love rlavach's idea - if the baby cries during the ceremony have someone (a stranger) ask them politely to leave the room.  Although I think parents would do this anyways without being asked.

rlavach

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2012-weddings_need-some-perspective-please?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:05427f07-4ba2-44d6-9271-99a7af1ee5c0Discussion:0f310c4b-ea42-4a03-8019-84662a1291c6Post:cb643ec2-a3a5-4795-bd16-efa46a1570d6">Re: Need some perspective please....</a>:
[QUOTE]I agree.  You shouldn't let this bother you.  I too ended up with an unplanned infant at my no children wedding.  It is what it is!  Not much I can do.  Once the ceremony is over people will be talking and nobody will notice a baby crying.   I love rlavach's idea - if the baby cries during the ceremony have someone (a stranger) ask them politely to leave the room.  <strong>Although I think parents would do this anyways without being asked.</strong>
Posted by Trixeetrix[/QUOTE]
You'd be surprised. Usually people know that your child is a wailer because you don't have the sense to leave the room & just them them go off. Some parents get so used to it that they're numb & don't even hear it. Honestly, I've seen it happen. Then all of a sudden they snap out of it & take the kid out. Funny stuff.

Trixeetrix

Wow!  Thats crazy.  I guess I really don't spend enough time around infants to notice this.  FH and I do not want kids!  Just a dog is enough. 

FutureGray

Yikes! We had our only infant attendee start getting fussy in the middle of our ceremony, and his dad immediately got up and took him for a walk. Problem solved.

Hopefully your guests will be just as considerate! I don't think having someone at the ready to remind the parents to remove the baby if it gets fussy is out of line though... They could frame it as, "There's a perfect area here at the back of the church where you could walk with her until she calms down," rather than "Get that kid outta here!" to make it more helpful, less bossy, if you're concerned about hurt feelings.

blgrout

I have a couple kids coming to our "no-kids" wedding too, and its kind of annoying but we're just dealing with it (no sense in being mad at it at this point).  Hopefully the parents have the good sense to take the kid outside if he gets fussy. 

anniemac1581

Next question..so one of the moms with the wailer is in the bridal party, i have her at a table with all of my bffs and other young family members (young like 20s-30's) only one of them has a child and she has a baby sittter so she can party...everyone else has no kids.  if she tells me shes keeping him at the reception all night should i move her to a more mellow table with some people that probably arent looking to get their drink on?  i just dont want the other guests who are looking to have fun be subjected to doodie talk or crying.  or do i just say screw it and stop worrying?

rlavach

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2012-weddings_need-some-perspective-please?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:05427f07-4ba2-44d6-9271-99a7af1ee5c0Discussion:0f310c4b-ea42-4a03-8019-84662a1291c6Post:f6f74184-4972-4d1f-a0db-3b228d1559c6">Re: Need some perspective please....</a>:
[QUOTE]Next question..so one of the moms with the wailer is in the bridal party, i have her at a table with all of my bffs and other young family members (young like 20s-30's) only one of them has a child and she has a baby sittter so she can party...everyone else has no kids.  if she tells me shes keeping him at the reception all night should i move her to a more mellow table with some people that probably arent looking to get their drink on?  i just dont want the other guests who are looking to have fun be subjected to doodie talk or crying.  <strong>or do i just say screw it and stop worrying?</strong>
Posted by anniemac1581[/QUOTE]
You're really overthinking this. If the table has young people who will get their 'drink on,' then they are most likely going to be moving around, talking to others, at the bar, on the dance floor. They probably will only sit for dinner. That's what I do at every wedding I go to. Oh, and dessert. Really, this is her problem. She will be the one that looks ridiculous when she can't even control her child. Regardless of where she sits, she will inconvenience someone with the screaming. Let her deal with it & look ridiculous. Just be a beautiful bride & stop worrying!!!

xos0inlove

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2012-weddings_need-some-perspective-please?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:05427f07-4ba2-44d6-9271-99a7af1ee5c0Discussion:0f310c4b-ea42-4a03-8019-84662a1291c6Post:0c105a40-c2a0-42e7-8028-1e36ec191b97">Re: Need some perspective please....</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need some perspective please.... : You're really overthinking this. If the table has young people who will get their 'drink on,' then they are most likely going to be moving around, talking to others, at the bar, on the dance floor. They probably will only sit for dinner. That's what I do at every wedding I go to. Oh, and dessert. Really, this is her problem. She will be the one that looks ridiculous when she can't even control her child. Regardless of where she sits, she will inconvenience someone with the screaming.<strong> Let her deal with it & look ridiculous. Just be a beautiful bride & stop worrying!!!</strong>
Posted by rlavach[/QUOTE]

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</div><div>This! </div>