July 2013 Weddings

Am I being weird?

Up until this year, FI and I have maintained separate bank accounts. I have a checking and savings account that I established many years ago during college. He has a checking and savings account at a local credit union. At the beginning of the year, we decided to open up a wedding savings account at his credit union, with both of our names on it. In the process of setting up the account, the credit union informed us that my name would now be added to ALL of FI's accounts. I did not like the idea, but FI had no problem with it and said we should proceed, so we did.

Recently FI suggested that I close my own accounts and transfer my money to what was formerly his own, and is now our joint account. I have no problem with transferring the bulk of my money to our joint account. It would make it a lot easier for us to pay our joint bills (rent, utilities, cell phone, vet bills for our dog, etc.) and also help each other pay off our debts (my student loans, his credit cards). However, I am hesitant to completely give up my own bank accounts! I have always had my own acount, and after we get married I envisioned that FI and I would have a joint account to pay all of our expenses, and then our own personal accounts to pay for whatever we want (me: clothes, shoes, dumb stuff I buy for our dog, etc. and him: movies, video games, bodybuilding stuff, etc.) But FI doesn't see the point. He would like for us to just have one joint account. 

I realize finances are a personal thing, and every couple has to do what works best for them... but what do you ladies think? Am I being weird? 
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Re: Am I being weird?

  • I know for me, I would want a seperate savings account. Everyone should always have their own money. Actually FI and I still have seperate accounts and I dont think that will change. We split the bills, so we each have half and pay out of our own account. If we are saving for something, we actually dont keep it iin a bank, we keep it in a safe and add to it. Just dont wanna mess with adding and then taking out/closing accounts all the time, KWIM.

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  • We have a joint account and separate accounts. And it's such a PITA.

    I think the reason it's such a pain for us is because between all of our accounts we're dealing with 3 different banks. We're going to switch everything over to the same bank which will make transferring money around easier. We will each retain personal accounts, but the majority of our money will go in joint accounts. 

    I don't blame you for not wanting to give up a personal bank account, but I would suggest you try to do it all at one bank if possible to make things easier. I find it weird that your name automatically went on all your FI's accounts BTW. Not that I know much about this stuff - we're in the early research stage for our new bank/accounts - but it seems odd. 
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  • I have an account at a credit union and its usually how they do it. if you add someone to your account, they get added to all of them. Dont know why, just do.

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  • AmJam04AmJam04 member
    Seventh Anniversary 100 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited September 2012
    FI and I have a joint savings/checking/credit account and we both each have our own separate checking/credit accounts. It really has never been a problem for us -- bills and shared purchases come from the joint account, and individual purchases come from our own accounts.
    We do have our joint as our "priority" account, so if it ever gets low, we're both obligated to pull from our individuals to put into the joint... though we try not to let that happen in the first place!

    Also, everything (except the CC) is at one bank. It keeps things easier.
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  • Chels&JimmyChels&Jimmy member
    1000 Comments 5 Love Its First Anniversary
    edited September 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_am-i-being-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:bc298662-2007-4faf-a897-3b6dc68bea38Post:99a58ab2-bdb3-4d93-87a0-2443d4c145ba">Re: Am I being weird?</a>:
    [QUOTE]FI and I have a joint savings/checking/credit account and we both each have our own separate checking/credit accounts. It really has never been a problem for us -- bills and shared purchases come from the joint account, and individual purchases come from our own accounts. We do have our joint as our "priority" account, so if it ever gets low, we're both obligated to pull from our individuals to put into the joint... though we try not to let that happen in the first place! Also, everything (except the CC) is at one bank. It keeps things easier.
    Posted by AmJam04[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>Thank you guys for the input! This (above) is exactly what I had in mind. I definitely like the idea of having all of our accounts at one bank, and would not mind switching to the credit union. The bank I'm at now, sucks! I will suggest this to FI - good compromise. </div><div>
    </div><div>I also found it strange that my names were automatically added to all of FI's accounts... when I asked about it, they just said that that's how it was done. I figured it was no use arguing with them if that's their policy, and FI was okay with it, so I let it go. It really doesn't make sense though... now I am wondering what will happen when I try to open my own account at the credit union. Will FI's name be added to that account since I technically already have an account there? Weird stuff.

    </div>
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_am-i-being-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:bc298662-2007-4faf-a897-3b6dc68bea38Post:99a58ab2-bdb3-4d93-87a0-2443d4c145ba">Re: Am I being weird?</a>:
    [QUOTE]FI and I have a joint savings/checking/credit account and we both each have our own separate checking/credit accounts. It really has never been a problem for us -- bills and shared purchases come from the joint account, and individual purchases come from our own accounts. We do have our joint as our "priority" account, so if it ever gets low, we're both obligated to pull from our individuals to put into the joint... though we try not to let that happen in the first place! Also, everything (except the CC) is at one bank. It keeps things easier.
    Posted by AmJam04[/QUOTE]

    This is exactly what we do as well. It works out really good for us. Our wedding account is at a CU but our regular accounts are with Wells Fargo which makes it really easy to transfer money to each other and the joint account when we have to. I am way too controlling to let my individual accounts go :)
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  • ditto AmJam! I'm a banker, so we've been able to try a few different things, but this has worked pretty well. We have a joint checking and savings, which we put about half of our paychecks into. We pay the bills out of the checking and the rest gets moved into savings. We also have a separate "wedding" savings account that we are each paying into whenever we can, since we're financing the wedding ourselves! Then, we have our separate accounts. I handle all of our finances anyway, so it's kind of a moot point for him to have a separate account, but it works for now, and maybe in the future we'll join everything together.

    Curious for those of you with joint credit accounts...how does that work for you? Do you take turns paying it off / minimum payment? I love my FI but he's terrible with credit cards (and actually, I am too) so I don't think I'd want to take any chances with affecting our credit, especially when we want to buy a house within the next couple years!
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  • I appreciate all of the input, ladies!

    missquela, we take turns paying our joint credit accounts, i.e. I pay one month, he pays the next month.
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  • Im late to the party but wanted to chime in. We both have our own separate savings and checking accounts. If we want to save for something aka the honeymoon that just goes into a super secret hiding spot at home. I pay for most of the utilities for the house and he pays the mortgage ugh! Along with a few others. Since the utilities are in his name I just write him a check and thats that. I think even after the wedding we'll keep it separate. I know he'll be my husband and all but I wouldn't feel comfortable going into "our" money for personal items like clothes or whatever.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_am-i-being-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:bc298662-2007-4faf-a897-3b6dc68bea38Post:a99965bb-a9e5-4480-b00d-28c10f2b6cff">Re:Am I being weird?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I know he'll be my husband and all but I wouldn't feel comfortable going into "our" money for personal items like clothes or whatever.
    Posted by Getting2Vowels[/QUOTE]

    That is how I feel too.
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