Just a vent I guess

vantica

I've always said I don't stress easily.  It seems as I get older this is becoming less true.  Lol.  I also never thought I would let people get to me when planning this wedding.  This is also becoming less true.  And it seems like it's always the same people now.  Most recently, it's the photographer.  My fmil works with one regularily on a local paper she produces, and she got him and his assistant to shoot our wedding at a great price, that she's covering.  She said we would only get a disk of pictures, unless we want to order a book from them, which is awesome.  I'd much rather print out what I wanted for where I want it.

Anyway, my FI caught the guy on fb last night and asked him if he had an ETA on the engagement photos we did last weekend.  I got him to mention that we wanted to use the pics to make a guestbook.  I thought by saying this it would let him know that while we're not in a huge hurry for them, we don't just want them a few weeks before the wedding either.  Instead he got all weird, saying they don't want any pictures edited because it's their name out there, and what if we did a signing poster (ummmmm......no), and just let him know how we want it set up and they would do it, etc. etc.  I was like....wth.  What's the point in getting digital files if there are restrictions?  I can totally see not wanting us to edit them, and if they are good enough we shouldn't have to.  But I should be able to use them as I want to.

There's been some emailing back and forth.  Nothing's been settled yet as I'm really not clear on what's been said (the speak filipino and I'm relying on FI to translate) and we are trying to clarify with FI's mother on everything.   But I can't stop thinking about it and being stressed and irritated, even though I'm trying to take deep breaths and go on with my day until I hear back.

Yes, it's partially a control thing......I want to make it so that I know it's exactly what I want.  I hate relying on someone else to read my mind.  The invites are already not going to be perfect because of his mother and I'm already trying to just ignore that too.  Plus it's FUN to make things.  I WANT to do it.

And the thing is, if I hadn't made FI mention the guestbook we probably wouldn't be going through this right now. 

Ok, I feel a bit better for the moment.

MrsBassPlaya

Hmmm... what does the contract say?  If the contract states that you get a disk of photos with printing rights, then you should be able to use those however you want.  However, if the contract doesn't say anything about you having printing rights, then they're probably not going to let you make a guest book out of them on your own.  I would definitely look back at the contract and figure out exactly what rights you have.  If you don't have printing rights, I honestly would probably start looking for another wedding photographer.  But that's just my opinion.  Maybe at the price this photographer is being paid, you can afford to pay them for prints.

melissa199

I know exactly how you feel about not knowing the details, relying on other people's judgement and just overall stress. I said this morning I'm done caring about the wedding details for the next few days. I just need a break. Lol. I know that's all rubbish though, because here I am on TK, doing wedding stuff. Sheesh.

vantica

There is no contract.  This is one of those "friends of the mother" sort of thing.  We were just going by what she told us, that we would get a disk of the pictures.  If she was wrong, then that's what we're trying to clarify. 

As for another photographer......while it's very much tempting, I'm really not sure how we'd go about it without major drama.  I mean, if we have to we have to, but I'd really rather not start off on such a bad foot with his mother.  And I know most photographers don't give you a disk without a major cost anyway, so going that route may not work out any better for us either.

I'm also not opposed to paying for prints in the end either, if we have to, but I'm either making this guestbook as I want it, or we just won't have one with the engagement photos.....which is a bummer.  Not sure what else we will do for that then.  Not a fan of signature frames, or anything else that has to go on the wall.


In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_just-a-vent-i-guess?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:00c23528-98a1-4537-a142-073a5e1a619aPost:fa6e24de-3841-43a0-87ef-53480a27113f">Re: Just a vent I guess</a>:
[QUOTE]Hmmm... what does the contract say?  If the contract states that you get a disk of photos with printing rights, then you should be able to use those however you want.  However, if the contract doesn't say anything about you having printing rights, then they're probably not going to let you make a guest book out of them on your own.  I would definitely look back at the contract and figure out exactly what rights you have.  If you don't have printing rights, I honestly would probably start looking for another wedding photographer.  But that's just my opinion.  Maybe at the price this photographer is being paid, you can afford to pay them for prints.
Posted by MrsBassPlaya[/QUOTE]

vantica

I know hey?  I feel like I can't really stop planning because there's still so much to do.  We got engaged in April and getting married in September.  I don't do things every day, but sometimes things happen that make me realize time is running short and anything that needs to be ordered really should be soon, hence the guestbook.


In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_just-a-vent-i-guess?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:00c23528-98a1-4537-a142-073a5e1a619aPost:7cbd1c21-0d8c-4034-88ee-6ede15db29dd">Re:Just a vent I guess</a>:
[QUOTE]I know exactly how you feel about not knowing the details, relying on other people's judgement and just overall stress. I said this morning I'm done caring about the wedding details for the next few days. I just need a break. Lol. <strong>I know that's all rubbish though, because here I am on TK, doing wedding stuff.</strong> Sheesh.
Posted by melissa199[/QUOTE]