September 2012 Weddings

It costs how much!!!

Is what FI keeps repeating over and over!

We need to book our hotel rooms for the night before the wedding and the night of now, since there are already 12 weddings with contracts at the hotels.

I'll stay at one hotel with a living room and bedroom, that way the girls can get ready with me and they wont have to pay for two nights.  The problem is its $200 each night, and we need to have both because check in isn't until 3pm and that's not enough time for a over 9 women to get ready for a 5pm ceremony...

He'll be staying at the hotel across the street in a large room both nights and that's another $225.

He is throwing the biggest temper tantrum because I wont allow anyone to get ready at our house or have pictures done in our apartment.  Its not remodeled and I hate it.  I don't want to look at pictures or see our video in a few years and see a cracked wall or an unfinished ceiling.

Just had to vent.

Re: It costs how much!!!

  • Ah dont worry I have had many of those "IT COSTS HOW MUCH" conversations... Mostly for the details... he tried to convince me to bake my own cake!!!!
    talk to the hotel and see if they can arrange an early check in - sometimes they acoomodate, specially if it is a wedding

  • I know you don't want to hear this, but that's $500 you could spend elsewhere. I'm on FI's side. Maybe look into family/friends. I know we're getting ready at my MOH's house and FI is getting ready at his best mans condo.
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  • Using someone else's place could be an option but I totally understand your frustration and desire to have these rooms. Luckily for me my family has rented a suite downtown so I don't have to and the guys are going to the cottage the night before. FI does complain about some things but luckily he doesn't make it seem like the cost is my fault; WE are getting married and WE are spending the money. I think as long as you both talk the expenses over and make decisions mutually any cost is justified :)
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_it-costs-how-much?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:0acfaac6-5b87-4fec-a7ec-7de3bbfcab37Post:33247e20-e3b7-4f31-8797-41b230bc43bb">Re: It costs how much!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Using someone else's place could be an option but I totally understand your frustration and desire to have these rooms. Luckily for me my family has rented a suite downtown so I don't have to and the guys are going to the cottage the night before. FI does complain about some things but luckily he doesn't make it seem like the cost is my fault; WE are getting married and WE are spending the money. I think as long as you both talk the expenses over and make decisions mutually any cost is justified :)
    Posted by mamameech[/QUOTE]

    Pretty much this!
    I am staying in our wedding night suite the night before the wedding, its $350 a night! BUT my girls with exception of my SIL ans FSIL are staying with me-we have a 2 pm weddign and will have to start getting ready early, and the room is gorgeous! I want photographs in there, and it was a big selling point on the venue.  FI understands that, we also have a house on the grounds rented where the boys will stay if weather is bad on the water-otherwise they will be at the cottage and will boat over in the am and get ready at the house.  The 3 bedroom ranch house with full kitchen and 2 bathrooms was $155 a night so between the 2 its a $1000 for accommodations the entire weekend.  It is a lot, but we are accommodating our parties for the night before and many of our bridal party are couplse split between the sides, I have a 3 room bathroom and massive suite with balcony and its own turret for gorgeous picture and the house is where we will have babysitting and we've given it to the family of the girls who are babysitting to stay in that night as part of our thank you to the girls offering their services!

    You just have weight the options, I understand your concerns about the money but think of it being your wedding day and being crowded and uncomfortable, I know I won't anyone in my house near the day let alone on my wedding day. I feel like I'd forget something or be extra stressed because its my house, I should be host etc and on that day its going to be all about me at least for a little bit and I don't want to clean or worry or cramp or crowd.  I think you deserve it! 
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  • I hear ya.  Our apartment is cute for what it is but it is on the smaller side and there are areas where there was a teeny bit of water damage so the paint is peeling.  I am still having the girls and I get ready here.  I love the idea of getting ready at a hotel but I can't convince myself to spend the extra money.  I'm going to let my photog do her job and she's pretty good so I'm sure she will take the picture in a way where there wont be imperfections blatantly in the pic.  Plus, I figure everyone will be more into seeing the pics of me and the girls to notice a teeny crack in the background, etc.  
  • Getting ready at a family memeber or friends house is not an option, we are the only ones who live in this area.  Every single guest is traveling 45+ minutes to get here.  I cant get ready down in MA, because we'd never make it back into NH with the traffic.  The only person we know with a huge house is my godmother and that just wouldn't work because of the location :(

    I think we just need to deal with it.  I'm checking AAA, and other vacation sites to see if those are better than the wedding rates.  I keep telling him we can give his room to his parents or best man for the Saturday, and he's not seeing that its a nice gesture, he's just seeing we're paying for it.

  • This is precisely the reason Dan doesn't know the price of my dress. he was outraged that it could cost $2500. little does he know, it's double that :/
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_it-costs-how-much?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:0acfaac6-5b87-4fec-a7ec-7de3bbfcab37Post:25ad89a9-7c1f-4357-90af-f6d2cf1a872f">Re: It costs how much!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Getting ready at a family memeber or friends house is not an option, we are the only ones who live in this area.  Every single guest is traveling 45+ minutes to get here.  I cant get ready down in MA, because we'd never make it back into NH with the traffic.  The only person we know with a huge house is my godmother and that just wouldn't work because of the location :( I think we just need to deal with it.  I'm checking AAA, and other vacation sites to see if those are better than the wedding rates.  I keep telling him we can give his room to his parents or best man for the Saturday, and he's not seeing that its a nice gesture, he's just seeing we're paying for it.
    Posted by DirtyWater[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div>I'm in a similiar bind as you seeing that my bridesmaids all live close to an hour away from the venue. I don't want them to come out for the rehearsal dinner Friday night, then have to drive home and drive back the next morning. The only other issue I have is that three of my girls will have little babies by that time. I don't expect them to pay for a hotel for themselves, but how am I to pay for hotel rooms for all of them and their little babies?! I'm hoping we can figure something out....I think you're doing the right thing. Distance is a factor and the hotel rooms will help you be calm and not worried about your house. Plus, who wants to mess up their apartment before their wedding and then have to worry about coming back from the wedding to a messy house?!</div>
  • If there's no other option than FI should be a bit more accommodating :P
    Check out some other potentially cheaper options and give him the info; I'd print off some more expensive options so that the current option looks the best LOL (I'm just eeeevillll :P)

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  • edited February 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_it-costs-how-much?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:0acfaac6-5b87-4fec-a7ec-7de3bbfcab37Post:49b2c48d-5fe2-40d6-b91f-86c204094648">It costs how much!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Is what FI keeps repeating over and over! We need to book our hotel rooms for the night before the wedding and the night of now, since there are already 12 weddings with contracts at the hotels. I'll stay at one hotel with a living room and bedroom, that way the girls can get ready with me and they wont have to pay for two nights.  The problem is its $200 each night, and we need to have both because check in isn't until 3pm and that's not enough time for a over 9 women to get ready for a 5pm ceremony... <strong>He'll be staying at the hotel across the street in a large room both nights and that's another $225</strong>. He is throwing the biggest temper tantrum because I wont allow anyone to get ready at our house or have pictures done in our apartment.  Its not remodeled and I hate it.  I don't want to look at pictures or see our video in a few years and see a cracked wall or an unfinished ceiling. Just had to vent.
    Posted by DirtyWater[/QUOTE]

    I'm a little confused by the bolded part...your FI will be staying both nights?  Night before wedding and the night of the wedding?  Is there anyway to maybe down grade his room? 
    Another option maybe the groom and groomsmen could come to the venue dressed, without ties and bouts and then put them on at the venue so the photographer could get pictures there.
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  • Two suggestions...one, couldn't he get ready at your place?  Why do you need the second room the night before for him?  If he got ready at your place the second hotel room would be unnecessary.  Two, maybe consider giving your room away for the night of.  I've heard from several people to NOT have you and your girls get ready in the suite where you will be staying your wedding night.  With makeup, shoes, hair stuff, toothbrushes, cell phone chargers etc someone is bound to leave something they need in your room and you don't want anyone knocking on your door for their stuff on your wedding night.  I'd probably want to tell them to bug off but if they have to leave first thing in the morning for home, they need their stuff.

    We happen to get a free room for every 20 rooms we book (which we'll book for sure) so I'll probably be giving that to my parents or MOH under the condition we can get ready there.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_it-costs-how-much?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:0acfaac6-5b87-4fec-a7ec-7de3bbfcab37Post:1b431328-e385-4354-809d-dd0b89d4f57e">Re: It costs how much!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Two suggestions...one, couldn't he get ready at your place?  Why do you need the second room the night before for him?  If he got ready at your place the second hotel room would be unnecessary.  Two, maybe consider giving your room away for the night of.  I've heard from several people to NOT have you and your girls get ready in the suite where you will be staying your wedding night.  With makeup, shoes, hair stuff, toothbrushes, cell phone chargers etc someone is bound to leave something they need in your room and you don't want anyone knocking on your door for their stuff on your wedding night.  I'd probably want to tell them to bug off but if they have to leave first thing in the morning for home, they need their stuff. We happen to get a free room for every 20 rooms we book (which we'll book for sure) so I'll probably be giving that to my parents or MOH under the condition we can get ready there.
    Posted by volleygurl0306[/QUOTE]

    We need the Fri/Sat bookings because check out is 11 and check in is 3.  Not enough time worked in and there are no exceptions on an early check in.  I'm trying to get him to give his room to someone.  Our room will be the after party room.  We could care less about having alone time that night.  We're party people and everyone will be coming back to my room which is joined to my parents room.  So there will be 2 living rooms, 2 kitchens to entertain the bridal party and night owl family members.
  • I can understand his frustrations. The bridal suite at our hotel is almost $200 a night but we get it for free if our guests book an x amount of rooms. That's the only way we would have been able to afford staying there. I was shocked. We're getting married almost an hour away from home so it's pointless to have everyone drive back and forth the night before.
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