Everyone is an expert. Vent. Sorry.

mtnbrooke7

Why does everyone have to have a different "vision" of what my wedding "should" be like?  It is driving me crazy!!  I have been kind of overwhelmed, trying to get colors figured out and dress styles, etc etc...and seems like whenever I finally decide on something, someone will say "Oh, I always thought you'd <enter opposite of whatever I decided>!"  I am trying hard not to second guess myself, and keep in mind I cannot please everyone. There is no way I can fulfill all of their dreams of what they expected from my wedding, and I shouldn't be even trying to...I guess sometimes it would just be nice to tell someone what I finally decided on about something and have them say, "Wow, great idea!  That's going to be beautiful!".  Sigh.

CowgirlK39

Thats terrible. I have come to hate the word "should." It seems like every single person jumps up and says "Ya know what ya SHOULD do...." Do what you want. Its your wedding. People all have opinions, and if you don't like what they say, smile, nod, and go on with what you want. I was once told by someone "don't waste money on a limo. You SHOULD just make people drive themselves." I was flabbergasted by this, but all i did was smile, nod and walk right up to the limo place (we were at a bridal expo at the time) and did what I wanted.

BMcLeodTeam

Everyone always has an opinion. Try to limit who you share wedding info with, that way they you're limiting the feedback.

sparent2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_everyone-is-an-expert-vent-sorry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:3dff63cd-0503-4045-973b-899e500a560bPost:92258f79-7b75-4c50-aa81-d5b5232d511b">Re: Everyone is an expert. Vent. Sorry.</a>:
[QUOTE]Everyone always has an opinion. Try to limit who you share wedding info with, that way they you're limiting the feedback.
Posted by BMcLeodTeam[/QUOTE]

This! And is your FI helping you out? Having FI help in making choices makes me doubt myself a whole lot less. Also when my mom or FMIL have an opinion I listen then just go do it my way.

LaceyS25

I agree with you ladies on this...All I seem to hear is "Well everyone typically does this..." or "Traditionally this is how it is done..." That's all good and great and those things serve as good guidelines, but a wedding should be how you want it...whether that follows tradition or what they think things should look/be like. I am sure you will have a beautiful wedding mtnbrooke 7 so just smile and ignore all the unwanted advice...that's what I have been doing!

volleygurl0306

I agree with limiting what you tell or at least use discretion in who you tell.  I feel like when others get involved sometimes they forget it is your wedding and not the one they want/wanted.  We are planning the wedding we want, so if you decide on something and want an excited supportive answer, post it here!  We love sharing checks and aren't going to tell you to change something because then all of our weddings would be the same!

jjswin

I know it's mean but everyone should keep their opinions to themselves unless they are asked for it or are paying for it.

mtnbrooke7

Thanks, everyone.  It is really helpful to have this place to talk with other people going through the same types of things!  Also it's nice to be able to talk about wedding stuff without feeling like you're clogging someone's inbox or annoying them with endless details and questions about wedding stuff. 

BMcLeodTeam

This board is a great place when you feel the need to talk wedding

junebug19

My FSIL is great for "what about this idea"; "why don't you guys think about this?"; "Do you really want to have to do that on your wedding/RD/shower?" AFTER plans have been made. Or she will not comment on something and then I'll get e-mails forwarded to me from her & a friend who has been to my venue (and that makes her an expert on decor??) or another who has been to where we wanted to go on our HM- and didn't like it. IDK- she is my sister's problem now while they plan the shower & bachelorette I would love to be a fly on the wall during those "meetings" polar opposites!