Is it too late?

tonya246

We are getting married August 18th. We have a budget that we are trying to stay in as we don't want to go over (as I'm sure alot of brides can relate to)

Here is my issue. My fiances uncle will be marrying us. The only reason why he is marrying us is because it's his uncle. We aren't religious, we don't go to his church etc. He will be traveling (with his wife) for the wedding. I would assume that he would be making the trip even if he wasn't marrying us.

A couple months ago while we were on skype going over our wedding course material, he asked if we would be willing to help with his flight. Feeling like we were in a tight spot, and couldn't say no my fiancee said yes (thinking that it would be max $200 to "help"). We have now found out he expects us to pay for his whole flight which is over $500. To some of you this might not seem like much, but to us it is alot as it wasn't in our budget. He will be staying with my future inlaws and therefore won't be having a hotel or food bill while here. If he would have told us in the begining that he would marry us but we must pay for the flight, we would have taken it into consideration and got JOP probably.

What would you do in this situation? My fiancee thinks it's too late to say something. Do we tell him we can't afford it and try to find someone else to marry us? To me that would be a huge slap in the face. I don't even think talking to him would make a difference as we agreed to help. I feel as if he is taking advange of us.

OliveOilsMom

Could FI just tell him that $500 is out of budget?  Ask if he can just accept a $200 donation towards his flight.  If you don't want to go that route, is there anyway you can scale back other things to fit this new $500 cost into your budget.

How far away is the uncle?  Could you purchase him a train ticket instead?  That may be a cheaper option.

tonya246

I think my FI finds it hard to tell him that its out of budget beacuse we agreed to help.

Train isn't an option as it would end up costing more.

tonya246

And for cutting costs and fitting it in the budget, I have no idea where we could do that.

Gabrielle76

Well, did your FI already agree to pay the $500? Or did he just say he would think about it? If he already agreed, It hink he needs to move money around to make it happen, but if he hasn't, then he needs to tell his uncle that $500 is more than you budgeted for, though you would be happy to contribute $200.  I looked into a lot of local officiates, and they were all around $300, so I know I at least would be annoyed if a family memeber wanted even more to do it.

ElleB87

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_is-it-too-late?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:1b878c03-cfdf-44b9-a00d-bc450091d246Post:17c064f7-5398-44ce-9344-733ea2a60453">Re: Is it too late?</a>:
[QUOTE]I think my FI finds it hard to tell him that its out of budget beacuse<strong> we agreed to help</strong>. Train isn't an option as it would end up costing more.
Posted by tonya246[/QUOTE]

But that's just it...you agreed to HELP not fund the whole thing. Your FI needs to stand up to his uncle and say "there must have been some miscommunication and at this time we are only able to donate a max of 200 $ towards the cost of your transportation."