September 2012 Weddings

NWR: Job update/vent

So I posted a while back that a recruiter had called me about a job on the other side of the state. Well, I talked it over with FI and I left her a message accepting an interview. She never called back! So I called the local branches of the company she was recruiting for, and the one closest to me had nothing, but one an hour away had a possible opening. Its for a sales job in the dairy industry, but it is for a territory 2 hours away from me. I sent my resume, and I was called for an interview! I told FI that this is a way better deal, and that its closer to home and he pouted. He said he doesn't really like that area of the state, and I nearly fell over. Seriously? He began saying he won't be able to get a job, and that he likes the one he has (which is seasonal and pays beans).

I'm very torn once again. This is a job opportunity that would ensure us so much financial prosperity, and I would finally be in the career field I dream of, and he is pouting because its two counties to the East of his ideal living area. Plus, I just don't know how we would gather everything and move AND do all the wedding stuff we have left. The other frustrating thing is that FI works for the local racetrack, and the place we would be potentially living in is home to a NASCAR track. When I told him he could probably get in there, he began poo-pooing his skills and whining that he would have to go thru training to do that. I just can't believe how stuck in his ways he is!!!!

*sighs* Knottie vibes please?? lol

Re: NWR: Job update/vent

  • Lots of Knottie vibes for you.  And, if I were you, I'd tell FI to grow a pair!  I don't know your dynamic so maybe those aren't the best words, but he needs to support you in this venture!  You said you two have always talked about moving, well here is the opportunity. 
    You know my moving/job drama.  But FI moved us back to FL for seasonal work and then his "off season" work was long distance working for a MLB team.  And when he first told me I threw a FIT!  I said that it isn't the future we talked about and this isn't the life I signed up for (the long distance for all of baseball season where he works 7 days a week so we hardly see each other even when I visit).  He so badly wanted to get out of his job in VA it was like he forgot about me.  After I spoke up he revised and said it would be a 2 year max thing because I was right, it isn't the life we agreed on.  I can suck up anything for 2 year.  As you know he ended up quitting after 6 weeks because he realized how much that wasn't the life he wanted.

    I suggest looking for a furnished sublet near the new job until you get through the wedding and then move.  Could you live in between your two jobs and both have an hour commute?  Not ideal but then he doesn't have to quit his job.  The paying beans wouldn't concern me about FI's job if he is happy and you can make more with this job.  The seasonal part would.  FI may just be feeling like he has to grow up too much with the wedding and maybe finding more permanent work.  But, we all have to grow up some time.  I think you should tell your FI this would be a horrible opportunity to miss and then he is putting you guys in a career rut if you don't take it and move.  You need to fight for the life you and FI agreed upon. 

  • Can you move closer, so, you can both commute to your jobs?  Like a halfway point? 
  • I asked him how he felt about the halfway point idea and he said its not possible because we drive trucks and it would probably be hundreds in gas a week. Plus, his job has him working till 12-1am sometimes, and some days are 15 hours long, so driving an hour home wouldn't be fun or safe.
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