FI laggin..

jezpez717

So my fi is a wizard with photoshop/illustrator, so I asked him to work on our invitations....

He kind of half did them and hasnt made any sort of progress on them lately, but I keep seeing him posting on pinterest posters he is making for an etsy shop...

im glad he is working on something that will hopefully eventually bring in some money, but I really want him to finish the invitations.

I feel like every time I ask him about it he gives me this look like I am nagging him and he says he will work on it....eventually...


any suggestions on what to say to him to get him in gear?

hollyweenOR

Time for a planning meeting! Sit down with your wedding calendar, figure out together when invitations will be mailed, and work backwards from there. Estimate how long it will take to address them, add on an extra day or three to allow for some flex, and that's the invitation deadline. Lots of folks don't work well without a firm deadline. So, once the deadline is decided, be sure you both are on the same page that this is his responsibility, and then forget about it (maybe just check back w/ him a few days before the deadline). That way he knows this isn't just a 'sometime" project, but a project with a fixed end date. Then he can figure out how much time he can spend working on the Etsy stuff while still meeting the deadline! And you get to not worry!

BMcLeodTeam

When you mention it to him, do you explain why you would like them done this early? Maybe he's not thinking about time to print them, arrange them, etc.,..

mamameech

I like the planning meeting idea. This way you guys can go over all the to-dos and you can throw in the invite without it being the only thing you're "nagging" about. Set timelines for all your to-dos and make both yourselves accountable. Maybe if he sees everything you're doing, he'll step up his game

jezpez717

I was talking to him today about what we were going to do, while staring at the ever daunting craft table going on in our dinning room. So I say, oh maybe we can takle some craft projects today after we get rings. And he flat out says, well I want to finish the invite first.  YAY!

entropicbeauty

I'm currently doing this to myself.

It's actually a lot of pressure!

I'm a graphic designer, so I am holding myself to a reaaaaally high standard for my invitations and I think I've let it intimidate me! Every time I sit down to work on them, I end up working on something else.

I would maybe explain to him what the deadline is (when you need to have the invites ready to be mailed out), and then tell him you'd like them in-hand at least two weeks BEFORE that deadline so you have enough time to assemble and address. Try to be supportive and let him know you'll love anything he comes up with!

volleygurl0306

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_fi-laggin?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:95158a81-c127-4a77-ac76-4abac6389417Post:9598ee0b-550c-4f38-addf-659d8abd5484">Re: FI laggin..</a>:
[QUOTE]I was talking to him today about what we were going to do, while staring at the ever daunting craft table going on in our dinning room. So I say, oh maybe we can takle some craft projects today after we get rings. And he flat out says, well I want to finish the invite first.  YAY!
Posted by jezpez717[/QUOTE]

Glad he said this!  Nothing motivates a man like his other options being girly craft projects!  I agree with setting a deadline.  But, also maybe this is a little more serious to him than you think.  Everyone has different "this is it" moments, so if invites aren't yours they may seem like just another check to you.  I actually posted not too long ago about my anxiety about designing my own invites.  FI has been pretty hands on but said the invites were all me and whenever I'd go to do them I'd clam up.  I'm not having doubts, invites just seemed to make this wedding seem real to me and I felt overwhelmed by them.  Perhaps your FI has some of this going on.