Dinner & Reception Invitations and Reception Invitations

BeBock2013

My finacee and I are having a small issue... we have too many people that we have on our list. We do not want to cut out anyone from the list and didnt know what to do. A suggestion came up from my sister to have "reception only" invitations for those who we believe arent interested in the food, but moreso the celebration. We found this as a great idea. We believe that we came up with an idea to have 2 sets of invitations (1 for dinner reception and 1 for reception only), but we are starting to think if this will be a good idea. What or how can we do this? Has anyone ever heard of this?

Please help!

kmmssg

My stepdaughter did this in her 18 year old wisdom several years ago and offended a GREAT MANY people.  Imagine having the person next to you ask if you have the directions to the reception as you forgot yours and mention something about the dinner.  You weren't invited to the dinner.  It happened.  Whoo boy is all I have to say about that little encounter.

You need to cut your list.  Most couples have to and you are also in those shoes.  You invite everyone to everything, period.  To do so would be incredibly rude and offensive.  Do not listen to your sister on this.

SlothGoals

Lots of people have heard of this, and those who went through with it most likely lost many friends in the process.

This is essentially telling people, "You're good enough for the ceremony and for dancing, but you're not important enough to us to feed you." It's a really bad idea and you'll offend whoever you do this to.

You have options to get your situation under control: 1) Cut your guest list down; 2) Change the time of your wedding and have a cake and punch reception; 3) Find a bigger venue.

Regardless of what you decide to do you have to host all of your guests. That means whoever goes to the ceremony also attends the whole reception.

JoanE2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_dinner-reception-invitations-and-reception-invitations?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:7282f7ab-1c7a-4b75-bdad-629b6d341c5cPost:d3b5ce91-7ba4-4d95-9470-417a70379266">Dinner & Reception Invitations and Reception Invitations</a>:
[QUOTE]My finacee and I are having a small issue... we have too many people that we have on our list. We do not want to cut out anyone from the list and didnt know what to do. A suggestion came up from my sister to have "reception only" invitations for those who we believe arent interested in the food, but moreso the celebration. <strong>We found this as a great idea.</strong> We believe that we came up with an idea to have 2 sets of invitations (1 for dinner reception and 1 for reception only), but we are starting to think if this will be a good idea. What or how can we do this? Has anyone ever heard of this? Please help!
Posted by BeBock2013[/QUOTE]

This is an awful idea.  How would you feel if you were invited to the dance portion of the reception but not dinner?   You're basically inviting them to dance and celebrate and give you a gift, but you don't want to pay for a meal for them.  Tacky and rude!

You either find a venue that you can afford for everyone you want to attend or  you cut your guest list. 

HobokensFury

Ditto PP this is a horrible idea.'

[Deleted User]

I agree with PPs. This is a terrible idea and if you decide to go through with it you will lose the respect of your family and friends. Just host the maximum number of guests you and your FI can afford. 

Jen4948

It's not a "great idea" at all-it is a very rude one.

If you want someone to attend, you invite them to the whole event-not "reception only."  Unequal hospitality sends a message to those getting the lesser hospitality that you care about them less, or at least not enough to host them for the whole event, and that's hurtful.  Don't do it.

futuremrszepeda

I would feel like I was snubbing people.  Perhaps you could have an event with only appetizers and drinks so you accommodate everyone if it is for financial reasons.

QueerFemme

Agree with everyone else. This is a horrible idea. Cut your guest list or figure out a way to include everyone at the whole reception. What are your second best guests supposed to do after your ceremony while they are waiting for your first tier guests to finish dinner? What are you going to do if a second tier guest shows up a little early, only to realize that they weren't good enough for you to feed? Bad bad idea.

[Deleted User]

I wouldn't go if I were invited just for dancing, and if I did go, I would probably show up & just take advantage of the bar all night, but probably wouldn't bring a gift. It's like, you're good enough to party with but not for us to feed you and include you with the traditional events like the first dance, father/daughter dance, etc. Because you have to invite the party only guests to come late enough to miss dinner so they'll probably miss all of that. Plus where are they going to sit since they won't be there for dinner?

It's a hard thing to have to do, but cut down your invite list, or find a way to afford to invite everyone for everything that day.

Kristin789

Your sister doesn't like you.