Just need to vent about my invite fail.

bfsboo

So I come from a fairly large family. It was difficult getting everybody's address but I did the best I could from the addresses I pursued personally to the addresses my mom gave me. My mom calls today, says "Your aunt Erin called to say she got your invitation!....but are your cousins invited too? You didn't write "and family".."  Oh for cryin out loud, I just addressed them the way that my mom sent them to me. Of course my entire family is invited. But now I just look like a fool.... I did most of the 100 + invitations myself because my fiance works long hours; we also have children and I'm busy as heck because of graduating college in March *yay!*... Needless to say, my mind was fried at the end of it and I did the best I could. Now I just feel like I screwed it up because I know that's not the only invitation I failed to write "and family" on.... Sigh...

SlothGoals

It was an honest mistake! I would take a look at your list and just give a quick call/email to those you think you might have addressed without "and family" and let them know of course their children are invited. Easy peasy!

bfsboo

Yeah I agree, I'm doing damage control today.   Our family is super close and nobody has ever not been invited to anybody's wedding; that's why I didn't think to do it in the first place. It was my first real "D'oh!" wedding moment... Let's pray there's no more!!

mlg78

"And family?"  Uh, no.

You shouldn't invite "and family"...ever.  You should invite by name, not "and family"...because who I consider family vs you is completely different.  You need to be specific in your invites. So when you're doing damage control, I'd be careful who you're listing off...or you'll end up with whacky RSVPs.

bfsboo

Well "and family" would include the rest of the family that they live with, like their children. They know what I mean when I write it, so I'm not too concerned about that. Where would I list every single person's name that lives in the household? No room on the envelope or invitation... "And family" just seems easiest.

mlg78

Well, to me that would leave me wondering if that meant children in the house, can a teenage boy bring his girlfriend?  It's etiquette to list people out.  Who are you inviting, the Duggars with 19 kids?  

bfsboo

I see your points but again, where do I list all of these names?

banana468

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_just-need-to-vent-about-my-invite-fail?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:90bf9556-3d5d-40c4-b4de-7aec89f0ee89Post:e96e9174-7fe8-4376-8c28-0b743e15ebad">Re: Just need to vent about my invite fail.</a>:
[QUOTE]I see your points but again, where do I list all of these names?
Posted by bfsboo[/QUOTE]

You're supposed to put them on the invitation - either the outer envelope or on the inner envelope if you have a family with a lot of children.

Kristin789

You list the kids, age 18 and younger, on the line under the parents.  And you list the kids from oldest to youngest:

Mr. and Mrs. Luke Davis
Michael, Mark, Luke, and John
1332 Elm Street
Toledo, FL  33733

And you never use AND FAMILY.  Never.

EllenandAndy

Chill out, damage is done she already sent the invitations. Her decision to call everyone to make sure they knew who was invited is the best thing she can do right now.

And what exactly are you spossed to do when you dont have an inner envelope and you are inviting a family with 8 children!!! Im leaving it at Mr. and Mrs. John Smith and am adding a lining to the invite that will list everyone if I think there will be confusion.

lovesclimbing

I invited families with kids as "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith and family".  Perhaps that is not entirely correct but that is what we chose to do (one of the families invited has 7 kids!) and it worked fine.  No one brought random boyfriends of kids as mlg78 suggested (really?  It says "and family".  It doesn't say "and family plus so-and-so's bf").

But, whether "and family" is correct or not is irrelevant considering the invitations already went out.   I would call.

"Hi Aunt Carmen.  I heard you got our invitation and realized I forgot to list the kids names/put 'and family' on the invitation.  They are definitely invited and I really hope all of you will be able to come!"

 Or something like that.