Questions about +guest or not..

Nicole41782

So, we have such huge families that even after we cut it down the count is still about 150-160ish. The plan is unless a person has been dating someone for atleast 6 months(since we sent out the save the dates) they cant bring a guest. Its all around for friends and family. My main concern is I dont want people showing up with guests ive never met before at our wedding, and I know some friends would do that just so they dont look single.
Ok so here is a funny question, my grandmother "thinks" she has a boyfriend(haha,I laugh because they met 2 weeks ago and have gone out as a group once), so she totally confronted me asking me if he can go to the wedding(which is 5 months away). What would you ladies do seeing as no one else can bring a guest, and they arent even really dating?? My mother informed her that when we send out the invitations we will cross that bridge then.
ANOTHER quick question is.... I only have a few unmarried cousins, and I dont see them much. So I dont know if they are with anyone, and im afraid they will bring just any person. What should I do? Should I ask my Aunt if they are seeing anyone?

squirrly

Your mother had the right idea about your grandmother.  In the end, though, if it's going to make your grandmother happier, or make it easier for you or your mom if she has a companion, I'd let him come regardless of what their status is.  She's your grandmother - anybody who asks how long they've been dating or how seriously in order to have fodder for an arguement with you re: their SO is rude to begin with.

You should ask your cousins or your Aunt(s) if your cousins are dating anyone.

If you send an invitation without an "and guest" and people respond with one, just call them and let them know that you're terribly sorry, but that you weren't able to extend invitations to dates.

Your 6 month rule is a bit weird, though.  FI and I were very serious before 6 months, and I'd have been quite upset had I been invited to a wedding but not permitted to bring him.  If it were an out of town wedding, I would have been unlikely to attend as traveling solo sucks.

Also - regardless of how long they've been together, couples who live together should be invited together. 

Nicole41782

I completely agree on couples who live together should be invited!!! We have some friends that will date and be done with someone in a few months.some boys will never grow up And these certain people will not reply with no guest. They will find anyone they can to bring them. I dont think they understand how much weddings costs, they would just rather not be single.

Ok, so there is a side story to my grandmother. A friend of hers has been dating someone and after 3 months they decided to get married. At their age, who waits? Haha I am really happy for them, they seem so happy!! Its hard to put yourself out there and get remarried after being with somone for so many years(the couple are both widows). Now my grandmother is jealous. And this is why after 2 weeks she has said she has a boyfriend.

I am def going to ask my Aunts if my cousins are dating anyone. Thanks!

squirrly

Re:  your grandmother - just keep in mind - dating, to her, is likely VERY different to you.  So, jealousy or not - she may truly consider him her BF, just because they are dating and she isn't dating anyone else. 

banana468

Ditto Squirrly on all counts.

As a word  of advice, when it comes to the invitations for your friends who have a tendency to have flings, wait until you're ready to address the invitations.  You never know when someone who has a history of short relationships suddenly is ready to settle down.  A friend of mine in college NEVER dated anyone for more than 3 months.  His last year of school he met someone  and after 3 months, he was hooked!  They've been together for eight years now and married for 2 1/2 of them.

sjnsjnsjn

I've heard a 'one-year rule', never a '6-month rule' so I think you're generous!  But, in the end, it's your grandma, so if she wants a date, I'd let her bring one!