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Invites and Paper

invitations to a wedding, when the couple is already married.....

We were planning a fancy wedding, THEN they decided they couldn't wait.... so they tied the knot! 

I still want my daughter to have a ceremony so... I want to do simple invitations to a simple ceremony.   ANY IDEAS????

Thanks,
Mother of the WIFE!

Re: invitations to a wedding, when the couple is already married.....

  • There's no good way to do this. Your daughter made her decision, and had her wedding. No matter how simple it was, the ceremony she had was her wedding.

    If you do host something, it would be a vow renewal, not a wedding. As such, avoid wedding gowns, garter/bouquet tosses, and other wedding day traditions. However, assuming your daughter was recently married, it's really far too soon to host a vow renewal ceremony. If you would simply like to inform those close to your family of your daughter's marriage, the proper thing to do would be to send wedding announcements.
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  • Ditto twilight.  If they're already married, it can't be a wedding unless they get divorced in the meantime. 
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  • oh sigh, my sister-in-law is doing this, she will be having her "wedding" after she has been actually married for over 1 1/2 years....she is not backing down on the wording and only immediate family knows. So as someone going through this from the other end, please listen to PP.
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  • You can have a party to celebrate the marriage, but don't call it a wedding as she already had one.
    9.17.2010
    planning

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  • She doesn't get to have it both ways - she chose her wedding, she doesn't get another one now without getting divorced first.
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  • What kind of wedding did she have?  If it was a civil service she can have a religious blessing of her marriage, if that is something that would be meaningful to them and if a minister would agree to it.
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  • You can either invite guests to the vow renewal or the blessing of the marriage.

    But invitations should be stated so that guests clearly know that your daughter is already married.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_invitations-wedding-couple-already-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:aa6f3d01-a02a-4636-9359-ea4e10a5e397Post:3f135078-3717-48ab-a22a-77585966f68a">invitations to a wedding, when the couple is already married.....</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>We were planning a fancy wedding</strong>, THEN they decided they couldn't wait.... so they tied the knot! <strong> I still want my daughter to have a ceremon</strong>y so... I want to do simple invitations to a simple ceremony.   ANY IDEAS???? Thanks, Mother of the WIFE!
    Posted by [email protected][/QUOTE]

    Your daughter HAD a ceremony.  It was the one where they made vows to each other and were declared husband and wife.

    As grown-ups, they made the decision to elope.  Now they live with the consequences of that decision.  And that is that they don't get a do-over wedding.

    They can have a vow renewal, which I frankly think should be reserved for major milestones:  25 years or more.  Or they can have a party to celebrate their marriage.  But it's a party:  no wedding dress, first dance, cake cutting, bouquets, wedding party, etc.

    FWIW:  What does your daughter want?  I notice that the opening line of your post said WE were planning a fancy wedding.  Then you went on to say I want her to have a ceremony.  This sounds a whole lot like what YOU want, and less like what the bride and groom wanted.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    So and so invite you to a reception in honor of the recent marriage of Wife and Groom...

    Since they are already married, it is very inappropriate to have a ceremony or to try to pretend this is a wedding.  
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_invitations-wedding-couple-already-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:aa6f3d01-a02a-4636-9359-ea4e10a5e397Post:1e5bdc2d-dd63-422d-b098-11c3f15eec3c">Re: invitations to a wedding, when the couple is already married.....</a>:
    [QUOTE]So and so invite you to a reception in honor of the recent marriage of Wife and Groom... Since they are already married, it is very inappropriate to have a ceremony or to try to pretend this is a wedding.  
    Posted by MyNameIsNot[/QUOTE]

    This. If you want to have a party, I'd say something like:

    Michelle and John were married in a private ceremony on the first of August, two thousand ten.

    Please join us at a dinner reception celebrating their nuptuals on the sixth of November, two thousand ten, at six o'clock in the evening.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_invitations-wedding-couple-already-married?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:aa6f3d01-a02a-4636-9359-ea4e10a5e397Post:b8e6532a-9160-4865-96c7-02cd4ecb6246">Re: invitations to a wedding, when the couple is already married.....</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: invitations to a wedding, when the couple is already married..... : This. If you want to have a party, I'd say something like: Michelle and John were married in a private ceremony on the first of August, two thousand ten. Please join us at a dinner reception celebrating their nuptuals on the sixth of November, two thousand ten, at six o'clock in the evening.
    Posted by msmerymac[/QUOTE]


    Yup.  If there's a ceremony, it's a vow renewal.  Why are you adamant that they have another ceremony?  They did what they wanted, right?  Leave it be.
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    Dresses may be easier to take in than let out, but guest lists are not. -- kate51485
  • My husband and I eloped in March with the arrangement to have a ceremony on our two year anniversary. It is technically a vow renewal, you can google vow renewal invitation wording and a whole slew of things pop up. That's what I did. Best of luck!
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