Teacher inviting students

lrowe70

I'm a teacher and would like to invite my class to our wedding.

However there is only space for each of them and 1 parent. I'm afraid some of them may bring their entire family(one student is from a family of 13!)
How do I write the invites so it is obvious that only 1 parent is invited with the child? 
The best I've come up with so far has been:
"Child's Name and 1 Adult Guest"
but that seems sort of rude.

Any ideas? Thanks in advance

Kristin789

There was quite an uproar on ETIQUETTE when a teacher suggested inviting students, all the way to legal responsibilities and obligations.  If I were you, I wouldn't do this at all.

But if you choose to embrace all the risks and do this anyway, I like your wording.

lrowe70

legal responsibilities? Not aware of such a thread, but I am aware of several others in my district inviting the kids. One even had a big cake shaped pinata for them.
Out of curiosity I'll chck the thread, but the kids and some families already know they are invited. I'm certainly not going to un-invite anyone.

psichick

i've never understood teachers inviting their students. it's just so inappropriate on so many levels. 

tldh

When one of the attorneys in my former firm was married to a third grade teacher, they invited her class to the wedding but not the reception.  There weren't any problems and during a reception filled with personal injury attorneys and wedding plan discussions at the firm, not one thought of a single liability issue.

brilibby4

As a teacher who loves my students I can totally understand your want for inviting your students.  However, there are many liabilities to consider.  Especially if will be any alcohol at your reception.

MISSCOURTNEY20

How are there any liablities if the parents are there?? Why isn't it just like any child from the family?

I am a teacher and I would love to invite some of my students but I am not mostly because I don't want to be Ms. Lastname at my wedding!! LOL!!

And since they are your students, you can also tell them that they can only bring one parent.

achilvere

I think it's fine to invite your students.  Think about it: the public education system used to be just that-public.  Teachers were seen as an important part of the community, and in smaller cities families even used to take turns housing teachers that had just moved to the area.  Some church-associated schools still use this system.  Weddings, also, used to be much more of a community affair, with everyone than they have become in recent decades.  Yes, we live in a more litigious society now, but in a time when many public school systems are struggling with low test scores, increased drop-out rates, and poor parental involvement, I think it's wonderful that you feel so connected to your students and their families.  My mom was a kindergarden teacher for years, and she is still invited to high school graduations of some of her former students.  Since all the students will have an adult guardian there, I think you will be fine as far as liability is concerned.  As long as your school district doesn't have any rules prohibiting you from inviting your students, I say to go for it!  Also, I think the wording you have is fine.

Beachy730

I am a teacher too, but have never heard of inviting students to the reception.  I have seen some students tell their students that they are welcome to come to the ceremony if they would like.  I think that is one case where it is okay to invite someone to the ceremony and not the reception.  Honestly, I think its pretty inappropriate to invite them, but if thats what people do in your school or thats what you want, its your choice. 
If you really want the kids there then I think it is acceptable to say plus one.  It might be cute to address the invitation to the student and guest. 

P.S. You must have amazing students that you want them there.  I love my students, but I don't want them anywhere near me on my wedding day! 

angela72023

One of my daughters teachers got married last year and invited her students. We were honored that she thought enough of our children to want to share that with them. I think it's wonderful that you want to include them and your wording sounds fine, parents will understand its a space thing. We were invited to stay for the reception, it was a cake and punch reception and they got a wonderful picture of the bride (teacher) with her students (more than half the class was there).
If you want them there, go for it, and, as a mom, thanks for being a teacher!

mrb5000

I am a teacher, and I am inviting my students to the ceremony, not the reception.  There is plenty of room in the church for them and their families.  It's in the middle of the summer, so I don't think many of them will come, but I know a few that really really want to come.  I don't think there's anything wrong with it at all, and it's certainly not "inappropriate."  If you'd like to invite them, do it!

lrowe70

Thanks for all the replies.

Sounds like maybe some of you are from urban areas with education issues. I'm in a small town where I see my student's families often(grocery store, church, community events, etc...) One of their fathers is even my choropractor and another is providing the catering for the wedding.
The kids were among the first people to find out about the engagement and they ask about wedding plans often.

I love my job because of them and can't imagine celebrating without them. They've even already held a surprise shower in my honor.

I understand that maybe for some this would not be ok, but then again many people don't want any children at their weddings at all. The students have already been verbally invited and will be sent formal invites soon.
I'm not fully understanding what is "inappropriate" as many of you write. Perhaps I'm prude but, what type of weddings are you all having? Aside from my students, there will be many children at my wedding. We are even holding the reception at a hall which has an attached playground because we could on several children in attendance. I don't think of weddings as intimate or drunken affairs. They are celebrations which anyone who is involved in the person's life can attend imho. Just like I go to the kid's recitals, soccer games, Boy Scout events, and graduations, I'd like them to be at my wedding.

My question was not if I should invite them, but rather how to be sure they arrive with only 1 parent.  Looks like I will stick with my original wording and speak to the families personally at school.

MaryBethandJosh

How excited are these kids going to be when they get a formal invitation in the mail with their name first and then thier parents?!! I'm excited for them!  I think the optioin you've come up with is great. I was thinking Mrs. John Smith & Susie Smith, but that would exclude the dad. So if you're inviting the student and either of the parents then what you have works!  And I just think these kids will feel so special to get a fancy invite with their name first.

EmilyAndy2013

I am a first grade teacher and will be inviting my students to the ceremony only.  I've heard of many teachers doing this!  I teach at a Catholic school and it's a Catholic ceremony, so it's also a learning experience at that age.  Most students have never been to a wedding by age 7!  I'm doing the ceremony only, though, because I don't feel it's appropriate to invite them to the reception.  I don't want to see them out that late, and I don't want my teacher friends uncomfortable with the kids there!  They already got a hint that they may be invited to the ceremony and are very excited!