Vow Renewal Ideas

skylily

Hi Ladies!

I need some help getting people on board for a vow renewal. My husband and I have heard quite a few times that many people wish they could have been at our wedding. (FYI: We were married at the courthouse).  - We have also heard that a vow renewal that is less than 10 year is simply people asking for gifts or a "second wedding."

With that said, I have a completely differnet motive. Now this is all an IDEA. Nothing official. I'm a planner and I enjoy planning and brainstorming fun things. So this September DH and I are going to start TTC - and we are hoping its immediate. (I know its not like that, no one needs to tell me).  If all goes as I hope it does I want to throw a vow renewal for our anniversary - for our family members who regreted our decision, and a little for me to be pretty - but what I REALLY want to do is hand out the "favors" for the night to everyone at the same time - have key photographers focused on key people - and then when they open their favors they will see a cute box with a bag inside that reads STORK DELIVERY - and a small stick with a tag that reads "Due:(Expected Delivery Date) - - then when they open the bag it will have a hand crafted nest (I love crafts) and an egg inside with the baby's date/name - I hope we can put the egg in pink or blue but I don't think we'll know the sex by then... any way I wanted to tell everyone at the same time. My family is terrible about spilling the beans before I get to.

What do you think? How can I get ppl on board for the vow renewal without telling them that my real reason is to have everyone together for our great news? - - - and vow renewal or not I am thinking of doing something similar if we don't get pregnant right away. Only trouble with that is - the majority of our family will not come to some backyard picnic. But a vow renewal would be a bigger event that our family would actually want to attend. - - I just have no idea how to take the next step in brainstorming how I can explain to family why we want a vow renewal and why they should be there. Thoughts?  

HobokensFury

Please don't take this the wrong way but this seems very self indulgent and attention whorish.  It looks like you want to make a big production out of something very simple.  What happens if you don't get pregnant?

Summer2011Bride

I would also caution against doing this. For this to even work, a lot of things would have to happen as planned, and as we all know, life rarely happens according to plan. Even if you did get pregnant as soon as you think, I agree (not trying to be rude, just honest) that it seems a little AW and very over-the-top.

How long have you been married? IMO, you made a decision about your wedding and even though other people were unhappy about that decision, it's what you did and you should own it. If you want a big anniversary party (even if it's a first or second anniversary party), I wouldn't side-eye that as much. Just keep it casual, have good food and good times with family and friends.

HandBanana

I agree with PP about it coming off as VERY AWish. Also, I don't think my MIL or my mom would be happy if I announced my pregnancy like this.

Gabrielle76

I'm always wary of announcing pregnancy in showy ways, mostly because so much can go wrong.  Additionally, as PP's said, It's pretty AWish. If I went to a vow renewal (which I honestly don't understand before 15-25 years of marriage) and someone announced their pregnancy like that I would roll my eyes into next week.  I've never undestood the problem with family sharing news with other family, it''s just how news travels.

Wait until Junior is born and then have a big party to introduce him/her to your family and friends. 

skylily

Thank you for your opinions. 

I stated in my first post that if I didn't get pregnant right away to do this idea I was going to have a backyard picnic. I also stated that I know life doesn't work out the way we plan. I plan anyway and when life throws a curveball I modify my plans. No big deal. 

I guess I was so caught up in the fun of the surprise that I didn't think about it being AWish. I definitely don't want that. A part of me thought too that so many people were upset about us not having a show that I wanted to give em a show they would remember. 

About the family telling family - I wouldn't have a problem with that ordinarily, but I'm sick and tired of the "you told X first!" - - and they don't say it in a joking manner. I thought this would be a fun way to tell everyone at the exact same time. ...

I'll figure something else out. Thanks everyone.

Naphia

I know I'm late - but I think your idea is GREAT! It's not attention grabbing at all.  You want your closest friends and family to join you in your happiness, I don't see anything wrong with that.  And I'm sure your guest will love it as well.  My only suggestion is that you wait until you're at least 3 months pregnant before you tell everyone, so maybe you should push back the ceremony.  Other than that, I think it's a great idea!

Julie2013

Skylily, two things stood out to me with this post. One being that you were thinking about doing the vow renewal no matter what might happen with a pregnancy. The second, that your family complained about missing your wedding and would WANT to attend a vow renewal.  If you and your family & friends would love doing/attending a vow renewal, you should do it!  I refuse to believe anybody here knows your family & friends better than you do.  And if you think they will love it, they probably will. 

As for the announcing a pregnancy part, I don't see anything wrong there, either.  If your pregnancy works with the timing of the renewal, why not?  If you miscarry and it doesn't bother you that other people know that, too, then it's no problem.  I've had 3 miscarriages and 4 children.  My sister-in-law went through similar problems.  We didn't mind other people knowing our ups and downs with that.  If you are a more private person, it probably isn't a good idea, but I doubt you'd be contemplating this if you were.

Good luck with your plans!

Julie 

Julie2013

Skylily, are you still thinking about a vow renewal? Knot Lili is researching the need for a Vow Renewal board here at TK Community. She told me to get the word out that she'd like opinions PMed to her about whether we'd like to have one or not. I think it's a wonderful idea and hope it happens! If you can, would you mind dropping her a PM in support of the idea? It would be great to have a place we can chat about things specific to renewals. You can PM her by going to http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_budget-weddings_intro-to-knot-lili and looking at the bottom of her intro post. I hope you'll do it!

Julie

skylily

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_vow-renewal-ideas-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:21faba1d-0fae-4373-af41-6ebe686dd7dfPost:7910c048-c207-4c2c-af53-36365378ddc2">Re: Vow Renewal Ideas</a>:
[QUOTE]Skylily, are you still thinking about a vow renewal? Knot Lili is researching the need for a Vow Renewal board here at TK Community. She told me to get the word out that she'd like opinions PMed to her about whether we'd like to have one or not. I think it's a wonderful idea and hope it happens! If you can, would you mind dropping her a PM in support of the idea? It would be great to have a place we can chat about things specific to renewals. You can PM her by going to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_budget-weddings_intro-to-knot-lili">http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_budget-weddings_intro-to-knot-lili</a> and looking at the bottom of her intro post. I hope you'll do it! Julie
Posted by Julie2013[/QUOTE]

<div>Yes, perhaps I will throw in my opinion. Thank you. </div>

Julie2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_vow-renewal-ideas-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:21faba1d-0fae-4373-af41-6ebe686dd7dfPost:45dc3111-4a83-4fa2-98e9-4e61134eaf59">Re: Vow Renewal Ideas</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Vow Renewal Ideas : Yes, perhaps I will throw in my opinion. Thank you. 
Posted by skylily[/QUOTE]

I appreciate it, skylily! Thanks!

Julie