BM drama/vent

Carson386

One of my BMs got married last December. I let her borrow a silver bracelet with blue in it that my mother had given me. I didn't ask for it back the night of the wedding but figured that I could get it back when they were settled in. Since then, I've been asking for it and she has been moving around quite a bit lately and kept telling me she would get it to me when they were unpacked. I asked again today if she has come across it yet, she claims she gave it back already and that if I don't trust her and thinking that she is stealing my stuff, then maybe she shouldn't be a bridesmaid and now wants me to pay her the money for the dress she already bought. At this point, all I really care about is my bracelet, it was my great grandmothers, then my mothers, and then mine. I never claimed that she stole it, it's driving me crazy.

jmozul01

Hmm sounds like she either lost it, doesn't want to give it back, or doesn't want to be a BM? Or maybe she just had a bad day?

turtleslove

Sounds like there is something deeper or something else going on.. If you have not accused her of anything or been mean to her there is no reason for her to flip out like that.. Did it have any value? Or did she lose it?

Carson386

I don't know. I really wish that if she lost it, she would just be honest with me. If she just wants to keep it and is being like this, I would seriously consider asking her to not be a bridesmaid since it is a very expensive piece of jewelry and I can't get another one. I actually had it apraised last year, and I know it's really rude and a friendship ending move, but I would do it for this piece (not only the cost of it but also the fact that it's been passed down in my family).

ameliah19

I'm weary of people and it definitley sounds like she's hiding something from you and trying to make it seem like it's your fault (ie: you don't trust her). It seems like she either lost it or does not want to give it back to you. Do you think you will speak to her about it again?

Carson386

I'm going to ask her once more when things cool down. I'm pretty angry because she posted a picture on Facebook of her wearing it. She posted it today after I talked to her and the caption says moving into the new house (which was the end of June). I haven't seen her since she moved. I'm going to point out that I saw it in the picture and if she still denies it, I'll be the bad one and ask her to step down.

melb2013

Wow this sounds nuts.  Do you think that was a recent photo?

Carson386

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2013-weddings_bm-dramavent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:ea657a87-d1dc-4588-999f-31c9deeef720Discussion:b47196b7-b2ee-478f-897a-c4c356f6dfd1Post:ce65806c-8d65-46a0-9016-81d4e6189a97">Re: BM drama/vent</a>:
[QUOTE]Wow this sounds nuts.  Do you think that was a recent photo?
Posted by melb2013[/QUOTE]

I believe her that the picture was probably taken in the days after they moved, they had quite a few boxes in the background but, I don't know why she would put it up after I asked about it today unless she was trying to show it off to me.

MamaBear904

Wow. Sounds really immature on her part. I'd give it a couple days (for you to calm down) and if possible, would try to go see her. It would be easier for her to lie by phone or text than to lie to your face. Does she know the value this bracelet has to you?

Carson386

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2013-weddings_bm-dramavent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:ea657a87-d1dc-4588-999f-31c9deeef720Discussion:b47196b7-b2ee-478f-897a-c4c356f6dfd1Post:716246bb-b1bc-416f-9b15-3b47e5825131">Re: BM drama/vent</a>:
[QUOTE]Wow. Sounds really immature on her part. I'd give it a couple days (for you to calm down) and if possible, would try to go see her. It would be easier for her to lie by phone or text than to lie to your face. Does she know the value this bracelet has to you?
Posted by MamaBear904[/QUOTE]

She knows that it's very important because of the meaning behind it and how long it has been in my family. I've never told her the actual cash value of it.

SSaltzman87

That sounds really shady to me. I agree with the others on there being more to it than her not getting it back to you. I wouldn't blame you for ending the friendship/taking her out of the bridal party over this- it's definitely one of the VERY rare times that it's ok to boot a BM. It's a family heirloom, not a sweater.

aprahamian2

I can't even imagine how angry I'd be. Sorry about this. Hope there is some way you can get it back.

AMISSA31

I would copy and paste that picture ( and caption) from Facebook before she deletes it.  That way you have proof. 

sbc2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2013-weddings_bm-dramavent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:ea657a87-d1dc-4588-999f-31c9deeef720Discussion:b47196b7-b2ee-478f-897a-c4c356f6dfd1Post:502d1935-49eb-4797-b216-68388ba3ab67">Re: BM drama/vent</a>:
[QUOTE]I would copy and paste that picture ( and caption) from Facebook before she deletes it.  That way you have proof. 
Posted by AMISSA31[/QUOTE]

<div>I agree. There's also no freaking way I'd pay her back for the dress. </div>