I know I posted this in my other thread, but I wanted to make sure everyone got to see it...thanks again!
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First off, I just wanted to thank everyone so much for their kinds words, thoughts, prayers, and sympathy during this difficult time for our family. While it was obviously a terrible tragedy, it is times like this when it is most important to count our blessings for what we have left. Right now we are mourning the loss of our FBIL, but somewhere out there there is another family mourning the loss equivalent to losing FBIL, FSIL, and our niece. I saw the mangled, bloody wreckage of the 2 vehicles invovled in the accident and it is no small miracle that FSIL and our niece not only survived, but did so with very minor injuries. There were more major injuries sustained in the other vehicle, but from what I understand all the other passengers lived.
As many of you probably gathered over many months of posting, FI and I are not emotional people so at times like these we feel very conflicted and strange. Some moments I can't help but cry, some brief moments I forget about what has happened and then in a split second it washes back over me all over again, and although I'd never tell anyone but FI some brief moments I get angry - ("he has a daughter who is almost one years old, and he doesn't have life insurance??", "why-oh-why wasn't he wearing his damn seatbelt?!", "if only he had been paying more attention while driving!"). These moments pass briefly, but I suppose that is just part of the grieving process.
And I know that everyone says nice things about people after they die, but FBIL was truly one of the nicest, happy-go-lucky people I've ever met. He'd give the shirt off his back to a stranger if they needed it. His family and friends were first priority and the love & support extended to FSIL & our family and FBIL's family has been nothing short of overwhelming, even from complete or near strangers (and I'm not just talking about you guys, either). Every time we saw him after we got engaged FBIL always talked about how excited he was for the wedding, and while it will be difficult not having him there I know he would want us to celebrate our marriage and not mourn his passing on our wedding day. I'm not particularly close to my brother or any cousins, so I'd come to look forward to hanging out with FBIL/FSIL because there was this awesome family dynamic there that I'd never experienced before. It will be one of the things I will miss the most.
Anyways, I'd also like to thank you guys for some of the suggestions that you've already made. I know I'll be asking for a lot of input back from you guys in the coming weeks relating to the wedding as there are really no guidelines in a situation like this, and while I want to honor his memory I don't want to turn our wedding into a sad day for everyone. I know I told myself I wasn't going to start even thinking about how we'll need to make adjustments for the wedding until next week, but I already feel very lost as to what I should do (but I know you guys will help me with that).