got a +1 *vent*

kushie77

So I just got my last hold out from my Aunt for the RSVP's and she wrote 3.  She brought her 10 year old granddaughter uninvited to the shower and I was pretty clear then that there was no children being invited to the wedding and here she replied 3.  Any advice that on how to handle this one gently?

mandi921vh

I would just call her and explain that you are sorry for the confusion but the invite was only for her and you cannot accommodate additional guests. I guess you are assuming she added her 10 year old granddaughter, but do you know who the other person is?

kushie77

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_got-a-1-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:98c987e0-70b8-4ad9-8c7d-514d253ecf9bPost:f740c27e-27b6-4cac-92b3-74606f1cefad">Re: got a +1 *vent*</a>:
[QUOTE]I would just call her and explain that you are sorry for the confusion but the invite was only for her and you cannot accommodate additional guests. I guess you are assuming she added her 10 year old granddaughter, but do you know who the other person is?
Posted by mandi921vh[/QUOTE]

My uncle.  The Invite was addressed  Mr and Mrs so and so.....

caitlinc09

At this point with all of these rude people my answer is just punch them in the face. Obviously this isn't an option, but I'm getting so sick of all of us having to deal with this crap! Doesn't anyone have manners anymore?

Agree with PP, just say that you're sorry there was confusion but you weren't planning on having children and the guest list is very tight and you can't have any extras there. 

ladychambers83

Just be honest with her. My aunt just did the same thing adding my little cousin although It clearly states Adult Only on the invitation.... She sounded upset that she didnt get her way although she said she understood, but you have to put your foot down..

IRJDLH514

we had a couple of them people don't understand if there was extra room maybe they would of gotten an invite. Not sure why but people must not have manners anymore, and its getting so annoying.

LilyWater09

Bear with me, but did you stop and ask yourself WHY she brought the granddaughter along?  I say this because I am in the same situation, but I asked WHY.  I found out because the mother of the kids is a no-good person and the kids live with them.  Now could they find a babysitter - maybe.  But take a little time and concern yourself with WHY first before you just flip out that some one is not attentive your wishes.  The big day is about family being there to support you. 

deanabuonincontri

I am sorry...it does not matter who the extra person is or why she added them on.  If your aunt truly had some type of issue (such as she absoutely HAS to bring the granddaughter bc her mom sucks and there was no babysitter, etc, etc ,et) she could have called you and said:

Bride to be, thank you so much for inviting me and uncle (im assuming the mr. and mrs. you sent the invite to is your aunt and uncle) to your special day.  We would absoutely love to attend however we are having x family emergency and I wanted to make you aware that granddaughter now lives with us.  I do not want to impose however, I wanted to see if children were invited to the wedding and if I could bring said granddaughter.

Your aunt calling and asking is still a bit awkward but its not as rude as just assuming. I mean you guys are family, so in my book she should be able to call you and ask a question...however she should have the decency to (1) ASK first before assuming and inviting who know whos. and (2) respect whatever your answer is.

Again, i dont care who she added or why, its just plain rude! call her up and say:

I am so happy that you and uncle can make it to wedding. we are looking forward to sharing this special day with you.  I noticed that you rsvp'd for three. Unfortunately, both our venue and budget cannot accomdate any extra guests.  We must be firm with our original guest list. I apologize for any issues and understand if you cant make it, however we can only accomodate you and uncle. hope you will both still join us!

good luck!

kushie77

So I called and talked to her and her reply was b/c jade wants to see you get married.  I explained the no kids b/c we can't include one and not others and we can't afford to invite everyone's kids.  She has childcare, it's not this issue. they just never say no to the kid and she gets whatever she wants when she wants it.  I was told well I'm bringing her and there's nothing you can do about, she wants to come and I 'm not going to tell her no.   So I told her I am sorry but the invite was for you and Uncle and that she cannot come.  So she said fine, none of us will come.   Oh well.........

deanabuonincontri

sorry you had to deal with this! but I am so proud of you for standing your ground and not giving in! giving in would have caused more problems....parents would have seen the child there and wondered why their own child wasnt invited. it really is your aunts loss. sorry she is being so selfish but you are better off. enjoy your day!  you wont even notice that she isnt there!

gpapale1

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_got-a-1-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:98c987e0-70b8-4ad9-8c7d-514d253ecf9bPost:4caea7c7-3a0e-43c9-b1ef-af5e3ac9a1d5">Re: got a +1 *vent*</a>:
[QUOTE]So I called and talked to her and her reply was b/c jade wants to see you get married.  I explained the no kids b/c we can't include one and not others and we can't afford to invite everyone's kids.  She has childcare, it's not this issue. they just never say no to the kid and she gets whatever she wants when she wants it. <strong> I was told well I'm bringing her and there's nothing you can do about, she wants to come and I 'm not going to tell her no.   So I told her I am sorry but the invite was for you and Uncle and that she cannot come.  So she said fine, none of us will come.   Oh well.........</strong>
Posted by kushie77[/QUOTE]

Wow, how rude can she get!  That is absolutely uncalled for, and I'm so sorry you have to deal with someone like that.  It sounds like your aunt is one for temper tantrums as well...hopefully she'll come to her senses and find a sitter for the brat.