victory check and question about bachelorette party

soon to be mrs pham

victory

 i found help! fiance, moh's husband and mom and some other family! yay!

check 

finished my ribbon board!

(will post a pick later) fiance helped me with it it was a nice project to do together he even picked out the colors!

question 

moh has said even though she is to ill to throw the bachelorette she will pay if i plan the event. i've never been to one before. not even sure what happens at one... is there anything that should happen? someone asked me what kind of gift i want... is this typical? i thought i gave them gifts at the bacherlette... 

i figures to cut costs i would just have her do dave and busters and say 5 dollars on a card for them to play games and if they want to play more bring money? is this proper?

mandi921vh

Glad you found some helpers, congrats on the checks!

LBug24

Congrats on the checks!

As for bach. parties, it's what you/your girls would like.. that obviously varies from girl to girl and their interests/ideas of "fun"

Dave and Busters sounds like a good time if that's what you want! It's typically (in my experience) not just ONE person fronting the cost of everything, so it makes sense for everyone to split it/pay for their own way.

soon to be mrs pham

oh so if i cay cost of x party try at d & b is_____ then they all should pay equally?

toothpastechica

congrats on the checks! Its my understanding that at bachlorette parties everyone pays for themselves (think club night...you dont usually pay for all your friends drinks unless its a b-day or something...the same thing here, everyone pays for themselves, its commen that people pay for the bride, but not required). I have only ever seen bridesmaids and groomsmens gifts given either at the rehersal dinner or on the morning of the wedding while getting ready.

bpphoto785

I agree the bachelorette should be whatever you want it to be (and whatever your friends can afford!). 

I've seen it done a few ways. One is everyone pays their own way, you just go out and split the check/everyone pays for their own drinks or whatever. 

The other is you figure out the cost for everyone and tell them it will be $X which includes whatever (hotel, dinner, transportation).

Then either the BP or everyone helps cover the cost of the bride. The BP does not have to pay for everyone at the bachelorette. 

It's up to you if you want to set up a package with D&B (which usually includes food & a game card) and tell everyone it will cost $X or you just want to tell them to meet you for dinner and games and they pay for whatever they eat/drink/play. 

soon to be mrs pham

thanks! thats so much better!

AurorasEnvy

Depending on what you & your friends are into, I've heard of anything from a limo+night out on the town, weekend at a cabin, wine tastings, mani/pedis, dinner, shows, etc.  For me we are just dressing up & going bar hopping in downtown Milwaukee and we all have hotel rooms.

As far as cost goes, for the parties I've been to everyone pays their own way and a portion of the bride's.  Gifts are usually given to the bride, not the bride giving everyone else gifts.  Usually lingerie, "adult" things, or just a small gift.  Not everyone has to bring a gift, though.  For one of my BM's b-party, her mom made garters that said "bachelorette party" on them for all the girls attending to wear.  They were super cute and I thought it was a fun idea!

If you do Dave & Buster's, I don't think you have to give them any money to play with.  It's a nice gesture, but like PPs have said it is more of a party for the bride & to give the bride a few gifts =]

dori851

Congrats on the check!

About the bachelorette party -- I would definitely have everyone you're inviting pay equally. That way, your MOH (who can't even attend) won't be stuck with a huge bill! I think Dave & Busters sounds like a great idea as long as that's what you want to do There is nothing that you're "supposed" to do at a bachelorette party, it's all about what YOU want to do! I know some people like to go out to the bars, while others don't like the bar scene. So, there are lots of different options! GL & have fun planning it