June 2013 Weddings
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Invite two-faced "friend"?

"Maggie" a former coworker (someone I thought was my friend) invited me and another coworker "Linda" to lunch last year. While we were together, she asked Linda, "How's 'David' doing?" "David" is our former coworker and my ex-boyfriend. Linda looked surprised and said, "Umm, he got married last month." So Maggie went on about how happy she was for him and how she hoped he would have lots of kids because he always wanted a big family.

Now, I know damn well she must have already known about this wedding because her sister is David's boss. So I'm thinking she found out about it and decided to call me out of the blue for a get-together just to rub my nose in it. He dumped me in 2004. It's ancient history. But the fact that she would do that to intentionally hurt me is unforgiveable. It didn't occur to me until later, or I probably would have blown up at the time. It's kind of a moot point now that I'm engaged, but I feel like she was doing it because Evan and I had been together over 6 years and he hadn't proposed yet, which she happily brought up after asking all about David's wedding in Hawaii.

She's remained my FB friend. She's constantly asking about my wedding plans. She's the one who got me involved in Scrabble and tournaments in the first place, so technically, I wouldn't have met FI if it hadn't been for her.

Part of me wants to invite her just to rub HER nose in it. She hasn't dated anyone since I've known her (1997). But part of me wants to invite everybody but her. Now that I think about it, I remember she called me the day David got another job. Why would she do that? Honestly, I care about what's going on in his life about as much as I care about what the cast of Happy Days is doing.

I think I'm just going to leave her off the guest list and if she asks about it, I'll tell her the truth.


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Re: Invite two-faced "friend"?

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    I'm sorry you have a friend who is such a pain! I wouldn't invite her either, but I don't know if I would tell her the reason why if she asked me. I'd probably go with the whole budget/guest list limitation reason. It just sounds like she's the type of person who'd blow it all out of proportion and get your other friends involved if you tell her the real reason she's not there. That's just my opinion though, but I totally understand how this whole situation is annoying.
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    She sounds like a terrible person!  Not only would I leave her off the guest list, I would also "un-friend" her on FB and I would never speak to her again.  You don't need toxic people like that in your life.  She sounds like she is bitter and lonely and has nothing better to do than make everyone else as miserable as she is.
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    Don't invite her. Rub it in her face by showing off pictures and talking about how amazing your wedding was after the fact. If she wants to be passive agressive I say give it right back to her. I'm a b!tch like that though. 
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    I am definitely with Courtney on this one, I am the exact same way, I would give it right back to her and post tons of pictures. I also wouldnt invite her because you are supposed to have the most supportive people in your life at your wedding, not people who are deliberately trying to hurt your feelings.
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    Honestly I knew my opinion as soon as I opened this post.  No, she shouldn't be invited.  After reading, I still hold true to that first judgement opinion, and do not think she needs to be there to be all negative on your happiest day.  There is a chance she would find some way to ruin it!
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    I agree with the other posters. Don't invite her. There is no point in inviting someone who will possibly try to ruin or put down your wedding.
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    I wouldn't waste my money on feeding her so I don't think you should invite her. It dpesn't sound like she's much of friend. Don't waste your time on her.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_invite-two-faced-friend?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:0d1c7a53-95ff-46ae-82fb-e52a0410da0aPost:9e6389ce-9887-4b65-9163-919d5d5c1cb0">Invite two-faced "friend"?</a>:
    [QUOTE]"Maggie" a former coworker (someone I thought was my friend) invited me and another coworker "Linda" to lunch last year. While we were together, she asked Linda, "How's 'David' doing?" "David" is our former coworker and my ex-boyfriend. Linda looked surprised and said, "Umm, he got married last month." So Maggie went on about how happy she was for him and how she hoped he would have lots of kids because he always wanted a big family. Now, I know damn well she must have already known about this wedding because her sister is David's boss. So I'm thinking she found out about it and decided to call me out of the blue for a get-together just to rub my nose in it. He dumped me in 2004. It's ancient history. But the fact that she would do that to intentionally hurt me is unforgiveable. It didn't occur to me until later, or I probably would have blown up at the time. It's kind of a moot point now that I'm engaged, but I feel like she was doing it because Evan and I had been together over 6 years and he hadn't proposed yet, which she happily brought up after asking all about David's wedding in Hawaii. She's remained my FB friend. She's constantly asking about my wedding plans. She's the one who got me involved in Scrabble and tournaments in the first place, so technically, I wouldn't have met FI if it hadn't been for her. Part of me wants to invite her just to rub HER nose in it. She hasn't dated anyone since I've known her (1997). But part of me wants to invite everybody but her. Now that I think about it, I remember she called me the day David got another job. Why would she do that? Honestly, I care about what's going on in his life about as much as I care about what the cast of Happy Days is doing. I think I'm just going to leave her off the guest list and if she asks about it, I'll tell her the truth.
    Posted by sopraffina[/QUOTE]

    What a b****! Or a two faced back stabbing b****! Sorry for the language but I hate people like that. It is like my friend she tries to give advice about marriage and kids. Which she has no damn kids. Why? I would leave her off the guest list and my friendship.

     
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    Honestly i would invite her, my mom told me that its okay for me to invite a couple of haters! Hahahahaaa!! I have a few on FI side of the family....they can come and hate some more ;)
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