I'm trying so hard not to choke my sister...

SugarFoote

Me and my older sister have never really gotten along. I mean one minute we are like best friends, and the next I can't stand her. 90% of the time we lean more to the can't stand each other side of things.
Well she is one of my BM's. I'm completely happy with her being one. But here lately I would almost swear that she is trying to screw everything up and start drama. Whenever the wedding is mentioned, she talks nonstop about how much she hates another BM. She has never even talked to her. So this makes no sense to me. I already had to tell her that I didn't want her to go dress shopping with me. I did it in a nice way explaining that I wanted it to just be me and mom. I thought she would understant that because she banned me from her shopping because she claimed I would "take the attention from her". which is complete bs. The reason I didn't want her to go is because she is so negative about everything and makes fun of my butt because apparently in her eyes, it is too big. So I just don't want to deal with that, so she isn't going and now she is pissed about that.
The last straw was today when she told me that her and her husband were going to start trying to get pregnant in October. My first reaction was "This October?" She said yes. I mentally counted. My wedding is in June. If she just happens to get pregnant in October, then she would be around 8 months prego in the wedding. I explain this to her and do you know what she said?!? "I know. Wouldn't it be funny if I went in to labor at your wedding?" Umm no. Actually that wouldn't be funny. She thinks it would be because then our parents would leave my wedding to go with her to the hospital.  WTH? Who flippin does that? The Church we are getting married at is in the middle of nowhere. No cell phone service. Hospital is like a gazillion miles away. Why would anyone want to risk that? And she thinks its funny. I don't feel like she should be allowed to reproduce. I'm sorry if I seem dramatic about this but I'm just so upset. Nothing is going good this week...

FutureMrsPrice2013

Wow! Was she like that when you got engaged at first? If she has always been a 'Negative Nancy' why would you invite drama on your special day? It definately seems like she is wanting your day to fail epically

sparkles776

I am so sorry. Sometimes things are complicated with sibilings. It seems to me like she wants all the attention to be on her. I wouldnt feel bad about banning her from dress shopping with you, you need positive energy around you that day and especially if she didnt allow you to go with her, I wouldnt worry about it too much. As for her getting pregnant, remember that no one will care about your wedding as much as you and your FI will. No one. Not even family. So dont expect her to hold off on getting pregnant if thats what she really wants just because of your wedding.  Although it sounds like she deliberatly is trying to mess up your plans, I would just say well, I guess if you are 8 months pregnant at my wedding, I guess you will just have to stay at home since there are no hospitals nearby. I would just try to keep wedding talk at a minimum around her.

KplusA

OMG when I read this I immediately thought of my sister!!!!  I am going through the same crazy stuff!  My sister is younger, but we always are either best friends or fighting horribly.  I talked to her and let her know that I was going to make my best friend since 9th grade my Maid of Honor, and she was totally fine with that.  I still have her as a bridesmaid.  But she has been very negative and horrible since I started wedding planning.  She refuses to wear a yellow bridesmaid dress (my colors are yellow and white), and when I showed her my photographer (who is AMAAAZING!) she complained about her nonstop for 10 minutes.  I eventually had to get off the phone because she made me so upset.  Also, since picking out my venue (a mansion in a state park in PA), she has started planning her wedding and picked out a mansion in a state park in DE for her wedding.  Whenever I tell people where my wedding is, she interrupts and tells them where her wedding will be.  Did I mention that she is currently single?  The final straw was when I went to my mom's house to show her my wedding dress for the first time.  My mom got out her dress and veil and put her veil on my head.  We were both holding each other and crying, and then my sister walks in the room WITH MY MOM'S WEDDING DRESS ON!  She kept the dress on all day and kept telling everyone how beautiful she felt as a bride!  I have actually stopped talking to her about wedding plans, because she either tears my ideas apart, or she interrupts me and tells me that she is already doing that for her wedding in the future.  It's really tough for me.  I know exactly how you feel!

I honestly don't know what to tell you, except maybe to stop talking to her about the wedding as well.  I don't want this to sound harsh, but it sounds like she is really trying to ruin your big day.  I don't know why sisters have to be this way sometimes!  Your wedding plans sound great and I think you should stay positive - the only people who do or say mean things are probably just jealous and wish they could have such an awesome wedding!  And I know how important it is to include your sister in your planning, but I would just talk to your mom/close friends about it from now on!  I hope your week gets better!

Meghannsix

Wow, my sister "politely declined" being a bridesmaid in my wedding.  I've been pretty bummed about it, I guess I should be happy I'm not dealing with any of this?

SugarFoote

She has always been somewhat like this, but it has gotten way worse. She's made because she's going to have to wear a orange bridesmaids dress. In her words, since she intends on being pregnant at my wedding, she is going to "look like the great pumpkin". She claims she will just wear one of the other colors.
Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for her and her husband, but I don't feel like she's going about the pregancy the wrong way. So I guess if she gets knocked up to where she's going to be extremely prego at the wedding, I will gladly kick her out I know that is mean and terrible but if she wants to play this way, little sister can too. Its to the point to where I don't really think of her as a sister. So I would pretty much welcome no contact with her for quite sometime.

FutureMrsPrice2013

smh...glad I'm an only child lol

Chels&Jimmy

Wow! I'm stunned by the behavior of Sugar and K's sisters. I'm so sorry you ladies have to deal with that. My sister and I have had our differences - our tense moments, our blow-out fights, etc. but she would never create drama around my wedding. A few years ago we had a talk about our MOH's for our future weddings. I told her that I had promised my best friend we would be each other's MOH many, many years beforehand, and it turned out that she had made the same promise with her own best friend... so we had a mutual understanding about the MOH thing. I brought it up to her again after I got engaged to make sure we were still on the same page and we were. Of course she is a BM. She has offered several times to help with planning and crafts and said she would drive down to San Diego from Anaheim to go dress shopping with me. She was a huge help when FI and I took our engagement photos last week (i.e. getting us into Disneyland for free because she works there, letting us use her cast member discount for food, helping carry out many bags of clothes and shoes around.) I know we don't get along sometimes and we frustrate the hell out of each other, but with regard to wedding stuff there has been no issues at all.

Klyn1983

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2013-weddings_im-trying-so-hard-not-to-choke-my-sister?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f30b0bfc-508d-415c-bf59-ab83e327da37Discussion:22ca14cd-1de5-4e67-ac06-f4522776db3fPost:a35a36b7-dffd-4113-8913-c5f0015846c0">Re: I'm trying so hard not to choke my sister...</a>:
[QUOTE]Wow, my sister "politely declined" being a bridesmaid in my wedding.  I've been pretty bummed about it, I guess I should be happy I'm not dealing with any of this?
Posted by Meghannsix[/QUOTE]

<div>My sister just backed out of being a bridesmaid so I completely understand how you are feeling. </div>

iloveu4ever

Sorry what's so damn funny about it? Is she always like that?

renoclaf

I totaly get why this has upset you but try to keep in mind that that senerio is totally unlikely and it really could take a while for her to get pregnant as well.  I mean it kinda sucks and sounds like she's trying to make sure the attention will always be on her but I wouldnt worry about her going into labour on your dance floor.

SAW2008

Truth is, sometimes people just don't like to see someone else happy...and that's sad especially since this is your sister. However, do not let her ruin this experience for you...this is you and your fiance's day and you should be enjoying the entire process. My sister got a bit of an attitude when I told her that it was time to start planning. I politely told her "I love you but I will gladly relieve you of all your MOH duties" I just don't have time for it. She straightened up...QUICK! This is your sister and I know you love her but don't let her ruin this for you. Happy planning my dear.