June 2013 Weddings

Just need some hope from fellow June 2013 Brides!

Hi I got engaged on New years Eve 2012 and I am planning my wedding for June 2013 as far as the date goes I'm not sure!!his family is a big part of this for him and many live out of state so we've changed from may originally to early June but now it's seems late June will be the date!im so aggravated trying to please everyone in his family!!me and mine seem to have no say on the date!im the bride!i thought it was my decision mostly..I love him and his mother but geez..I also feel like the wedding is forever away from now..I'm already stressed out and were only three months engaged!Help any advice?

Re: Just need some hope from fellow June 2013 Brides!

  • First of all, congratulations on your engagement. My FI proposed to me on New Years as well (and we're not the only ones here). I understand your frustrations with trying to please everyone. My FI and I are from different states so it's been a struggle to get everyone to come to terms with which city to have the wedding in.

    A very important thing to understand is that yes, you're the bride, but you aren't the only one getting married. I catch myself with FI saying that it's "my" wedding when it's actually "our" wedding. You aren't going to agree on everything, and that's to be expected. Marriage will be the same way. The key, in my opinion, is compromise. Yes, it's one of the most important days of your life, but it's huge for the families as well. I'm sure your FMIL doesn't mean any harm. She just wants to be involved in such an important event for you and her son. If you find yourself getting frustrated, pause and take 10 seconds to breathe.

    I know late June seems like forever away, but it's really not in the long run. I log onto TK every day and see that countdown of days go down. Remember that there's a lot to do to plan a wedding so you need as much time as you can use. Every moment, you're a little closer to being a Mrs. so try to look at it that way instead of how far away it seems.

    Sorry if this was just a lot of rambling with no help. I hope you can get something out of my huge response.
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  • I feel your pain.  I have a huge family, and I love them and they are sooo awesome.  They also are really easy going and don't care at all about anything I am throwing their way, for example we are not having 2nd cousins or anyone under 10 except for bridal party members.  My family is totally cool with it all and understand.

    Now FI's family, totally different story.  In the beginning the guest list was the hardest thing (and even still months later I have resentment over some issues) and I fought with his parents over people.  I can't get it across to them that we need to be fair on both sides of the family, and we are limited by space.  I gave in a little bit just to keep the peace, and unfortunately that might be what you have to do.  Also, he has extended family that is upset by our 2nd cousin and under 10 rule, but its the only way to get in the other people his parents said "HAD" to be there.

    Long story short, you can't please everyone.  It is not possible, because I had to cut some of my dads friends to have his parents great uncles or something (mind you I cant have them on my side...) so not only is my dad unhappy (but cool about it) I am unhappy too.  It's the way it goes, I am marrying into this family for life, so sometimes you have to just suck it up.  Make peace with it, because in the end it won't really matter on your big day.

    As far as time... Ive already been engaged for 13 months, and I started looking into everything like that weekend lol so the date will get here so fast for you!

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  • You are sooo right I find myself saying or typing lol MY WEDDING ..It is OUR WEDDING I just have to take a step Back and breathe.I know they have the best intentions for the BOTH of us.I love him and her both.And you're right June 2013 is quickly approaching its already about to be April!It feels great to hear from a fellow bride to be who understands :Thanks for the advice!
  • Exactly!. .. You can't please everyone!!So I am learning now more than ever!!It is definitely a challenge planning a Wedding and bringing two families wants together !But as you said on the Big Day it won't matter:!
  • Definitely take some time to read posts on this board and others, it'll help calm you down and put things into perspective. And as for trying to settle on a date, that is something that is 100% up to you and your FI. It is impossible to please EVERYONE...so just take their schedules into consideration and see what feels best for you both. Keep in mind though that it is not just your day, your fiance will want to have a say in things. 

    Also, once you find your venue(s) it'll be easier to pick a date. Some places will already be booked but if you love the location, don't tie yourself down to one specific date. (We originally wanted a Saturday wedding, but ended up changing it to a Friday evening wedding due to the venue being booked already.)

    Welcome to the board though and congrats on your engagement! 




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  • First off, welcome to the board and congrats on your engagement. I have been engaged for 8 months and I remember thinking like you that it would never get here and seemed so far away. I am here to tell you that time is absolutely flying. I seriously cant even believe it. FI and I were originally thinking of having a fall 2012 wedding which would have given me exactly a year to plan, I would be freaking out right now and am so happy I decided to have a June wedding.

    The PP's have given great advice. The only thing I wanted to add was whats the difference between the beginning of June and the end but a couple of weeks? That seems like a small price to pay to me to keep the peace. The important thing is that you are marrying your man! But do tell his family, the wedding will be at the end of June. Instead of setting an exact date, I would choose a time frame or a couple of weeks. Do you want a Saturday wedding? If so I would choose the 22nd or 29th.  Do not set a date in stone until you book your venue, they might not have your date available so its good to be flexible! Keep us updated!
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  • Thank You everyone!!I feel soooo much better talking with Brides to be who can understand this situation:I don't feel Alone in this now:But to update you Ladies we've changed the Date AGAIN ..To April 2013 now.which I love...it's supposed to hopefully not change this time my Fianc and I decided on it Alone with no Family's Words.I Hope This is the last date change..But I cannot still say for sure it isn't..But at least I'm marrying My Best friend:
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