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Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions
Noey88
member
Feet Washing Ceremony
I have never liked unity candles or sand ceremonies. So instead we talked about doing a feet washing ceremony. Its a very spiritual and intimate thing to do. Any ideas on how to make it not boring for those who dont know what it is? Should we explain it?
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Re: Feet Washing Ceremony
[QUOTE]I think most people are aware of the significance. However, I would urge you to reconsider because logistically it's a mess. You'll have to have chairs to sit in, and there's a huge chance you'll spill/splash water everywhere. You'll have to remove shoes and socks or stockings and then immediately put them back on damp feet (ick!). And some people are just generally grossed out by feet anyway and will be uncomfortable. If you do this (and I still don't think you should), make sure you have some music playing so it's not awkward silence. But really, you don't need any sort of 'unity' ceremony because you're already performing the ultimate one by getting married. FWIW, we took communion together in our ceremony, just the two of us, with soft music playing. It took maybe 30 seconds.
Posted by artbyallie[/QUOTE]
Ditto all of this. I am one of those people that find feet incredibly repulsive. I don't know that I could watch this. I would probably end up kicking the chair of the person in front of me because my relex to even the thought of having my feet touched is to kick wildly.
[QUOTE]I would also advise against this. The practicalities of it are just too complex. And I've never understood why people feel the need to have extra "unity ceremonies" within the marriage ceremony, because that is of course itself a unity ceremony (as artbyallie said).
Posted by tiny speck[/QUOTE]
<div>Logistically it will be difficult, but I don't see this as a "unity" thing. In the Christian faith this is a show of humility and being willing to serve others.</div>
The symbolism doesn't work for me either.
Fatty Blog
[QUOTE]I'm not wild about the symbolism. Seems degrading to me.
Posted by NOLAbridealmost[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I find that interesting. Can you explain why you think that? (This is not an attack, I really am curious.)</div><div>
</div><div>I've seen it done several times (and participated once) and while it is supposed to be a humbling experience I don't think it is degrading. When a couple (romantic or otherwise) do it to each other it is an act of service. It is not meant to imply that the person doing the washing is 'less" of anything.</div><div>
</div><div><a href="http://www.gci.org/church/lordssup/footwash" rel="nofollow">http://www.gci.org/church/lordssup/footwash</a>
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June 1, 2013 - finally making it official!
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[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Feet Washing Ceremony : Logistically it will be difficult, but I don't see this as a "unity" thing. In the Christian faith <strong>this is a show of humility and being willing to serve others.</strong>
Posted by AprilH81[/QUOTE]
Weddings are about forming a partnership between two people-a partnership that should be one of equals. This suggests that one is subservient to the other, and in this day and age that kind of symbolism may not go over well.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Feet Washing Ceremony : Weddings are about forming a partnership between two people-a partnership that should be one of equals. This suggests that one is subservient to the other, and in this day and age that kind of symbolism may not go over well.
Posted by Jen4948[/QUOTE]
<div>Yes... husband and wife are equal. But they both must serve each other. Love that isn't selfless isn't really love at all. For Christians, it's not about being lesser. Jesus, who is God himself incarnate, the supreme master of the universe, washed all the apostles' feet. Was that because Jesus was somehow lesser? Subservient? No, his point was that true love means service. Same for husband and wife.</div>
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[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Feet Washing Ceremony : Weddings are about forming a partnership between two people-a partnership that should be one of equals. This suggests that one is subservient to the other, and in this day and age that kind of symbolism may not go over well.
Posted by Jen4948[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Generally speaking the parties involved take turns washing the other's feet. During a wedding ceremony the bride would wash the groom then the groom would wash the bride... Nothing subservient about that in my eyes.
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[QUOTE]I went to two weddings that did this and it takes FOREVER. It is SO uncomfortable to watch. I am not a fan. I would do it privately if it means that much to you. <strong> I also find it a bit pretentious. </strong>Just my opinion.
Posted by soontobehanby[/QUOTE]
<div>Why (to the bolded part)?</div>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Feet Washing Ceremony : Why (to the bolded part)?
Posted by lplions[/QUOTE]
<div>I think it might just be the couple I saw do it. When I said we were doing the unity sand, they were like, well we are washing feet because it's <em>biblical. </em>All snooty, like they are better christians because they washed feet instead of dumping sand in a jar. </div>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Feet Washing Ceremony : I think it might just be the couple I saw do it. When I said we were doing the unity sand, they were like, well we are washing feet because it's biblical. All snooty, like they are better christians because they washed feet instead of dumping sand in a jar.
Posted by soontobehanby[/QUOTE]
<div>Ah, okay. Yea, I can see how that would mar your view of it. I would feel the same way, honestly. We're not dumping sand in a jar or lighting a candle because we don't want to keep it. That's the only reason. (I'm one of those people that feels obligated to keep things of sentimental value.... and I don't want to worry about it spilling or breaking in one of the moves.)</div>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Feet Washing Ceremony : You do know that they BOTH wash EACH OTHER'S feet, right? So, the symbolism would be that they will both be subservient to each other, each one putting spouse above themselves. How is that offensive?
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]
Actually, no, I didn't. And please don't shout at me.
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But with all ceremony ideas the calculus for me cones down to deciding whether you are doing something because you believe it us essential to your feeling married or because it seems fun/ looks good in pictures/ you want to be super special and unique. If it's really essential to you, you do it. If it isn't, skip it.
(hee hee)
My grandfather was part of a Thee Baptist in the south, and they practiced it.