help me plz!!

vtotten1222

ok so hears my problem.....

i just got engaged (whoop whoop) and my FI told my dad that he can be the one to walk me down the aisl.

well my mom married my dads brother who is my step dad and my uncle has been there for me as a father (my dad has been there too)  my mom wants me to show respect to my uncle and have him and my dad "give me away" but my dad will not let that happen, how can i make both of tehm happy and not have it mess up[ my big day??

vtotten1222

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_help-me-plz?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:38cddf4a-cdeb-41b1-abc7-177fe5b7ef8aPost:c226e293-0162-4dff-b9ce-96504718ff6d">Re: help me plz!!</a>:
[QUOTE]1. Tell your FI not to make decisions for you and them inform other people about them. 2. Walk down the aisle alone or with your mom to avoid family drama.
Posted by Liatris2010[/QUOTE]

it was the term for my dad to give us blessings... and i understand my mom moved me out of state so my dad missed out on a lot i have no problem that my FI told my dad this i just dont want my mom getting all pissy with it my mom and dad dont get along well...

AddieCake

I'm so confused. Your fiance decided who would walk you down the aisle?  Your dad wouldn't approve your marriage unless he gets to walk you down the aisle? Do you NEED your father's permission to marry the person you love? I agree with Scribe you should not be ok with your fiance taking it upon himself to make that call. 

MrsGandthebeag

Your mom married your uncle?  I would not even worry about who is walking you where until you're close to getting married.

KatWAG

I really hope this is MUD

QueerFemme

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_help-me-plz?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:38cddf4a-cdeb-41b1-abc7-177fe5b7ef8aPost:c2d8dcab-c72a-41f2-96d2-241c0002bae3">Re: help me plz!!</a>:
[QUOTE]I really hope this is MUD
Posted by KatWAG[/QUOTE]

me tooooooo

kaos16

In exchange for being able to marry you, your Fiance had to promise your dad he'd be able to walk you down the aisle?  Is that accurate?  Were goats and chickens also exchanged.

Based on this post, as well as your other about the "color" camoflauge, I wonder if maybe you should take some time to think about what you really want and what is important to you.  If people are bartering over you already, one of whom is your soon to be husband, I wouldn't think that some premarital counseling would hurt.

Also, and I dread asking this, but how old are you?

Viczaesar

It would be way easier to understand your posts if they had proper punctuation and spelling, OP.

Jen4948

It should be strictly up to you, not your FI and not your dad, who walks you down the aisle.

Also, please do some spelling and grammar checking with your post.  I had trouble understanding it.

Pookieson

Your mom married your uncle and your dad bribed your FI for approval to walk you down the aisle.  So....walk with who you want.  Tell FI not to make decisions that include you without you.
Also, I hope this is MUD too. 

winelover123

How old are you, OP? I'm curious.

Only you get to decide who walks you down the aisle. Quite frankly, I'd be pissed at FI if he decided for me or bribed my dad into giving us his blessing.

monkeysip

In normal situations, we always suggest that you split your walk.... half with dad, then the other half with step dad.

But I agree with pps that this is cray cray.  Asking for hand in marriage is a nice symbol of wanting the father's wisdom and guidance, but it shouldn't be a actual permission for which your fiance has to make bargains.  That's weird.

Also, I'm always a big fan of the B&G walking together.  I like that symbolism the most... but alas, I knew it would break my dad's heart to do that, and he wouldn't understand.

vtotten1222

idk what MUD is and i really dont care

i was asking for some ideals to make every one happy..

not for you people to judge me and my family

i love my FI and he is good to me and my daughter
i have no problem of him telling my dad that is fine cuz he is my dad and i do want him to walk me down the aile

i dont matter how old i am cuz im old enuff and if you dont like it dont post simple as that

oh and thank to every one here for not helping and judging its people like you how push people over the edge.

s-aries8990

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_help-me-plz?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:38cddf4a-cdeb-41b1-abc7-177fe5b7ef8aPost:606e9d2a-2b70-47b1-9adc-9dddd88c01e1">Re: help me plz!!</a>:
[QUOTE]
idk what MUD is and i really dont care

i was asking for some ideals to make every one happy.. not for you people to judge me and my family

i love my FI and he is good to me and my daughter

i have no problem of him telling my dad that is fine cuz he is my dad and i do want him to walk me down the aile

i dont matter how old i am cuz im old enuff and if you dont like it dont post simple as that

oh and thank to every one here for not helping and judging

 its people like you how push people over the edge.
Posted by vtotten1222[/QUOTE].

First: Punctuation is your friend! :)

OK now:
1)MUD- Made up Drama. Some people start fake accounts and make up crazy stuff to get a rise out of people.

2) This is a public forum and strangers will respond however they want. Everyone was so caugh up on the archane view you initially presented of your FI bargaining for your hand in marriage only if you father can walk you down the aisle as opposed to your Stepdad. What will make YOU happy during that 50 feet or so is what is really most important.

3)Good! It's great to hear about a man treakting a woman and her children properly

4)If you want your dad to walk you down, have him walk you down. What's the big deal?If someone isn't happy (mom), it's their problem. Is mom helping to pay for the wedding? If so, you may want to walk half and half.

 Its just that YOU should have asked him to escort you, not FI LETTING him do it - it makes you seem like FI's posession rather than your own independent person.

5) Your age was asked for several reasons: your poor grammar (not meant as an insult, just a clear observation), your responses, and the situation. It makes you seem like a child/subordinate rather than a strong, independent woman.

6) If you want smoke blown up your butt, this is not the place for it. No one was rude, they were just blunt and truly wondering WTH this whole situation was. AND some people did give you advice.


In all honesty, do you have Microsoft word on your computer? Try typing into there, it will help posters to understand you better, as your current way of posting is really confusing because you don't use any punctuation or capital letters at the beginning of a sentence. Sure we all have our typos, but the post I quoted is LITERALLY one run-on sentence.

Viczaesar

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_help-me-plz?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:38cddf4a-cdeb-41b1-abc7-177fe5b7ef8aPost:606e9d2a-2b70-47b1-9adc-9dddd88c01e1">Re: help me plz!!</a>:
[QUOTE]idk what MUD is and i really dont care i was asking for some ideals to make every one happy.. not for you people to judge me and my family i love my FI and he is good to me and my daughter i have no problem of him telling my dad that is fine cuz he is my dad and i do want him to walk me down the aile i dont matter how old i am cuz im old enuff and if you dont like it dont post simple as that oh and thank to every one here for not helping and judging its people like you how push people over the edge.
Posted by vtotten1222[/QUOTE]
You should go back to school.  You have obviously not mastered remedial English.