Ceremony and Vow Ideas

Lets just get to the cake...

So my fiance and I have been together for abour 5 years now and we finally are actually starting to plan the silly thing.  The pair of us are both pretty down-to-earth folks and we've gone as a couple to more than a dozen weddings over the years and we have come to a pretty good agreement on one thing.

Wedding ceremonies are boring.

It doesn't matter how pretty the bride is or how awesome the themed wedding was pulled off the actual ceremony is only interesting to the immediately family (and even though I bet half the glassy-eyed men are really just counting the seconds until the reception dinner)

So my fiance and I have decided to go a pretty non-traditional route.

We're going to "elope" to Las Vegas.  Is it still eloping if you plan it a year in advance?

We're planning on flying out for our next year's anniversary and get married by Elvis.  As we leave town we are going to drop into the mailbox a ton of post cards to our close friends and family announcing that by the time they read that letter we'll be hitched--and give them a date/time for the wedding celebration.

When we return from our 2-week Las Vegas wedding/honeymoon I want to have a wedding reception--an after-the-fact party to celebrate our union and boast our new marital status.  Plus--the reception is always the part of weddings I really enjoy.

Re: Lets just get to the cake...

  • LiLe422LiLe422
    500 Comments 100 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    member
    edited March 2013
    In Response to Lets just get to the cake...:
    So my fiance and I have been together for abour 5 years now and we finally are actually starting to  plan  the silly thing.  The pair of us are both pretty down-to-earth folks and we've gone as a couple to more than a dozen weddings over the years and we have come to a pretty good agreement on one thing. Wedding ceremonies are boring . It doesn't matter how pretty the bride is or how awesome the themed wedding was pulled off the actual ceremony is only interesting to the immediately family (and even though I bet half the glassy-eyed men are really just counting the seconds until the reception dinner) So my fiance and I have decided to go a pretty non-traditional route. We're going to "elope" to Las Vegas.  Is it still eloping if you plan it a year in advance? We're planning on flying out for our next year's anniversary and get married by Elvis.  As we leave town we are going to drop into the mailbox a ton of post cards to our close friends and family announcing that by the time they read that letter we'll be hitched--and give them a date/time for the wedding celebration. When we return from our 2-week Las Vegas wedding/honeymoon I want to have a wedding reception--an after-the-fact party to celebrate our union and boast our new marital status.  Plus--the reception is always the part of weddings I really enjoy.
    Posted by darkiya
    I would say no.  Eloping is spur of the moment.  What you are planning is a private ceremony. 
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  • Is there a question in here somewhere?
  • Be prepared for you family to be heartbroken. Just because you don't like ceremonies, doesn't mean they don't. A JOP service can be done in less than 10 minutes.

  • I always thought an elopement simply meant that you got married just the two of you.  I thought a private ceremony was when only immediate family was present.  

    Anyway, it doesn't really matter what you call it.  There is nothing wrong with getting married just the two of you.  If you wish to throw a party later, call it a celebration of marriage and do not include any WR activities.  There is nothing wrong with your current plan, although not everyone will agree with it.

    I personally don't think ceremonies are boring and I've been to ones as short as 10 minutes, so if that is your only concern, you may want to consider this as an option. 

    May 2013 February Siggy: Invitations

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  • Just have a quick ceremony in front of your family, have the reception that you want, and go on honeymoon to vegas.

    If you want it to be exciting have your JP dress up like Kermit or David Bowie. No one will be bored.

    image   imageimage
    You'll never be subject to a cash bar, gap, potluck wedding, or b-list if you marry a Muppet Overlord.

  • Muppet you crack me up!  I would love to have Kermit as my officiant!

    I can guarantee you that a lot of "down-to-earth" people don't find wedding ceremonies boring.  No matter who it is, I LOVE the ceremony.  It's very special, even if it's brief.  I am personally bored by the reception.  They take too long, I don't drink in public, and hate today's music.  So, they're not my favorite part of the wedding.  To each their own.

    Run your plans by your immediate families.  I agree, mine would be SO hurt if they weren't there.  I wouldn't necessarily call it eloping though.  To me, the term "elope" indicates a certain sneaky-ness.  If you're telling everyone in advance what you're doing, I'd suggest calling it a "private ceremony". 

    Congrats on starting the planning!  I have some friends that were engaged for nearly 4 years before thinking of any plans, and they're excited now that they've started to! Good luck!
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    member
    What you're planning isn't an elopement.  As PPs say, the word "elopement" indicates a clandestine, spur-of-the-moment event as opposed to a planned private weddding.  That's what I would call it.
  • as long as you realize you can elope, but then your "after party" is not a reception since a reception is to receive your guests who went to your wedding.  (Your wedding is the ceremony FYI).  and an elopement means no pre wedding parties too.
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  • Totally agree with this:

    Be prepared for you family to be heartbroken. Just because you don't like ceremonies, doesn't mean they don't. A JOP service can be done in less than 10 minutes.

    And be prepared for very few people to come to your afterparty.  Most folks who are NOT close enough to be included in your ceremony feel that they must not be close enough to bring a big gift to you at your designated place and time after the event.

    A friend of mine's daughter did this.  And the bride's parents planned a huge afterparty, which was a free dinner/dance cruise - very popular down here.  They invited 200 people, and about 30 people came - mostly people who were IN the wedding party and parents.  They were pretty disappointed with this, but it was nothing more than a gift collection event.
  • I'm confused as to why 15 minutes of your life not being some kind of Vegas jazz show is so heinous?  Weddings aren't supposed to be for entertainment; that's why they lack strippers, spotlights, stagehands, elephants, jugglers with knives, etc.

    If it's important to your family, standing in one place for 10 to 15 minutes and not being entertained out of your mind isn't going to kill you.  If you feel it will, just go to Vegas and be done with it, don't rub salt in the wounds by inviting them to the half of the event that doesn't even really matter to them.
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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  • In Response to Re: Lets just get to the cake...:
    Is there a question in here somewhere?
    Posted by MrsGandthebeag
    I was thinking the same thing... 
    "Anyone can wear a white gown, but only a bride can wear a veil". ~Randy Fenoli Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Just throwing in that I personally love wedding ceremonies. I was really bummed when FI's cousin had a AHR and we couldn't make it to the actual wedding :(
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  • I'm really in the same boat.  Well, minus Elvis.

    I'd like to do it on May 1st because that day is significant to me, so if we don't do it this year (which I assume we won't), it'd have to a full year from now.  Would we tell people ahead of time that we're doing it? I have no idea.  Heck, I could even see just changing our facebook statuses and seeing if anyone notices :)

    For me, the reason why you have a wedding in the first place is for the couple, not for any family or friends that might be disappointed.  

    Just wanted to let you know that you're not alone in this.  In the minority, apparently, but not alone.  (So why am I even on the Knot?  To find other people like yourself because anyone that hears these thoughts calls me insane)


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