Wedding Cakes & Food Forum

Beer and Wine Only

Hi!  This was mentioned on a different thread and it made me curious for some opinions.

My fiance doesn't drink (never has) and I really only drink a little wine and will have an occasional beer. We have no interest in liquor and have no desire for our guests to get super drunk at our wedding - Yes, I know that people can get super drunk on beer and wine but I think it cuts down a little bit and I really don't want people doing shots.

It's not so much a budget thing (my mother would actually prefer the full open bar and my parents are paying), but we just don't really want it. I have been to weddings before that were beer and wine only and none of the guests cared, but I am wondering if that was because they were generally laid back Wisconsin-ites

Long story short - Is there anything I should worry about ettiquette-wise with this arrangement?

Re: Beer and Wine Only

  • Well since your parents are paying they have final say.

    Honestly, I can get just as drunk in the same amount of time off wine as I could liquor so that really is a moot point.

    As for not wanting people to do shots, some venues actually will not allow this.  But if your vendor does you can speak with the bartenders and tell them not to serve shots.

    I really think your reason for not wanting a full open bar is kind of dumb.  Since you know that people can get drunk off beer and wine the same way as they could liquor then I don't really see the point of restricting it since it isn't a price thing.  People are adults and they know how to control themselves.  If they do get out of control that is on them not you.

    But there is nothing wrong with just serving beer and wine as opposed to a full open bar etiquette wise.

  • It's ok to serve beer and wine only.  However, your guests may be disappointed, and they may complain.  If it's not a budget issue, I don't see why you wouldn't have a full open bar.  As Maggie suggested, talk to your venue about not allowing shots if you are really worried about people doing shots all night.  
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_food-cakes_beer-and-wine-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:23Discussion:52dd19c5-ede6-489c-9aab-cce62f674830Post:2885d692-1a7e-4506-b684-fb75b66f28f1">Re: Beer and Wine Only</a>:
    [QUOTE]Well since your parents are paying they have final say. Honestly, I can get just as drunk in the same amount of time off wine as I could liquor so that really is a moot point. As for not wanting people to do shots, some venues actually will not allow this.  But if your vendor does you can speak with the bartenders and tell them not to serve shots. I really think your reason for not wanting a full open bar is kind of dumb.  Since you know that people can get drunk off beer and wine the same way as they could liquor then I don't really see the point of restricting it since it isn't a price thing.  People are adults and they know how to control themselves.  If they do get out of control that is on them not you. But there is nothing wrong with just serving beer and wine as opposed to a full open bar etiquette wise.
    Posted by Maggie0829[/QUOTE]

    <div>All of this.  I'd have the open bar.  If anything, don't have shots.  I'd much prefer a fruity cocktail over beer or wine.</div>
  • There is nothing you need to worry about, etiquette-wise by serving beer and wine only. Do whatever you, FH, and parents want to do, except a cash bar.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_food-cakes_beer-and-wine-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:23Discussion:52dd19c5-ede6-489c-9aab-cce62f674830Post:2885d692-1a7e-4506-b684-fb75b66f28f1">Re: Beer and Wine Only</a>:
    [QUOTE]Well since your parents are paying they have final say. Honestly, I can get just as drunk in the same amount of time off wine as I could liquor so that really is a moot point. As for not wanting people to do shots, some venues actually will not allow this.  But if your vendor does you can speak with the bartenders and tell them not to serve shots. I really think your reason for not wanting a full open bar is kind of dumb.  Since you know that people can get drunk off beer and wine the same way as they could liquor then I don't really see the point of restricting it since it isn't a price thing.  People are adults and they know how to control themselves.  If they do get out of control that is on them not you. But there is nothing wrong with just serving beer and wine as opposed to a full open bar etiquette wise.
    Posted by Maggie0829[/QUOTE]

    <div>This.</div><div>
    </div>






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • I would love to have beer and wine only. The venue we have allows us to bring our own liquor, however we are on a tight budget and will be doing the bare minimum. Liquor is expensive, not to mention all the mixers to get with them, and there's always the chance of getting drunk. Whoever posted first was wrong... it's not the parent's choice, it's YOUR wedding, YOUR choice. Tell them thanks but no thanks.

    PS the other reason why I'm only having beer and wine? My dad's family is composed of mostly alcoholics. Remove the temptation of vodka and rum and whisky and there will be less problems. Having a bouncer will also help, my military cousin is mine =)
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_food-cakes_beer-and-wine-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:23Discussion:52dd19c5-ede6-489c-9aab-cce62f674830Post:50c97861-2143-40fa-b242-99dd77d77cc0">Re: Beer and Wine Only</a>:
    [QUOTE]I would love to have beer and wine only. The venue we have allows us to bring our own liquor, however we are on a tight budget and will be doing the bare minimum. Liquor is expensive, not to mention all the mixers to get with them, and there's always the chance of getting drunk. Whoever posted first was wrong... <strong>it's not the parent's choice, it's YOUR wedding, YOUR choice.</strong> Tell them thanks but no thanks. PS the other reason why I'm only having beer and wine? My dad's family is composed of mostly alcoholics. Remove the temptation of vodka and rum and whisky and there will be less problems. Having a bouncer will also help, my military cousin is mine =)
    Posted by piercek613[/QUOTE]

    I'm sorry but you are wrong.  Whoever is paying for the reception has final say in what is and what is not included.  If the parents are paying for the reception and they want a full open bar then guess what, they can have a full open bar.

    Also, removing liquor from your event will not remove the temptation to drink for alcoholics.  Beer and wine work just as well to get drunk off of as would liquor.

  • You could always add a couple signature drinks. We are doing beer, wine and strawberry daquiri's. Possibly a screwdriver with vodka and OJ. As others have posted if money isn't an issue I would allow your guests to have an open bar. If we could afford it we would do a full open bar

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