Throwing a pre-wedding girls night (not in the wedding party)

lovebug5140

My best friend is getting married in a couple months. Her wedding party consists of only her sister as her MOH. Her sister isn't interested in planning any pre-wedding festivities due to issues going on in her own life.

I've talked to my friend and she's fine not having a shower, but I asked if she wanted to get all her girlfriends together for dinner (around 10 people) since a few are coming from out of the area to visit. She does, and we agreed the Thursday before the wedding would work well.

So my question is, what do I call this event? Neither of us view it as a "bachelorette party", we're not planning on bar hopping or playing games.
And how do I make it known that everyone is paying for themselves, or am I obligated to pay since I'm sending out the invitations?

Signed,
Lost but with good intentions

itzMS

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_throwing-a-pre-wedding-girls-night-not-in-the-wedding-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:32Discussion:8ece566d-96bb-4af4-aa23-1b3150501099Post:086ee6ad-ae0f-4de4-9114-33d45c53b060">Throwing a pre-wedding girls night (not in the wedding party)</a>:
[QUOTE]My best friend is getting married in a couple months. Her wedding party consists of only her sister as her MOH. Her sister isn't interested in planning any pre-wedding festivities due to issues going on in her own life. I've talked to my friend and she's fine not having a shower, but I asked if she wanted to get all her girlfriends together for dinner (around 10 people) since a few are coming from out of the area to visit. She does, and we agreed the Thursday before the wedding would work well. So my question is, what do I call this event? Neither of us view it as a "bachelorette party", we're not planning on bar hopping or playing games. And how do I make it known that everyone is paying for themselves, or am I obligated to pay since I'm sending out the invitations? Signed, Lost but with good intentions :)
Posted by lovebug5140[/QUOTE]

I think it might be best if you just call everyone.

Sending out an invitation can imply that you're hosting. Writing "Bring cash for dinner" (or whatever) on an invitation doesn't work well! <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-wink.gif" border="0" alt="Wink" title="Wink" />

"Hi Jane, this is lovebug5140, Katie's friend. I was thinking it would be great to have some ladies meet up at XYZ Restaurant on Thursday night at 7:00 for some dinner and drinks to wish Katie well. Do you think you'd be able to stop by? I am going to make reservations."

erinlin25

It can still be called a bachelorette party.  It does not have to be hosted by someone in the bridal party, so get a list of friends from the bride and organize a fun dinner in her honor.  You do not need to bar hop/play games either.  Dinner only is just fine.  Get a dinner budget from the girls invited, see who can go and see if everyone can throw in an extra $3-$5 to cover the bride.  I'm sure the bride would appreciate it!