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Moms and Maids
beautiflaw
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Toddler Flower Girl? What To Expect?
So my sister in law just got engaged (Yay! I love her and her fiance is great.) and she asked if my daughter could be in her wedding as a flower girl. I told her yes, but then later it occured to me that my daughter will be 2 at the time of the wedding! Is this too young to really do flower girl things? My flower girl was 6 and she did okay, she scattered the petals and walked down by herself just fine, but on the way back out she picked the petals back up! lol! It was sweet and hat was fine, but then during pictures she and the ring bearer didn't want to be still so we barely got any pictures of us all together.
I am afraid that maybe DD won't want to scatter the petals or be in a bad mood or not want to walk down the aisle. Would it be better if me or DH or another bridesmaid led her down the aisle to help her? What can I do to help make picture time a bit easier? Should I help her practice with some petals and a basket leading up to the wedding?
I am afraid that maybe DD won't want to scatter the petals or be in a bad mood or not want to walk down the aisle. Would it be better if me or DH or another bridesmaid led her down the aisle to help her? What can I do to help make picture time a bit easier? Should I help her practice with some petals and a basket leading up to the wedding?
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Re: Toddler Flower Girl? What To Expect?
As for pictures, she really won't be in that many. Or at least try to not have her be in many. See if your sister would try and get the pictures with your daughter over with first so that she doesn't get bored or distracted.
I'm in the camp that if a child is too young to verbally explain back to you what their role is, what they have to do, and a general sense of why it's important, they're too young to be a wedding. Most toddlers are not capable of doing this- you're not going to be able to get a two-year old to scatter flowers; you'll be lucky if you can get a two year old to walk down the aisle without throwing a tantrum. (Have you ever seen, for instance, a preschool-age ballet recital? Even with a dance they've been practicing for weeks or months, at least one kid usually wanders away, and a bunch are off in their own little worlds- and that's kids a developmental step up from toddlers!)
So with that, if the bride still wants a toddler flower girl, I pretty much think you just have to make sure she understands what a toddler is developmentally capable of. She probably won't be able to understand that she's supposed to throw flowers- pomander balls are a much better idea. (Or, one of my friends had a two-year old flower girl, and she just had her carry a basket with a big hydrangea in it- but no throwing anything.) And you should either have an older ring bearer that she knows and can hold her hand, or you or her father should plan to hold her hand or even carry her down the aisle. And the bride should be aware that a tantrum at the last minute could derail walking down tha aisle at all- being in the spotlight can trigger crying jags even for kids who are usually low-key.
May 2013 February Siggy: Invitations
[QUOTE]I think 2 years old is adorable. Flower girls have nothing they particularly need to do besides look cute- she'll do that just fine. She may need you to coax her down the aisle. I think the proper age for a flower girl is from walking age to the age when people stop saying "awww" when they see the kid walking down the aisle. She probably won't throw any flowers, but who cares? People just want to see a cute kid.
Posted by melb2013[/QUOTE]
<div>I don't usually chime in on here, but I have to agree with this. My niece is our FG and she's only going to be 15mos. She's going to wear a pretty princess dress, have a pomander of silk flowers on her wrist and (maybe) walk down the aisle escorted by my BIL. If she doesn't do it, no biggie. For me it was really more that I have one niece and everyone (me, my sister, my mom) all wanted her to be FG. If it's in name only, that's fine. </div>
[QUOTE]This is what I would be prepared for: <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BvOIHmHHfIQ" rel="nofollow">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BvOIHmHHfIQ</a> .
Posted by AndreaJulia[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Very cute.
<div>It looks like the family was prepared for surprises. The children were seated with adults after the dramatic entrance of the first flower girl. </div></div>
A word of warning though, when (if) you do decide to speak to the bride make it clear why you feel the way you do. When I first got engaged my sister told me my nephew would be available as a ring bearer, but later told my mom she didn't want him in my wedding because he doesn't take direction well. I was really hurt by that because he's in a wedding the day before me, but I understand there may be other reasons that she didn't feel like sharing.
Either way - if a bride wants the most perfect wedding she won't put a two year old in it. It's okay for mishaps, they're even cute.
My FG will be 18 months; my RB just turned 3. These kids mean the world to me and there is no others I would rather have (there would be other kids I "could" ask, but wouldn't since these two are the most important to me). My FG is so excited and asks her mom every day when she gets to wear her pretty dress. Her mom is my best friend and will be walking right before me, so if need be she can bring FG with her if she gets scared, or we plan on having her daddy at the end of the aisle (its really short) to help as well. Whether she goes down the aisle or not, she will be adorable and I get married either way. We also do not expect her to stand with the wedding party but will sit with her dad or grandma during the ceremony.
With that said, my expectations are LOW. Both their moms are BMs and they can walk down the aisle with their Mom or not at all if its not going to work in the moment.
The mom's and I are making their dresses for about $20 each and I think they are just as thrilled to have them there as I am. So I will hope for the best and prepare for the worst!