Money Dance/Dollar Dance

desireelaguna

Everyont keeps telling me to have one? when is a good time to do it ?

ZiggyZos

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_money-dancedollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:58282136-31fa-45c2-ae3a-19821eab2ebaPost:ec59e9d0-53c6-410d-ae14-dff20420c049">Money Dance/Dollar Dance</a>:
[QUOTE]Everyont keeps telling me to have one? when is a good time to do it ?
Posted by desireelaguna[/QUOTE]

Never. Dollar dances are rude.

Guests should not be expected to open their wallets at any time during your wedding. It can be uncomfortable for guests who feel pressured to participate and boring for other guests to watch.

DaisyMaeMommy

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_money-dancedollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:58282136-31fa-45c2-ae3a-19821eab2ebaPost:ec59e9d0-53c6-410d-ae14-dff20420c049">Money Dance/Dollar Dance</a>:
[QUOTE]Everyont keeps telling me to have one? when is a good time to do it ?
Posted by desireelaguna[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>Definitely wouldn't mention these around here. They are generally frowned upon.</div><div>
</div><div>Who is asking you to do one?</div>

QueerFemme

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_money-dancedollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:58282136-31fa-45c2-ae3a-19821eab2ebaPost:ec59e9d0-53c6-410d-ae14-dff20420c049">Money Dance/Dollar Dance</a>:
[QUOTE]Everyont keeps telling me to have one? when is a good time to do it ?
Posted by desireelaguna[/QUOTE]

Whoever keeps telling you to do one, tell them "we decided not to have one. But, thanks for the suggestion".

I do feel your pain. My partner's family and a LOT of our friends were trying to convince us to have one.  But, they are tacky, and incredibly rude.  They are painful to sit through, especially when they drag on and on for many songs.  And no guest should ever be asked to open their wallet at your wedding. 

Skip it, and tell people you aren't having one.  The end.

JoanE2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_money-dancedollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:58282136-31fa-45c2-ae3a-19821eab2ebaPost:ec59e9d0-53c6-410d-ae14-dff20420c049">Money Dance/Dollar Dance</a>:
[QUOTE]Everyont keeps telling me to have one? <strong>when is a good time to do it </strong>?
Posted by desireelaguna[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Never!

</div>

[Deleted User]

It's never a good time to empty your guests' wallets. The reception is a thank-you for your guests witnessing your ceremony, not to guilt them into taking their money. Tell the person who suggested this to you, "Thanks but we're not interested in tacky, rude and outdated traditions."

Maggie0829

Just don't.  Anything that involves your guests opening up their wallets is rude.  This include money dances, wishing wells, money trees, honeymoon fund jars on the bar, the cake smashing game, cash bars, etc, etc.

MissMolly

I wouldn't have one. I do hear you on that though; my FMIL has brought it up a couple times, but I feel uncomfortable with the idea, so we aren't having one.

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_money-dancedollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:58282136-31fa-45c2-ae3a-19821eab2ebaPost:ec59e9d0-53c6-410d-ae14-dff20420c049">Money Dance/Dollar Dance</a>:
[QUOTE]Everyont keeps telling me to have one? when is a good time to do it ?
Posted by desireelaguna[/QUOTE]

Jen4948

It's never a good idea.

To those who keep bringing it up, tell them, "We considered it and decided not to do it.  Our decision is final, so we'd appreciate not hearing about it any more."

ginter27

I don't know about all you but I'm having one. It's a fun wedding tradition that i grew up watching and can't wait to do it at my own wedding. I'm also having a cash bar. I don't have the money to cover everything for my guests. I don't want to spend my marriage paying for my wedding. Shoot me!

renegade gaucho

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_money-dancedollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:58282136-31fa-45c2-ae3a-19821eab2ebaPost:8afb9185-b550-4c5c-b450-75d72c29840f">Re: Money Dance/Dollar Dance</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't know about all you but I'm having one. It's a fun wedding tradition that i grew up watching and can't wait to do it at my own wedding. I'm also having a cash bar. I don't have the money to cover everything for my guests. I don't want to spend my marriage paying for my wedding. Shoot me!
Posted by ginter27[/QUOTE]

You could always downsize your guest list, look for a more affordable venue, or postpone the wedding until you've saved up enough to properly host a larger guest list, like other courteous and responsible adults do.

Maggie0829

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_money-dancedollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:58282136-31fa-45c2-ae3a-19821eab2ebaPost:8afb9185-b550-4c5c-b450-75d72c29840f">Re: Money Dance/Dollar Dance</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't know about all you but I'm having one. It's a fun wedding tradition that i grew up watching and can't wait to do it at my own wedding. I'm also having a cash bar. I don't have the money to cover everything for my guests. <strong>I don't want to spend my marriage paying for my wedding.</strong> Shoot me!
Posted by ginter27[/QUOTE]

You shouldn't have to spend years paying for your wedding.  Putting yourself in debt for a one day party is dumb.  But so is making your guests pay for your one day party which is exactly what you are doing by having a cash bar.

If you can't host your guests properly then you either need to postpone your wedding till you save up enough money or downsize your event so that you can afford to host everyone.

A way to downsize would be to have an afternoon wedding with just fingerfoods and dessert.  You don't need a lot of food because if you have your ceremony at 2pm and your reception start at 2:30 or 3pm you are not within a meal time and only have to serve a few apps and sweets to satisfy your guests.  You could also host just beer and wine with maybe a signature drink.  This would be more then appropriate for an afternoon affair.

ginter27

I know there are all these "rules" but let's face it, they're all bullsh*t. There are no rules when it comes to your wedding except the one rule that it should be what you want it to be. If you want spring colors in winter, fine. If you want your bridal party to wear clown costumes, then that's your perogotive. This is your day and no arbitrary fashion/social rules should get in the way of that.

renegade gaucho

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_money-dancedollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:58282136-31fa-45c2-ae3a-19821eab2ebaPost:533617d7-50e2-4533-8617-2af321d8f2aa">Re: Money Dance/Dollar Dance</a>:
[QUOTE]I know there are all these "rules" but let's face it, they're all bullsh*t. There are no rules when it comes to your wedding except the one rule that it should be what you want it to be. If you want spring colors in winter, fine. If you want your bridal party to wear clown costumes, then that's your perogotive. This is your day and no arbitrary fashion/social rules should get in the way of that.
Posted by ginter27[/QUOTE]

No.  The things you mentioned--colors, bridal party attire-- are somewhat arbitrary and they are very different from how you treat your guests.  The aversion to money grubbing at a wedding is not arbitrary, it is based on the fact that it is rude to expect your guests to finance your choice to live beyond your means.  If it's your day and other people's comfort doesn't matter, don't bother inviting anyone.  Your guests are taking time out of their lives and spending money on clothes and travel, and most of them will probably give you a gift of some sort as well- it's obnoxious to further nickel and dime them for doing you the honor of attending your wedding.

jenjlgsings

It isn't done in my circles, but I know a lot of Polish families do it because of traditions that are hundreds of years old.  If you are doing it because you are Polish, it is typically done after the unveiling.

If you are doing it because of peer pressure or just because it is something "fun", don't do it.

jessi3617

Were not having a dollar dance. But what we are doing is a dance that is open to anyone who wants to dance with us just without the money. We have also been told we could do a dance where myself and fl go up to whoever we'd like to dance wit and ask them to dance with us. But NO money will be involved.

marip123

What is a money dance?