Just Engaged and Proposals

Engagement party on a cruise ship.

Hello all, I am recently engaged and looking into party venues. I am really in love with the Idea of having the party on a NY banquet cruise. There is a certain boat that is absolutely gorgeous and I think it would be a fabulous experience for our guest. I guess I am just wondering If anyone has done or been a part of something like this and if there are any hidden negatives that I may encounter? Thanks :

Re: Engagement party on a cruise ship.

  • thejucheideathejucheidea East Nashville, Tennessee member
    Tenth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    You shouldn't be planning your own engagement party -- that's very rude.

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_engagement-party-on-a-cruise-ship?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:8fe71613-d4b7-4ad9-bc2d-2f8b84a19ea3Post:7201e565-8b43-4b03-9e24-2dd1017cc6ab">Re: Engagement party on a cruise ship.</a>:
    [QUOTE]You shouldn't be planning your own engagement party -- that's very rude.
    Posted by ahstillwell[/QUOTE]

    <div>Ditto.</div>
    my blog - for the love of ein
    'Next time, just fart.' - BriSox81
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  • In Response to Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.:[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Engagement party on a cruise ship.:You shouldn't be planning your own engagement party that's very rude.Posted by ahstillwellDitto. Posted by kmbryant2413[/QUOTE]
    Why is it rude?
  • KeptInStitchesKeptInStitches the Northern Plains member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_engagement-party-on-a-cruise-ship?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:8fe71613-d4b7-4ad9-bc2d-2f8b84a19ea3Post:f268bb8e-ca27-4738-9383-5484e681456d">Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.: Why is it rude?
    Posted by Queen0fHeartz[/QUOTE]

    <div>Engagement parties are usually gift-giving occasions, so it's bad form to host your own - it can make you look greedy.</div>
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_engagement-party-on-a-cruise-ship?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:8fe71613-d4b7-4ad9-bc2d-2f8b84a19ea3Post:f12116fd-3db5-46b9-8a8e-acb00bb396d7">Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship. : Engagement parties are usually gift-giving occasions, so it's bad form to host your own - it <strong>does</strong> make you look greedy.
    Posted by KeptInStitches[/QUOTE]

    <div>FTFY.</div><div>
    </div><div>All pre-wedding parties are supposed to be hosted in your honor - which means that other people throw them for you. That includes:</div><div>
    </div><div>Engagement</div><div>Bridal Shower/Luncheon/Party</div><div>Bachelor</div><div>Bachelorette</div><div>Lingerie</div><div>
    </div><div>If you throw them yourself it is seen as an attention-grabbing and a gift-grabby event, like 'Look at us! We got engaged! Come give us gifts!'</div>
    my blog - for the love of ein
    'Next time, just fart.' - BriSox81
    image
  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    What they said. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
  • I have been to a bunch of host thrown engagement parties over the last few years. So I do not think the people from my circle or my FI's circle will think we are gift grubby.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_engagement-party-on-a-cruise-ship?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:8fe71613-d4b7-4ad9-bc2d-2f8b84a19ea3Post:3c0c4547-e67b-459f-9c35-27245824a367">Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.</a>:
    [QUOTE]I have been to a bunch of host thrown engagement parties over the last few years. So I do not think the people from my circle or my FI's circle will think we are gift grubby.
    Posted by Queen0fHeartz[/QUOTE]

    <div>Then good luck!</div>
    my blog - for the love of ein
    'Next time, just fart.' - BriSox81
    image
  • BTW, thanks for answering my question........oh wait.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_engagement-party-on-a-cruise-ship?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:8fe71613-d4b7-4ad9-bc2d-2f8b84a19ea3Post:e94991fe-ad8d-425a-bffb-cce75fb713ad">Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.</a>:
    [QUOTE]BTW, thanks for answering my question........oh wait.
    Posted by Queen0fHeartz[/QUOTE]

    <div>Believe it or not, being snide is not cute. We don't give people advice on how to go against etiquette, so if you have already decided you're going to do it, no one is going to tell you HOW to do it.</div>
    my blog - for the love of ein
    'Next time, just fart.' - BriSox81
    image
  • In Response to Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.:BTW, thanks for answering my question........oh wait.Posted by Queen0fHeartzBelieve it or not, being snide is not cute. We don't give people advice on how to go against etiquette, so if you have already decided you're going to do it, no one is going to tell you HOW to do it. Posted by kmbryant2413[/QUOTE]
    How am I going against etiquette? My mom is paying for the party, but she is not the best when it comes to planning an event. So I am helping her plan it. You really mean to tell me that an engagement party is supposed to be a surprise?
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_engagement-party-on-a-cruise-ship?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:8fe71613-d4b7-4ad9-bc2d-2f8b84a19ea3Post:6073a312-17b2-44c6-be68-76277a6f86d1">Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.: How am I going against etiquette? My mom is paying for the party, but she is not the best when it comes to planning an event. So I am helping her plan it. You really mean to tell me that an engagement party is supposed to be a surprise?
    Posted by Queen0fHeartz[/QUOTE]

    <div>Thrown by someone else=/=surprise. You can know about your bridal shower, it doesn't mean you're the one throwing it. If your mother is offering to throw it, she would be the host, not you, and in charge of inviting people, etc.</div>
    photo a826c490-726a-4824-af5c-d938878de228_zpseb85bb5a.jpg
  • In Response to Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.:In Response to Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.: How am I going against etiquette? My mom is paying for the party, but she is not the best when it comes to planning an event. So I am helping her plan it. You really mean to tell me that an engagement party is supposed to be a surprise?Posted by Queen0fHeartzThrown by someone else/surprise. You can know about your bridal shower, it doesn't mean you're the one throwing it. If your mother is offering to throw it, she would be the host, not you, and in charge of inviting people, etc. Posted by jessicadall[/QUOTE]
    Can you show me were I said I was the host? All I asked was if anyone has been on a banquet cruise before and if the events go as smoothly as a standard banquet event.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_engagement-party-on-a-cruise-ship?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:8fe71613-d4b7-4ad9-bc2d-2f8b84a19ea3Post:f268bb8e-ca27-4738-9383-5484e681456d">Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.: Why is it rude?
    Posted by Queen0fHeartz[/QUOTE]

    I don't think it's necessarily rude.  I don't think of engagement parties as gift-giving occasions per se.  I'm sure some people will bring gifts, but I think of it more as "we're excited to share our news with our friends and we want both sides of our families to meet our new fiance(e)".  If you want, you could write "no gifts please" on the invite, then I think it's totally fine.  The boat sounds lovely!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_engagement-party-on-a-cruise-ship?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:8fe71613-d4b7-4ad9-bc2d-2f8b84a19ea3Post:042c929b-e76b-472a-b97a-42a10c51a2ac">Engagement party on a cruise ship.</a>:
    [QUOTE]Hello all, I am recently engaged and looking into party venues. I am really in love with the Idea of having the party on a NY banquet cruise. There is a certain boat that is absolutely gorgeous and I think it would be a fabulous experience for our guest. I guess I am just wondering If anyone has done or been a part of something like this and if there are any hidden negatives that I may encounter? Thanks :
    Posted by Queen0fHeartz[/QUOTE]

    Also, to reply to your actual question (you're right, you never said you were hosting, it was just assumed because you didn't say in your original post that your mom was hosting, that came later), my only experience with a party on a boat was a post-prom party hosted by my school years ago.  If any guests get seasick, this may preclude them from joining you (I've thought about a boat being part of my bachelorette, which my MOH is planning/hosting, just so no one gives me grief on here), but my best friend gets sick on anything not firmly grounded to land, so that's out.  That's my only input to your question.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_engagement-party-on-a-cruise-ship?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:8fe71613-d4b7-4ad9-bc2d-2f8b84a19ea3Post:79241177-bcd8-4d85-a118-d7df1669c964">Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship.</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Engagement party on a cruise ship. : I don't think it's necessarily rude.  I don't think of engagement parties as gift-giving occasions per se.  I'm sure some people will bring gifts, but I think of it more as "we're excited to share our news with our friends and we want both sides of our families to meet our new fiance(e)".  If you want, you could write "no gifts please" on the invite, then I think it's totally fine.  The boat sounds lovely!
    Posted by Yellobat[/QUOTE]

    <div>You don't write anything about gifts on an invitation. It's against etiquette. And yes, it is rude to host any party in your own honor. You'll look like an attention whore. It's even fine if it is your parents hosting, but you are not supposed to host and plan yourself. That is all.</div>
    my blog - for the love of ein
    'Next time, just fart.' - BriSox81
    image
  • It sounded like you were hosting from your OP so PPs gave the advice they did. I suggest giving more information next time. Since you aren't hosting and your mom is, you're fine. I helped my mom plan my engagement party too because she wanted help even though she hosted. Helping to plan =/= hosting, assuming the host wants help or suggestions. The major drawback to having a party on a boat is that if someone is late they can't come or if someone wants to leave early they can't. Talk it over with your mom and see what she thinks. It may be easier to just have a party on land.
  • KatWAGKatWAG Chicago member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Even though hosting your own E-paryt is really rude. You clearly have decided that you dont care. So I will answer your original question.

    Dont host a party on a boat. I am sure it is a lovely boat with amazing views. But boats suck for parties. Once the boat leaves the dock people cant come and go as they please. What if someone is late? Do you just leave them on the dock? What if someone isnt having fun and wants to leave? Though, wait until the boat docks again? Also, people can get sea sick easily. See the problems.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Thanks for the responses. I don't think people getting sea sick is much of a concern, both my FI and myself come from avid boating families. What I did not consider is the idea of people arriving late. NYC traffic is unpredictable, so that would be a major concern. Thank you all. :
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